BL: A HUMDINGER… and “Skippy” has another bad day at ESPN

John Skipper
BobLee
October27/ 2017

A HUMDINGER of a Ballgame… and

Skippy @ ESPN has ANOTHER Bad Week or so.

IT was a bona-fide HUMDINGER of a Baseball game. … World Series Game Two – Dodgers v World SeriesAstros – Dodger Stadium. Even Kennel didn’t see IT and he’s a Dodger die-hard so I doubt many if any of you saw IT. Did ya’ll know BK taught Roy Campanella how to squat? … I digress.

You know five of My Top Five “Things”:
• Lonesome Dove
• Brunswick Stew
• CHAOS
• Diner Breakfasts
• HUMDINGERS

Road House is in the 2nd Five at #7

Last night (Wed) Game Two did not reach Game Six 2011 (Freese HR) magnitude or Game Seven 1960 (Mazeroski HR) because it was not a DO or Die situation. If it had had that pressure… Lordy Lordy the entire LA electrical grid woulda shut down three times in those last four innings. It was THAT GOOD!

Mary Hart was there. Kate Upton… Payton Manning… “Fernando”… a coupla notorious rappers(??)… and yours truly was glued to my IMac the entire four + hours.

Glued to my IMac ?? Yeah… Raleigh’s #1 Limo Liberal- Jim Goodmon is in a pissin’ contest with ATT Uverse so his NBC and Fox channels are shut-off. Since I’m a MLB.tv guy I went to Plan B which is via my IMac thru MLB.com. Screw you Goodmon… you demented ol’ coot. Where was I?

I don’t have a “my team” in this Series. Nor do I have a “I hate…” team. Apparently having an “I hate…” team is a new rule in Sports Fans Are Stoopid World. I’m not a rules guy. I did not have an emotional investment in the game.

Speaking of “not actually a rule”… Brad Paisley (CW singer) sang the SSB. They didn’t show all 50,000 but it looked like a Baseball game and NOT an NFL game if ya get my drift… and I’m sure you do….   There being a lot of south-of-the-border types in LA, it made sense to ask Jose, can you see…  Apparently Jose could indeed see.  What Jose saw was a HUMDINGER.

I won’t go thru the whole 11 innings just because, but the 8-9-10-11th were “otherworldly”. And I’ve seen a LOT of baseball.

It helps to know a bit about the two team’s personnel and their ups / downs the past several weeks. Then throw all that out… because ZERO of it followed “the script”.

“THE Best Closer in Baseball” got beat like a rented mule. … Several Astros who were “0 for October” found their strokes in those final innings. … A ball bounced off a centerfielder’s cap bill saving a run. … A pick-off throw hit an ump in the leg saving a run. … A banjo-hitting back-up SS with three HRs in two years… went YARD in the 11th and almost hyperventilated running the bases. …. The Dodgers’ Quite Crazy Cuan threw his glove ala Bad News Bears… then hit a monster HR that landed in Bakersfield… then flailed at a slider in the dirt to finally end 4:24 of a HUMDINGER. …Eight HRs were most ever hit in one WS game.

Dodgers were down to their last pitcher. One more inning and they were calling Chelsea Handler’s midget.

Oh… Astros won the first WS game in the history of the franchise 7-6 now head home to Houston tied 1-1.

###

Doeren’s Duel With Destiny in the Shadow of The Golden Dome is gonna have to go a ways to top last night.

My inside sources tell me the Doerenians are forsaking their new traditionl gray-on-gray funeralunis for the old-fashioned white-on-white with Struttin’ Tuffy on their helmets.   No clue who made that call but HUZZA to whoever it was… I’ve always like Struttin’ Tuffy.

###

Meanwhile in the bucolic Sodom & Gomorrah of Bristol Connecticutt…

A bad “seems like forever” got worse… then got worse some more.

Poor Skippy The ESPN CEO, that’s John Skipper (UNC’75) from Lexington NC.

Ya know you’re having a buncha bad days when Harvey Weinstein calls to say he’s “feelin’your pain”… but is not interested in changing places with you.

Bob Iger

Robert Iger is Skippy’s Big boss as honco of Disney. Let’s imagine Iger’s Executive Secretary, Hilda Wiggelburt, having to interrupt her boss…

“Excuse me, Mr. Iger…”
“Yes, Hilda, what is it? Speak up Woman…”
“Yes sir… well sir… I aaahh… there’s ANOTHER sh** storm in Bristol, sir.”

Iger spins in his chair to face out on the Disney back-lot where Pirates of The Caribbean #26 – Jack Sparrow Coaches ECU is wrapping up. He pulls out his fidget and starts fidgeting with it… rubbing his temples.

He reaches for his phone and hits a well-worn number…

“Mr. Skipper office, this is “Terri with an i”. May I help you?”

“Let me speak to that blithering idiot”

Just a moment, sir. Mr. Skipper, it’s for you, It’s Mr. Iger… Again.

“Hey Bob… those Dodgers are really…

“Shut up you burlap sack of flaming incompetence. I want ONE DAY… just 24 little hours without hearing “Mr Iger there’s another sh*t storm in Bristol.” … What is it this time? That sassy little black gal go all Angela Davis on you again?  Skipper, your concept of “diversity” is to have every ethnic group in America hating us… are transgendered Eskimos picketing us … YET?

No sir… Jemele hasn’t done anything too bad since noon our time which is 9 AM your time. Hopefully we get thru one day without another Jemele eruption. … But, uh, since I have you; I am having an issue with a group called Barstool Something or other…”

“What do you call “an issue” you pinhead?”

