September 26, 2023
NOTE: Nature abhors a vacuum ,,, no sooner did “America’s #1 Sports Story” – “Coach Prime Does/Says ________” hit a speed bump in Eugene than “Taylor Swift Shows Up At a KC Chiefs Game” and _______.”.
VOILA … America has a brand NEW #1 Sports Story. Ain’t Life Grand?
I originally intended to do the “Coach Spartacus” commentary last Friday but didn’t. Then a flock of yellow & green Ducks destroyed a herd of rented Buffaloes and Boulder Colorado is no longer the epicenter of America’s sports news microscope. He who hesitates …. etc etc.
As Saturday dissolved into Sunday … CHAOS reigned across the fruited plain of Big Time College Football.
The Tuscaloosa Chapter of barking board monkeys have long accepted that “The Era of Nick” would, alas, end “some day”. “Some day” appears closer than feared as Nick and Miss Terry’s retirement home in Jupiter Florida nears completion. Breaking in a new coaching staff every year does get old fast.
Recall the names Mickey Andrews and Bill Guthridge? Really Really Long Time assistants to Bobby Bowden and Dean Smith during their Dynasties. Their total familiarity with and loyalty to their head coaches was a major factor in maintaining those dynasties.
The obvious “slipping” at both “Bama and Clemson can be attributed largely to continual turnover of key staff … pirated away by Big Bucks leaving Nick & Dabo to retool … every year
The “After Nick WHO” plan at Tuscaloosa has been “we’ll throw $20,000,000/year at Dabo and the Crimson Tide will keep on rollin’ …..” Meanwhile …
The Clemson Chapter of barking board monkeys are sticking For Sale signs in Dabo’s front yard. Their decade plus of Happy Death Valley Days are officially imperiled due – supposedly – to Dabo’s steadfast refusal to go out and rent a bunch of Portal mercenaries.
A Football Palace with its own miniature golf course and barber shop is no longer the recipe for Vicarious Saturday Glory.
It’s not even October yet and Clemson’s chances of a Final Four slot are obliterated. One more “L” and Christmas In Shreveport looms. YIKES!
“Bringing a former back-up placekicker back” was a nice little story but went SPLATT as 80,000 orange-clad former Dabo-lovers did their moribund version of what 80,000 Notre Dame fans would witness in South Bend a few hours later… Snatch Defeat from the jaws of Victory.
The first BRING BACK DANNY FORD sign appeared outside Dan’s Sandwich Shop at 3:35 PM Saturday.
MEMO To All HFCs with Mega-Million Salaries: NEVER call for a play that – in hindsight – did not work.
Before those Clemson barking board monkeys could hatch a plan to “throw Dabo under the bus … and go get us a flamboyant black guy who will bring in 50 jive-talkin’ Portal mercenaries” … those afore-mentioned Ducks treated Coach Prime’s jive-talkin’ logo-stompin’ rented Buffalos like “rented mules” on the shores of the Willamette River in Eugene.
Increasing the black population of Boulder CO from 1% to 1.2% apparently is not The Answer. Although all the frustrated “wokey hippie chicks” in Boulder who had been limited to either “soy boys” or each other are grateful for the testosterone-overloaded new arrivals in their NIL-supplied Lambos and Maybachs.
BUT WAIT …. Saturday Surprises weren’t done yet …
A new contract extension for tOSU’s terminally embattled Ryan Day did not remove the dire consequences if he gets “Harbaughed” AGAIN come November … but first there was a trip to South Bend.
Like the earlier contest in Dabo’s Death Valley … Buckeyes vs Fightin’ Irish was a great game to watch if one’s self worth was not at stake. Mine was not. I like Sam Hartman so I guess I was pulling for the Irish although I don’t care for the all-green unis..
Alas … the Columbus Chapter of barking board monkeys don’t get to “get a rope” for Ryan Day just yet. The South Bend Chapter however are none-too-happy with their guy’s innovative 10-man goalline defense. OUCH!
One more screw-up like THAT and the BRING BACK CHARLIE WEISS billboards will go up around South Bend. OK … maybe not Charlie Weiss.
FYI: I will be an invited guest at The Wally Saturday night as The Irish try to accomplish what has proven impossible this September …. defeat America’s Team – The undefeated Duke Blue Devils – and ESPN’s GameDay circus.
“Wake up the Echoes” of Ace Parker, Sonny Jurgensen, Leo Hart, Mike Curtis, and the $160,000,000 Man – Daniel Jones … Daniel Jones ???
WHO will be GameDay’s “guest picker”? I’m guessing “Coach K” ???
IF Notre Dame had had an 11th man on the goal line at the end of the tOSU game … This Saturday’s game would be The Biggest Game at The Wally since the 1942 Rose Bowl! … sigh.
Far far far removed from the national spotlight … The Wolfpack went up to Charlottesville and came home with “a W”. Thanks to Not One – Not Two – But Three of the Stoopidest Penalties by the Hoos in the history of Football all committed within minutes of each other.
The only obstacle keeping UVA from being the most woeful ACC team in the state of Virginia is Virginia Tech. The two institutions are in a dead heat for overall woefulness.
Things are so bad in Blacksburg that “Sandman” is refusing to enter Lane Stadium.
Mack2.0 finally found Victory in Pittsburgh … even without “Tez”. Are Drake & The Whozits for real? … or will “November” once again prove insurmountable and the sleeping giant continue to slumber? We shall see …
How many “Ls” can Coach Prime absorb from now on and still be “The Future of College Football”?
Of Colorado’s eight remaining Pac-?? games, in only two – Arizona & Arizona State – are they likely to be favored. Will those two Ws plus maybe one upset be enough to keep Coach Prime “above the fold”?
FWIW … No other coach COULD have ever done what Deion is doing at Colorado … Until Now!
As we have chronicled here … every coach who inherits a “flat-lined” program WANTS to cull the existing herd and bring in “his kind of players” as soon as possible … but “sit out a year” transfer rules did not permit it.
Now they can … and will unless the current transfer rules change which is very unlikely … despite Dabo’s strong desire that they would.
Will a coach lacking “Coach Prime’s” penache get away with a full-scale flushing of a program? We shall see.
This week Colorado hosts Southern Cal in Boulder. If “Prime” has Rihanna (The black Taylor Swift??) and Beyonce on his sidelines …. remember you heard it HERE first. Just sayin …
IF the national media OMG !!! OMG !!! OMG !!! reaction to Taylor Swift “dating” a KC Chiefs’ player and attending the game in KC surprises you … you really haven’t been paying attention to “the media” in the past few years.
There are MUCH greater concerns about “the media” than a fixation over Taylor Swift.