Will The Fat Lady Sing at The UNC/NCAA” Showdown In Music City (Nashville)” ?
Raise your hand if you think “the Fat Lady WILL sing” at Wednesday’s much anticipated Showdown in Music City (Nashville). 
TeamBubba versus The NCAA COI Goons… featuring Goofy Ol’ Roy at a live mic …hopefully.
All of you with your hands raised…. YOU LOSE!
Whether you want UNCCH’s Great Unpleasantness (a.k.a TGU) to ever end or not… it WILL NOT be this week. Or next week… or many weeks to come.
… and that’s not counting the inevitable civil suits / appeals.
Really, would you rather have a fat opera singer… or Ol’ Roy in full Tourette’s mode? I’ll take Giggles w/ Roy every time.
Put an indefinite hold on…. the cherry picker to cut down ever how many banners might be imperiled. …. the celebration bonfires on The Brickyard. …. the picnic party in KrzyzewskiVille.
There WILL BE new chapters written Wednesday and Thursday which will, of course, create yet another Twitter Tsunami from those totally obsessed with this. And you know who you are.
Alas, no perp walk YET for TeamBubba… No “Last Supper”… No UNC Braveheart screaming “FREEEEDOM” as a once-oh-sooo-proud institution is publicly disemboweled for all to see.
We likely won’t know what happens in Nashville for “a while”. It is a closed Showdown In Music City. OK, sure… as soon as Roy walks out the door a dozen tape recorders will be shoved in his face and… you know what hilarity could ensue with that.
The thought of Bubba doing “a Hannibal Lechter” with Roy is, I understand, being considered. The visual of that might be even better than whatever “load of crap” Roy is likely to spew.
I am going to strongly urge you to watch a 30-minute video with “That Damn” Dan Kane & Andrew Carter of The N&O.
It was posted Monday night. Nothing that most of you haven’t memorized but a nice recap of all the huffin’ and puffin’ over the past seven years. Lord Knows the financially beleaguered N&O can sure use the clicks.
In their video, TDDK and Carter mention The Martin Report. Just hearing those three words gets me smiling like a Cheshire Cat.
The Martin Report at The Carolina Inn and The Randy Parton Press Conference at The Umstead are THE TWO most absolutely hilarious events I have ever witnessed in person.
Both events confirmed my long-held belief that God has one helluva sense of humor to create a species capable of such ridiculous absurdum.
That classic exchange between a UNC Trustee and Jim Martin…
Q: “Governor, did you meet with Coach Williams?”
A: “Well, no I didn’t. I figured Coach Williams was too busy to take time to see me…”. YEEEE HAA!
NOTHING that has been pontificated since that magic moment has come close to so well summarizing this Endless Circus Of The Absurd.
OK… Sylvia Hatchell’s line that “Jan Boxill is THE most ethical person I’ve ever known” runs a close second. But I still give Guvy Jim the prize. You are entitled to your favorite. I have mine.
Oh… Oh… Oh… about a month or so ago I started referring to “Deb” Crowder and Burgess McSwain as “UNC’s Manson Girls”. Which one would be “Squeaky” Fromme. Take your pick. “Deb” and Burgess would (and did) do ANYTHING they thought might please “HIM”.
I don’t know, and neither do any of you including “my buddy Art”, how much of all this “Dean knew about”. He knew every other minute detail about “his program” but maybe this itty bitty detail slipped by him somehow… maybe ??
The delicious irony is IF Dean did NOT know about the Eligibility Scam then he was NOT omniscient. Acknowledging that Dean Smith was NOT omniscient is as sacrilegious to many Tru Blues as acknowledging he DID know about it. …. One of soooo many delightful tidbits in all this.
Wednesday / Thursday will come and go and all that has been said will be said again… and again… and again.
Without a single note from “the fat lady”. Sorry about that.
I am going to predict that:
“Silent Sam” will NOT be standing erect in one piece on UNCCH’s campus on September 1.
That takes us into a whole ‘nother issue going on that might actually be more important than The Greatest Eligibility Scandal in NCAA History… Ya think?
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AgentPierce just posted a Sledge Hammer Column …. LINK
The NCAA is at a serious crossroads. Can they find a place to satisfy UNC and the rest of the world without ripping the bandaid off? I doubt it. This will end up in federal court.
Yep… where it will fester for another 3-5 years. That UNCCH legal defense bill will top $50M for sure. At some point it’s got to hurt those deep-pocket Rams just a little bit, don’t think? … and it’s ALL about “Bragging’ Rights”.