“Well I signed them to a 20-show deal to do a 2 AM show out-of-the-back-of-a-van … and…”

“Ahhh geeez… let me guess. You had no clue what kind of show they do. They probably are a couple of scruffies in dirty t-shirts who sit around dropping F-bombs, making whoopee cushions jokes and showing pics of skanky gals with big hooters…”

“Ahhh, yes sir. That is what they do. I fired them after one show, but it seems they have “a contract” and we owe them a rather large sum… the equivalent of a few 1,000 cord-cutters.”

“I thought I told you to never mention cord-cutting to me…?  And whats this I’m hearing about some bimbo named Jenn Sterger?  You could screw up a one-car funeral Skippy.”

“Yessir. You did. My bad. I have another idea that might recoup all that though.

“This oughta be a hoot. What is your great idea this time Skippy.”

“I’ve hired Colin Kaepernick’s muslim girlfriend – Nessa – to do a documentary on “How To Bring An America Sports League to Its Knees… Pun Intended”. Clever huh? Mr. Iger? … are you there, Mr Iger?”

“Mr Skipper, Mr Iger hung up. Can I leave early? My plantar fasciitis is acting up.”

… as the sun sets on another day in the bucolic New England community of Bristol.

PS:  Speaking of Tough Jobs… There are 30 MLB teams.  Eight of those 30 “made the playoffs”.  Of those eight.. THREE have now fired the managers that got them there…. Boston, Washington and today – NY Yankees.

###

STOP… Before you wander off… a very important assignment.  Remember that brouhaha about CarolinaPlotthound being killed by that twerp John Hood?  Pierce told us there would a newer version of that UP soon.   As usual AP was “on the money”.  Go over to AgentPierce’s site for details on how it all came together earlier tis week … THEN go over to the new site… AP – 1st … then the new site.

What are you waiting for? Get going...

###

More of BobLee -Link

AgentPierce’s Latest  – LINK

Blondie’s Latest  – LINK

BobLee

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Gear Up
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Gear Up

Next up for the Big Four football Sleeping Giant status award: Wake Forest. Seems the Wolfpack was not up to the task. Big game, big flop. Those “signature wins” over FSU and Louisville look more like forgeries after this weekend. Someone call the FBI, oh wait, they’re busy covering up for The Clintons, Comey and Mueller. UNC playing for pride, almost upsets The U. Look for the Pretenders, not Contenders Wolfpack to drop two of the next four, miss the SWOFF Bowl and get drubbed by CAROLINA in the Peach Bowl. Said Charlie Brown to Lucy and the Wolfpack faithful:… Read more »

fayettewuf
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fayettewuf

Speaking of uniform colors, did you notice that UNC decided to confuse Miami by dressing up like Duke today. As for the World Series, I have no dog in the fight either but pull against the Dodgers out of habit and also I like seeing Kate Upton jump for joy. What is your take on the Cuban on Japanese racist gesture incident?

Chu Mei
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Chu Mei

Baseball – STEROIDS
Basketball – ELIGIBILITY SCANDAL
Football – MILLIONAIRE SOCIAL JUSTICE WARRIORS
Tennis – TRANSGENDER PLAYERS

What exactly is the American fascination with sports, gun violence, political corruption and societal deviancy?

– One of the eight billion Chinese followers

Chip
Guest
Chip

I recall Caleb Presley, former UNC football morale coach, is/was one of the Barstool Sports podcasters. Heard him on Adam Carolla and Mark Schlereth’s podcasts. Seems all the podcast one folks have to have each other on. Really enjoyed the column on the Pack’s date with destiny. Heading up for the game as I’ve always wanted to go there. Win or lose we’ll have fun. I’d actually take your scenario of losing tomorrow and winning the rest through the swofford bowl and losing a New Years game. If Doeren left for greener pastures after that I’d wish him well. Gotta… Read more »

BC.PV
Guest
BC.PV

Great column, BL!! Loved the “back and forth” conversation with Skipper and Iger! Very clever.

TarSpartan
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TarSpartan

Sad to say, I conked out after the Astros hit their two homers in the 10th. I should have known the baseball gods are more fickle than that. Also, as the announcers were hyping up the closer, all I could think was “Even Mariano Rivera blew a save in the 2001 WS.” No one is perfect in the WS except Don Larsen. I’m looking forward to Game 3 tonight! Like you, I don’t really have a horse in this race, but since I’ve lived in Texas for almost 15 years and the Astros have never won a series, I guess… Read more »

Doug
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Doug

Do What? Barstool Sports starting at 2AM? All JS had to do is take my mama’s advice. “Nothing good happens after midnight.”

Todd Lesley
Guest
Todd Lesley

I had just told my wife the nice thing about this series is that …if the Dodgers are winning in the 7th…you can go to be early. The streak of 28 scoreless innings was then broken and I missed a damn good game. BTW…found a nice 10 minute recap on Youtube the following morning. It cut out all the Yasiel Puig bat licking segments though…thank GOD!

NCSU68Grad
Guest
NCSU68Grad

BL, I apologize in advance for NOT being a MLB major fan. However, it sounds like you have the situation under control and that is all that matters. I only watch ONE MSM “show” and that is The Black List (reminiscent of John Swofford’s heart). IT, unfortunately DOTH come on NBC. Therefore, I switch the “inputs” to channels and invoke my “We ain’t NO electricity or Internet PLAN B) and use my trusty attic mounted triple amplified Dome (as in Dean) dish and watch TBL live and in real time. THEN, I cut off WRAL and do something beneficial. I… Read more »