June 2, 2020
America Crosses The Rubicon…
To discuss any subject other than – What the Hell is going on in America – would insult the intelligence of everyone connected to this website – as owner / author or as regular or happenstance visitors.
To exercise my option to use this space for a full-throated partisan screed would – to my outdated sense of Arthurian chivalry – be “unfair”.
I will discuss These Troubling Times in a different way than the “knee jerking hyperbole” found on every media platform social and otherwise. I will piss off those I usually piss off… and perhaps a few others.
Such is the plight of a commentator with total accountability for every word he posts.
IF YOU HAVEN’T … I recommend checking out the Reader Comments to O’ Vivian – HOW COULD YOU. Apparently I found the ever-elusive balance between all opinions on this niche topic. What were the odds …
In 49 B.C., Julius Caesar, then Governor of Gaul, brought his legions to the Rubicon River separating Italy and Gaul. To take his legions across the Rubicon into Italy was considered an Act of Treason. Caesar said “anerriphtho kybos” / “let the die be cast” and Crossed The Rubicon initiating a civil war within Rome.
“Crossing the Rubicon” became a metaphor for taking an irrevocable step that commits to a specific course.
“America” – over the past 15-20 years – has obliterated any pretense of being a civilized society – the fault for which lies solely on Them/They. Them/They being anyone not sharing one’s point-of-view on all matters of a socio-cultural-economic-political nature. Them/They are the sole cause of all problems both foreign and domestic. Whoever your designated Them/They is – is as valid a target to place blame as any.
Do keep in mind that…
… Everyone is Someone’s “Them/They”
In the 1780s a group of men – later known as The Founding Fathers – gathered in Philadelphia to craft documents defining “a new Representative Republic” – NOT a “Democracy”.
I won’t bother describing the significant difference in those two forms of governance. With America En Fuego .. semantics don’t much matter, do they?
Going back multi-thousands of year – or millions – depending upon one’s literal interpretation of Genesis or The Koran or Saul Alinsky’s Rules For Radicals whichever is your guidebook for how folks oughta live their lives… “mankind” achieved the “right / privilege” to totally screw up his/her/it’s own life and maybe screw up the lives of everyone else.
It is called Free Will – and why God could only “suggest” that Eve not eat that apple… “Eve” and “Adam” did of course “eat the apple”. And were banished from “Eden”… armed only with that ability to forever screw up one-car funerals… and entire civilizations.
Adam & Eve’s parting words to The Arch Angel being, of course, “It wasn’t our fault… it was Them.” A strategy that is now called “doing a Bart Simpson”.
Eons later those Founding Fathers in Philadelphia studied all the available data on how countless previous groups of people – known as civilizations – had tried to co-exist without eventually cannibalizing one another.
“Tried” being the operative word since all of them eventually failed to various degrees. Even ones like Atlantis that may never have existed in the first place.
Supposedly, Thomas Edison failed over 1,000 times before he created the light bulb. Edison was actually trying to reach India by sailing due west thereby proving that Earth revolves around the Sun not the other way around.
Edison’s many failures were forgotten in America’s excitement to finally ask – “How many (insert racial-ethnic slur) does it take to change a light bulb?”
The Founding Fathers did not have Edison’s luxury of 1,000 failed experiments.
This new nation –
… named for Amerigo Vespucci who decided Columbus had landed on a Continent and not “just an island”… so “they” named that continent in his honor – UNCCH officials, of course, wanted it to be named Eddie Smith Continent.
– was desperate for a copy of Governing a Nation… For Dummies.
As fast as Thomas Jefferson could write they came up with “the best they could” given the circumstances.
The Founding Fathers knew the fatal flaw built into their guidebook in the 1780s was the very same one that befell all those failed socio-political experiments – Rome – Assyria – Egypt – The Mongols – Mayans – Incas – Cahokians – et al.
That one “ability” that Adam & Eve fled Eden with –
Man’s Ability to Screw-up – One-Car Funerals… and Reasonably Successful Civilizations.
The countdown to National Self-destruction began in the 1780s. That the slow-burning fuse has lasted about 250 years is to the credit of those F-Fathers. Sure… Egypt and Rome lasted 1,000 years but technology in this “Age of Now” has accelerated change. A “year” today equals a “century” in “the old days”. It’s like “dog years”.
The same impatience that compels us to stare at microwaves and computer monitors and yell HURRY UP … has led America to The Edge of The Abyss in only 250 years.
Yes… I am hearing all The Obvious Solutions to What Ails America.
The Most Practical Solutions – in no particular order – are:
Get Rid of The Designated Hitter
Re-Elect Donald Trump
Do Away with All Bike Lanes on busy Public Streets
Install MORE Bike Lanes on busy Public Streets
Lynch Donald Trump … and anyone who supports him.
Install “Chicago Jesus” and “BigMO” as King & Queen of Obama-Land
Do Away with The Electoral College
Do Away with All Colleges … except Your Alma Mater
Do Away with All Public Restrooms – Just “go” like they do in San Francisco.
Abort Every Baby … Who might someday vote Republican
Nuke California and New York
Nuke “Fly-Over Country”
Outlaw Heterosexuality… AND church “covered dish suppers”
Replace Ruth Buzzi Ginsberg with Whoopi Goldberg
Do Away With Fossil Fuels, Carbohydrates and Nancy Pelosi
Replace Whoopi Goldberg with “The Imaginary Governor of Georgia”
Declare “BobLee” as America’s Common-Sense Czar… for Life – YIKES!
Each of these Proposed Solutions has some merit to some people … 96% of whom you do NOT want to sit beside you on a flight of any duration.
So… in conclusion… as our Modern Day “Caesar and his legions” set foot on the far shore of The Rubicon circa 2020. The sight that meets them is…
The same sight that astronaut “George Taylor” (Charlton Heston) saw in that final scene of Planet Of The Apes …
Taylor/Heston realizing the grim reality – slams his fists on the sands of the beach and screams …
“You maniacs! You blew it up!
Damn you! – Damn you all to hell!”
As the Founding Fathers shrug their shoulders … “Hey, we gave it our best shot”… sigh.
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