Nov 15, 2019
Airports Implement “Turn Off CNN” Option … FINALLY
In effect for only a few hours… air travelers are already hailing this newest addition to Airports Worldwide as…
“The greatest boon to air travel… since TSA started hiring NFL Cheerleaders to conduct full body cavity searches!” … WHOA!
In response to well over 63,000,000 repeated requests for the past three years, Airports around the world – Yes, even that scary one in Lagos, Nigeria – have implemented a Turn Off CNN Option in all boarding waiting areas.
Yes, it will cost “you” a quarter for 15-minutes of CNN-less Peace & Quiet but no one has objected… and no objections are expected… one traveler’s comment was particularly “interesting”.
“Thank Goodness… now when I fly to Vegas for “Well, you know” I won’t have to look at that bald-headed nitwit son of mine flapping his pie hole…” – Mrs Stelter AKA “Brian’s Mother.
Complete details on this AWESOME News were first posted on one of My Personal Favorite Websites – BabylonBee.com
BabylonBee.com / Nov 14, 2019
WORLD—Airports around the world are reporting record revenues after introducing a long-awaited feature: the ability to turn off CNN on television sets in their terminals.
For just one quarter, you can turn off CNN for a full fifteen minutes while you’re waiting for your flight, leaving you with the “far superior” experience of just staring at a blank screen.
“At long last,” said one man waiting for his flight at LaGuardia as he dropped a few dollars’ worth of quarters into the “Turn CNN Off” slot. “Honestly, I might fly more now.” He’s not alone: airports expect a 426% uptick in traveling over the holidays as flyers no longer have to worry about having the droning words of CNN hosts pounded into their heads for hours on a layover.
The feature has been one of the most-requested by travelers along with the dismantling of the TSA and pretzel bags with more than 3 pretzels in them. … READ MORE…
PS: You do know that BabyonBee is a “you know…” website. Don’t you?