Rimshots 08/02 – CLICK

August02/ 2011

Deems May  VS  Holden Thorp…. 
Deems May wrote a nasty letter about Chanc Thorp – OHMYGOSH !  What to do …. ??  Yes, I know Deems May.   No, we are not friends.  That’s one thing we do agree on.  We’ve tailgated in the same group for 5 years.  All Gawd’s chillen are entitled to an opinion including Deems, me and even you.

    Deems has worked diligently the past 3-4 years to establish a public persona as a swaggering provocative know-it-all “Bully”.  He’s been successful at that.  I get his schtick.  My schtick is semi-intellectual  smart-ass.  Provocateuring is a competitive bizness.

Deems May & Holden Thorp are as fundamentally different as two humans can be.  The Big Bad Jock & The Nerdy Geek.  May does not understand men like Thorp and Friday.  What a Deems May does not understand – a Deems May dislikes.  It’s easier that way.  …. I’m that way with Thai food.  Don’t understand it – don’t want to understand it – dislike it.   …. Deems’ solution to deal with Chanc Thorp is “give him a wedgie” and dangle him out a 3rd floor window by his heels.  That’s how jocks always deal with geeky nerds.  A bit Neanderthal but what the heck.

Deems and his brash opinions find immediate fans among (1) sports talk jockeys, (2) jocks and (2) wanna-be jocks.  That latter group is sizable.  Deems is The Patron Saint of UNC Board Monkeys.  A thimbleful of Deems May bathwater is selling for $247 on InsideCarolina.  His poster is outselling Michelle Beadle in a cat suit. ….. Get Deems a beret and an AK-47 and he could lead Mays Marauders in a march on South Bldg – Che Guevarra May – Power To The People!  YEEEEE HA!

NOTE: Making board monkeys bounce off walls is an over-rated skill.  My columns do it all the time.  I don’t even try to.

One more knee-jerk “letter” gushing with vitriol, snarky insults and predicting the end of UNC as a viable institution by December.  Throw it on the pile.  Next?  …. Look, I applaud Deems for capitalizing on this glorious mess to hype himself.  I’m doing that too in my own inimitable style.

   Is Deems May “credible”?  Would you pay attention to Holden  Thorp instructing Deems May on blocking techniques for Tight Ends? …..  So why do you give credence to Deems May instructing Holden Thorp on the fine points of Chancelloring?  …..  Because he’s big, a bully, and was in the NFL.  That impresses the easily impressed.

Guilty Yes …. But
In the convoluted granny knot that is The Kenan Khaos; I need to clear up a misconception.  Yes, I am defending Holden Thorp BUT not in the blind naive way you might assume.  He is a “big boy” and he made the conscious decision to “go along with the BOT3”.  Had he “gone rogue” last Fall would he have survived?  Impossible to say.
Holden is and will suffer a serious bruise on his Chancellor record for this.  Deservedly so, as it has happened “on his watch”.  Some UNCers will never get past this.  Other UNCers already have.  No ABCer EVER will.
I appreciate the criticism Holden is receiving.  It comes with the parking spot.  I simply want the BOT3 to get what’s due them.   And I am confident they will.


There are two categories of …  
Upset Tar Heels.  (1) The really really passionate football fans.  I don’t share the “price of their passion”, but I understand it….  And  (2) The ones who bought the Sgt Schultz crap.  THAT group scares me.  “Buying that” took more of a leap than Evil Knieval ever tried.

A Class 3 Hurricane …. 
Never thought I’d say this; but a Class 3 Hurricane coming out of The Azores might be a good media diversion right now.   Not that the board monkeys would let that stop them.
Somewhere Near Topsail Island ….
A woman named Dawn is having a stiff drink and laughing her butt off.

Integrity & Intelligence ….
Integrity and Intelligence are qualities that are self-evident.  Both are invalidated by self-proclamation.  If one has to announce that one has either, then one likely has neither.       – BobLee 07/25/11

(Just between you & me, I think THAT comment right there was The Tipping Point that sunk Butch.)

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