Once it gets to Federal Court, there is a better than 50/50 chance that the NCAA will have their motion to dismiss granted. The only way the NCAA can mess this up is if they GROSSLY did not follow their own rules and bylaws like the Penn State fiasco. BTW, penalties issued by the NCAA will be upheld unless UNC wins in court and has them overturned. In other words, if they are banned from postseason before they win their case, that’s just tough for them if the court has not ruled in their favor in time for a bowl… Read more »
But we are still months away from learning the penalties. I don’t understand why that is the case. If the committee has heard all the evidence why can’t they discuss it like a jury over several days and issue an opinion ??
That is the way the NCAA has always operated.
Here is a comparison note: The COI met with Louisville for about 2/3 of the time they spent with UNC.
What I don’t understand is the lengthy delay now in releasing their “verdict”. Why does that take another 60-90 days?
Great question. Everybody knows the charges and what UNC’s defense consists of. How can it take 2-3 months to decide what the penalties, if any, will be? If the Warren Commission had taken this much time, we’d probably know who was on the grassy knoll.
This whole fiasco has been a Monty Python movie of a Gilbert & Sullivan play … farce and satire!
BL, Unless I am mistaken, all the $20 Million spent to date has come from ONE source….and NOT the Ram’s Club. Little Ms. Blue Smurfette discussed this in a news conference. Go here for the “official” answer. http://carolinacommitment.unc.edu/faqs/ . Here is a blurb (copy/paste) from the website. “Then UNC President Ross and Chancellor Folt commissioned the independent, eight-month investigation by Kenneth Wainstein and his firm, Cadwalader, Wickersham & Taft LLP, to receive the most thorough and complete report possible into past academic irregularities at UNC-Chapel Hill. . The University received an invoice for $3,111,385.17. That total includes $115,775.42 for expenses… Read more »
It is a matter of semantics. “The $$$” can be from RC Fat Cats given directly to the UNC Foundation. The $$$ would not have to be funneled thru The RC. IMO… a “war chest” was set up several years ago to be kept stocked as needed.
Assuming Ole Roy doesn’t know nothing, can you imagine what was in that briefcase that was so heavy, it was pulling his jacket off of his shoulder.
My first guess would be a coupla dozen cans of Coca Colas. Or a few pairs of Nikes he plans to stuff in his mouth when his turn comes up.
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I can imagine Bubba and Larry looking over at Roy and “Deb” and “Chihuahua” and Sylvia and Boxill and thinking “How’d we get mixed up with this bunch of sideshow freaks? Is this a Twilight Zone episode?”
Yea, Tulsa and Southern Miss may not be all that bad in comparison. I can see Bubba asking “Dean, Dean Wormer? Oh, Smith. What department did he head again? Was I supposed to know him?”.
Meanwhile Fedora is blinking morse code to Ole Miss “I’m available, call me”
REALLY! The Star Wars Cantina Goes To Nashville… all they needed was (1) Dickie “Prince Tassel Loafer” Baddour playing “Hark The Sound” on a kazoo… and (2) “Uncle Julius” doing a Fred Sanford impression.
Roy don’t drink Co’Cola from a can.
HAA! I stand corrected. ORW had a dozen 12 oz Co’Cola bottles in his bag! 🙂
BL, any leaks from Music City? MAHA
Nothing I’ve seen. I get my info from “Damn Dan” Kane’s twitter feed. Deb “Manson Girl” Crowder testified yesterday. OMG, Is SHE SCARY UGLY! YOWSAA!!
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I’m no lawyer but… none of these people are “under oath”. If they are “less than truthful” in what they say to the NCAA, I don’t think there is any personal liability for them.
You sure Deb isn’t Leonid Brezhnev’s offspring?
REALLY !!! I’d be surprised if any of the clocks are working in the UNC AfAm Dept…
It will all be over by Friday … the Trump pardon has been drafted and signed. Roy Cooper will announce he has turned Republican to save his Alma Mater and protect The Carolina Way. The truth is you can’t handle the truth because the truth was buried with DES. Unless Roy breaks down on the stand and confesses to his crimes, the tarnished banners will flutter in the Nose Dome until Armageddon.
That scenario would not surprise anyone.
“…If one doesn’t have rivals in-their-face 24/7 the impact is non-existent…” This is undeniably true. A great friend in college was perhaps the most virulent, toxic, aggressive embodiment of the ABC culture that I’ve ever known. After graduating, he settled in a neighboring state and, after a year or so, there was an unmistakable drop-off in his…passion. He eventually said, “you know, when you don’t have that (stuff) in your face every morning, it just doesn’t matter that much…” I’m afraid today’s proceedings will likely be anticlimactic for the more zealous followers on both ends of the spectrum. Today is… Read more »
Shhhhh… I AM The Grand PuppetMaster !!! 🙂
This os so much all about Water Cooler & Cup-de-sac Wars.
Letting social media “get in your face” is stoopid as it is simple to Unfriend / UnFollow … UNLESS one secretly enjoys the rock-throwing crap.
