Herbie has no feet

BobLee
May02/ 2011

You know the old line – I felt sorry that I had no shoes; until I meet a man who had no feet.   I’ve made a few enemies since last August – ergo “had no shoes”.   But ESPN Gameday’s Kirk Herbstreit – thanks to Buckeye board monkeys …. has no feet.

And I introduce you to my new “friends” – Harlan Coben’s Myron Bolitar, Win The Psychotic Yuppie …. and Esperanza aka “Little Pocohontas”.

♦♦♦

Regular BL Buddies&Babes know rather well, my oft-stated point-of-view relative to the current state of UNC Football has generated a tad bit of dissent.

To those with a myopic BCS Before I Die view of life who can digest incredible amounts of bulls**t washed down with gallons of situational ethics-flavored Kool-Aid, my POV would seem harsh.  To me it’s quite logical.  Butch is either a Fool or a Liar – neither is worth $2.3M.  Assorted ”slings and arrows” have been fired my way as a result of my comments on the subject.

My dissenters amount to a handful of “I’m gonna git you” e-threats,  a bunch of HOW DARE YOU emails ….. and one pathetic old coot who threatened a friend of mine for the high crime of being “a friend of that jackass BobLee”.   Benefits that accrue with being an Internet Provocateur.  Yawn.

Kirk Herbstreit expressing a similar POV to his alma mater’s travails has generated a more demonstrative reaction.  Kirk is a former QB at Ohio State ….. and a former resident of Columbus, Ohio.   I say former resident because Kirk has had to relocate his family to Nashville as a result of serious harassment by the bottom-feeder faction of Buckeye board monkeys.  A rather large, and quite insane, faction apparently.

On any given Fall Saturday 50% of the overly-caffeinated football loonies in America HATE KIRK HERBSTREIT because he and/or Lee Corso or that other guy dare to pick “their team’s” opponent.  Next week they love’em.   It’s a idiot’s kabuki dance that defies logic.

Overly-caffeinated football loonies also hate Kirk Herbstreit because he (1) is drop-dead coed-swoon handsome and (2) makes a ton o’money doing what any goggle-eyed nutjob could do soooo much better….. in what passes as “the minds” for that sub-species of humanity.

Within college football, no talking head is more attached to his alma mater in the eyes of his audience than ESPN’s Herbstreit.  Herbie is arguably the most prominent pundit on the most prominent network for college football, as well as a color commentator for the network’s most prominent games. He also makes the least attempt to obscure his Ohio State roots.

A former OSU Buckeye captain, he proudly puts his children on air in Buckeye jerseys. He’s not afraid to be caught in moments of off-camera homerism, or to unapologetically defend them.  He’s also WAS a regular on sports radio in Columbus, where he was one of the city’s most prominent residents. Before he was literally run out of Columbus.

All that’s fine and should earn one some slack amid a local firestorm.  Not so with the  cretinous knuckleheads of BuckeyeLand.  Apparently one cannot be a “loyal Buckeye” unless one completely resolves Jim Tressel of pretty much anything he has done or is doing ….. so long, of course, as Tressel beats Michigan.

Finding pro-Tressel fans on Franklin Street is about as likely as finding one in Ann Arbor.   Tressel is a no-account lying cheater.  Butchie, however, is the poster boy for contriteness and a hapless victim of misplaced trust in a lifelong friend …. poor widdle Butchie.

Herbstreit and former OSU All-American LB Chris Spielman have both publicly spoken out against the absurd absolving of Tressel by the OSU administration.  I have heard similar concerns off-the-record from former UNC FBers relative to Butchie.  None have come forward publicly.

Herbie also shutdown his Twitter site due to the thuggish reaction from Buckeyes.  “Twittering” seems to be intertwined in lot of NCAA violation issues.

There will be plenty more cases of “win at any costs” coaching issues in the months to come.  The whole shootin’ match is rotten-at-its-core.  No reason to expect a reduction in such behavior.   Until coaches risk their personal careers why should they desist?  So long as each fan base & administration wraps its loving arms around their own perp, why not perpetrate?

I know not what course others may take, but I ain’t moving and I ain’t stopping expressing my opinion.

♦♦♦

Blondie has been addicted to audio-books for several years.  She averages 80+ per year.  Having earbuds surgically implanted is not as painful as you might think.  We have now become an audio-book couple.  

One of her favorite authors has been Harlan Coben.  Harlan and I have now bonded thru six of his “books” over the past ten days.  NOW you know where I’ve been.  Each audio-book represents about eight hours of listening.

Harlan’s main character in his primary series is Myron Bolitar.  Think Jim Spanarkel becomes Jerry McGuire becomes Mike Hammer.

Yes, the main character is a former Duke basketball All-American whose pro career ends before it starts.  He gets a Harvard law degree, becomes a sports agent / investigator.  He is forever becoming entangled in all sorts of criminal shenanigans based around various sports milieus.  A Duke guy?  Obviously the stories are set in New Jersey, duh.

Myron’s former Duke roomie and best buddy is Winsor “Win” Horne Lockwood III.  The consummate Yuppie preppie, Win is “Hawk” to Myron’s Spenser for Robert Parker fans.   Except that Win is deadler than Hawk and thoroughly enjoys inflicting pain on bad guys ….. then killing them.  Win is an investment wizard ….. and sixth degree black belt.  With due respect to Myron, Win is the kick-butt member of the duo.

And there’s Esperanza ….. aka “Little Pocohontas” when she was a professional wrestler.   A saucy Latin beauty who is Myron’s business partner and the third member of this bad guy bashing team.

Beautiful women come and go thru Myron’s life.  Most notably the drop dead gorgeous Jessica Culver who broke Myron’s heart once.  Esperanza refers to Jessica as “the bitch” to Myron’s continual chagrin.

Oh ….. Myron’s #1 rival during his playing days was Greg Downing.  Greg, per Harlan, attended UNC…. and arranged Myron’s career ending injury and went on to a 10-year NBA all-pro career.  Greg married Myron’s college girlfriend.  Myron saves Greg’s life and Greg’s son’s life who is really Myron’s son ….. huh?

The sports stuff is believable.  The characters are deliciously eccentric.   The dialogue has Mickey Spillane’s machine gun rhythm.  Balls bounce….. blood splatters….. Myron broods and ponders…. and Win hurts people.

Harlan Coben’s Myron Bolitar series.   Get a hard copy or download the audio version, but DO IT.

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