A Cardinal Sin and…. Roy’s Re-ward !!

June20/ 2015

The St Louis Cardinals are one of my “favorite teams”. They have gone and stepped in something.  However yucky it turns out to be, they shouldn’t hadna oughta done it.   Say it ain’t so Red Schoendienst.

Crime and Plausible Deniability pays off Big Time for Carolina’s version of Bart Simpson.  Say it ain’t so Bill Friday.

NOTE:  That picture of Three Roys was created by and sent to us by a very long time “Carolina fan” and Chapel Hill resident….. NOT by an ABCer.  🙂

Baseball is no longer America’s Favorite Pasttime.  Baseball has been replaced by Building Up Idols Then Knocking Them Down and Stomping On’em.

Lebron goes 1 0n 5 against Golden State and gets skewered for not winning the NBA Championship all by himself. His “legacy” is tarnished “they are saying”.

Tiger Woods blew all four tires and a water pump at that artillery range in Sasquatch Country. His jet – Tiger One – was wheels up and headed back to Florida before sunset on Friday. Forget Jack’s 18….. will Tiger ever break par again?

Meanwhile, Middle America’s Team – The Cardinals – are about to lap the rest of the National League. They could3643227644_063c940609_b “clinch” by The All-Star Break but there is no joy beneath The Arch.  I have no clue what happened or why the Astros GM “was a polarizing personality” when he was Director Of Player Development with The Cardinals. Apparently he pissed off someone somehow.   Wonder if ….. The Cardinals are calling Robert Kraft and Bill Belichick for advice on Crisis Management.   Please tell me they are not calling “Dickie”.

As with the Patriots’ and UNC, a holier-than-thou sports organization is Embattled, Much-maligned and Beleaguered. The Trifecta of OMG Not Us!

NOTE: Did you know…. Fla State HFC Jimbo Fisher and his wife are divorcing after 22 years of marriage? They are. No word yet just how Jameis is involved but you figure he must be….. bless his heart.

Disbelieving Cardinal loyalists are blaming their own version of Dan Kane and John Swofford.  Every time an organization “gets caught” it’s ALWAYS because some one was “out to get us because they are so jealous of us”.  Yawn…. burp.

Unlike UNC’s TGU where rival fans live next door…. work in the next cubicle…. and even inter-marry; with pro sports messes, there is not much in-yo-face taunting. Board monkeys storm the national talk shows to chortle and snort. No cretins “snort” quite like a goggle-eyed board monkey when a team that usually whups his team’s butt is caught in a major Uh Oh!

For the next few decades, otherwise no-life-losers get to imagine their pitiful lives are somehow better because some people in another city hGeorge-Costanza-OCBD1undreds of miles away are crestfallen that “their team” did something they shouldna done.

Even if the Cardinal’s hacking perp turns out to be “that jackass on the 3rd floor that no one likes because he is a goober and a dweeb” (George Costanza w/ The Yankees) the damage is done.  Cubs fans will lead the chorus of CardinalsCheat for the next decade at least.

The Cardinals will still be my favorite baseball team.  I like their uniforms and Stan Musial was a good guy.  I do hope Cardinals’ Owner Bill DeWitt does NOT announce GM John Mazeliak is getting a raise and a contract extension. I REALLY Hope that does not happen.


You’ve labored thru all the above to see if I go ALLCAPS BALLISTIC re: Bubba Rewards Roy For Pulling Off His Plausible Deniability Scheme.  

I think It is INCREDIBLY STOOPID and an insult to the intelligence of every living being on The Planet. UNC has just “dropped trou and mooned” All Of Earth Beyond Franklin Street.

Why is anyone surprised? So far every major perp with their fingerprints and DNA all over The Scheme has been rewarded with Big Bucks – Dickie – Deborah – Jan – Julius.   Being a co-conspirator in the biggest academic/athletic scandal in American History is the UNC version of Win The Lottery.   Heck.  Would it be fair NOT to reward Roy? …..  Jennifer The Tutor oughta get “her jersey in the rafters” at least.

Bart Simpson

Roy has no idea what Plausible Deniability is nor can he spell it; yet he has pulled it off soooo successfully.   That has to be worth something, right?

Huckleberry just kept doing his Bart Simpson impression…. AND, Damn, IT WORKED!

If the UNC BOT had been the judges at Nuremberg, Hitler would have been named King of Australia and given his own reality show.

Roy should at least be given “a time out” and forced to stand in a corner with his nose in a circle for an hour ….. at least. Instead Roy is given a contract extension and even more money!   What?  No induction in The Secret Order of The Gimghouls? ….. Whats next?

Will UNC bust Bernie Madoff outta prison and name him Dean of Kenan-Flagler Business School?  I’m surprised The BOT Wizards of Smarts didn’t bring back “Dickie” to announce this FUBAR along with Rashad McCants and Kevin Madden.   You gotta figure Marvin is laffing his big ol’ butt off.

Roy Williams is (1) a Hall-of-Fame Coach and either (2) a Crook or (3) a Fool.   Two of those three or maybe all three.  Neither of the latter should merit an AttaBoyRoy Reward.  Whats next America?   Joe Biden as Vice President?  Oops, bad example.  Roy & Joe -“Playing dumb” comes naturally for some people.

Kim Kardashian makes a Top Five Most Admired Women list and Roy gets a Big Ol’ Re-ward.   When do we get to the “rivers of blood and raining frogs”? ….. “Rewarding Roy/Bart” is not simply a miscarriage of justice.   It is a back-alley abortion of justice using a rusty coat hangar.

Bubba is the front man that is uttering the unbelievable banalities to a disbelieving media while trying not to giggle, but it can NOT have been A 100% Bubba Call.  No way.  I’d like to hang this on “Carol From Dartmouth” but it’s well above her “have-a-clue” level.   I smell me some Fat Rams behind this.

I don’t have any names but I definitely smell me some Braggin’ Rights-lovin’ Fat Cat Rams behind this Steamin’ Pile of Stoopid.

If I’m Sylvia Hatchell and I get thrown under the bus as everyone is predicting;  I do believe I would NOT politely say “Thank you sir, may I have another?” I believe I would open “a bank account in the Caymans” and I would tell The BOT and every Fat Ram I know to transfer A LOT of Hush Money really really quickly.

Yes, I do believe I would do that if I were Coach Hatchell….. wouldn’t you.


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