So Donald Trump said to Lady Astor… may be THE CLEVEREST column title in the long politically incorrect history of this commentarium. For the very very few of you’ans who “get it”.
If you “get it” you are in a wonderfully unique “maybe 3%” who escaped public education in America before it was hijacked by The Rabid American Left.
If you are a millennial or, worse still, a “snowflake” you don’t “get it”. Oh, and how’s that degree in Useless Navel-gazing working out for you? Being 30-ish living in mom & dad’s basement WAS “your dream job” wasn’t it? Being a bar-back at Starbucks when you’re 40 is going to be fun too. Moving right along…
His name was Winston Churchill. Sir Winston to be correct. Sir Winston is remembered for TWO things.
1) He led England during the early days of WW2… and the horrors of the V-2 Blitzes. Without his stalwart leadership, England would have fallen to Hitler and quite possibly other countries across The Atlantic would have too. Thank you Sir Winston.
2) He, Winston, supposedly had numerous verbal sparring matches with a certain acerbic “Lady Astor”. His retorts to her place Churchill in the rarified air of WC Fields, Groucho Marx and now our very own Donald J. Trump.
Two of Sir Winston’s most oft-quoted comebacks are:
Lady Astor: Mr. Churchill, if I were your wife, I would put poison in your coffee..
Sir Winston: Madam, if you were my wife, I would gladly drink it.
Lady Astor: Mr Churchill, you sir are drunk.
Sir Winston: Yes, I am. And you are ugly. Tomorrow morning however I shall be sober… and you, madam, will still be ugly.
Donald J. Trump, still in his First 200 Days, already being compared to Sir Winston Churchill for “snappy retorts”. Pretty freakin’ cool IMO.
I try to avoid Facebook for the same reasons I don’t swallow thumbtacks or gargle Drano. I know better. No offense intended to those who are losing aged parents or pets or, even worse, “losing liberal friends over politics”.
When I read endless accounts of “losing liberal friends over politics” my rhetorical response is ALWAYS….
So… Are you bragging or complaining?
If you are “complaining”, I have probably UNFRIENDED you. You do know when you UNFRIEND someone THEY NEVER KNOW IT. They do NOT get a notice saying:
“That guy/gal you knew 30 years ago in high school is now a redneck retard who loves Donald Trump and has UNFRIENDED you because your awesome liberal intellect was too much for them to endure.”
They do NOT get that notice.
UNFRIEND those rabid liberal sumbitches NOW. It is even easier than unsubscribing to that rabid liberal newspaper and deleting CNN from your Cable Favorites. Both of those are incredibly easy too.
Where was I? Oh yeah… all the whining today about Donald J. Trump bitch-slapping poor poor poor Mika Whatsheface on that MSCNABCNN whatever network that “your liberal friends” swear by.
“I want my president to act Presidential” !! HOLY CRAP !! What planet do you live on?
The last president to “act Presidential” was James K. Polk in 1849. “James K” did a lot of really neat things in his four years as POTUS. Particularly involving manifest destinying The American West.
Polk campaigned on a promise to only serve one term. He did what he promised (WOW!), leaving office in March 1849. He died three months later of cholera contracted from bad jambalaya while visiting New Orleans. For his four years he “acted Presidential”.
Yeah sure; but they didn’t have Twitter in 1849. Touche.
Would I have bitch-slapped Mika Whatsherface via Twitter like DJ Trump did? Probably not.
Of course, if Donald J Trump had taken my advice… and probably yours last summer, Hillary Clinton would have won in a landslide in November.
Heterosexuality would be outlawed along with all forms of Christian religion… Hillary would have been declared Queen For Life. .. and “Bully” Barber’s picture would probably be on the dollar bill.
Instead we have Donald J. Trump refusing to take crap from media dip***ts.
You and I would have advised Donald to behave like all the Repub LOSERS who preceded him… kiss up to the Rabid American Left Media while they “ripped him a new one” 24/7.
Bob Dole… John McCain… Mitt Romney… (Donald Trump)! Now that is a motley club of LOSERS to aspire for membership with.
What about George W. Bush? Poor ol’ “W”. The highlight of that trainwreck was him wearing a flight suit on the deck of that aircraft carrier pointing to the Mission Accomplished banner. I recall thinking at the time… “Not sure I’d a done that George. There’s still a few bazillion of those insane ragheads out there”.
I am sure Donald Trump will be doing A LOT more “Trump stuff” that you don’t consider “presidential”. I sure as Hell hope so.
A new cocktail is being served at The White House Sunday Brunch?
The Bloody Mika… tomato juice, sour grapes and a celery stalk.
I bet Lady Astor would love it.