Bob,
Have you ever counted the number of your columns that have mentioned TGU?
I say the over/under is in the 250 range!
And new readers are still wondering what it means. Imagine typing out The Great Unpleasantness that many times. Seven / eight years is a long time to beat one “horse” that simply won’t roll over and die. Duke Lacrosse only lasted about 16 months by comparison.
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I can’t imagine a more fascinating issue to have for so long. It involves the psyche of multiple fan bases with the one under attack having the ideal “group personality” to keep picking at.
I never pondered this, of course, but in a few passing moments, I cannot come up with another topic of any possible topic that could have the stamina and intrigue as TGU. It only works in the Triangle, and points where vast numbers of Tar Heels accumulate. Any other scandal is long since forgotten, mostly because the institution wants to quickly put it behind them. Politics flushes out these types of issues due to the election cycle. Celebrities only dream of being relevant for this long. . TGU: The Golden Goose of Column Fodder! And to think, the crescendo is… Read more »
EXCELLENT POINTS! … Certainly TGU burns the brightest & hottest here at Ground Zero… because of the proximity of UNCCH’s most hated rivals all sharing the same regional media. That has always been a unique aspect of the UNC / NCSU / Duke Tri-Rivalry… that no other rivalries have in such a geographical umbrella. This one festers at every water cooler and in every cul-de-sac. . Certainly there has been a desertion of a % of UNC “fans”… likely more from the Alum/Fans faction than from the WalMarters. The WM Fans never paid attention to “the image of the institution”.… Read more »
You are in good company. One of his points was, I don’t want to be associated with the Berkeley of the East anymore. One day, your ice floe is going to to have a lot of traffic, I think. Life moves on normally for everyone, with or without that deep college bind. Eventually the kids go off to school, and you become an App fan or ECU fan by default of checkbook.
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Just promise me you will alert on Twitter as soon as Roy starts to explode on camera. I do not want to miss this next chapter.
If I wasn’t living at Ground Zero, if I was in Dallas or Kansas City, I doubt I would know who Deb Crowder or Uncle Julius or even Mary Willingham was. I “might” check box scores but that all. . Holden Thorp once asked me “Why does everyone care so much what happens here (UNCCH)?” My answer was “everyone doesn’t care” and the further away from The Old Well one is, the less they “care”. For every hard-case TruBlue in NYC or Atlanta, there are 1,000 “fans” who just check box scores. If one doesn’t have rivals in-their-face 24/7 the… Read more »
Has it actually been confirmed that Roy and Sylvia are going. I thought they had been “invited” but did not know it was mandatory. Fedora would probably go because he wasn’t around and all he wants is to go to Tex.A&M. Bubba would probably be better off leaving the other two at home. MAHA.
I’m pretty sure the “invitation” was actually more of “Have their sorry asses here and don’t be late or else..”.
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I suspect Bubba would prefer having a black mamba stuffed in his underwear rather than “Roy on the loose with live mics.” I would imagine he (Bubba) will have a couple of tranquilizer darts in his pocket as needed.
Oh Oh Oh …. Today’s Interesting news tidbit. . You all remember the John Feinstein column. I speculated in that that Feinstein and “my buddy Art” were likely long time chums. BUT was I wrong. “My buddy Art” DESPISES Feinstein. He (Art) blistered JF in his WCHL column several weeks ago. Not only for his comments about TGU but calling JF a hack writer who has lived off one book – Season On The Brink – his Bob Knight first book. . He accuses JF of writing the same book multiple titles under different titles. That was classic coming from… Read more »
If the fat lady sang I’d be left with my own empty, meaningless existence. I’d be relegated to reading punditry all day.
You say that tongue-in-cheek but it will be a very real dilemma for many on both sides of the issue. TGU Withdrawal might become a recognized medical condition with its own lapel ribbon and 10K Run For The Cure. There are children entering 3rd grade who have never known a world without a UNCCH Scandal.
BL, this just about the perfect blend of truth and humor from my vantage point.
Thought the N&O video was excellent also.
Thanks in both cases.
Enjoyed your Nashville/Opera conflation and appropriate graphics.
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Don’t agree with your Silent Sam prediction because Agent Pierce will make a visible and physical defense with more finesse than Charlottesville.. My true feelings on that subject have been written but probably would not be appreciated here. ????????????
Silent Sam has been standing on “borrowed time” for the past ten years. That S-Sam survived eight years of BHO is astounding. It will likely confound you that neither AP nor I much care one way or the other. What happens “over there” to Sam or otherwise is of ever-decreasing concern other than as general observational fodder. It (UNCCH) is, IMO, a very corrupt institution that is beyond “saving”. . I had a UNC alum of the 60s comment off-line this AM that if Sam is removed he “will never set foot on that campus again”. Which means he has… Read more »
The pattern is set. Orwell’s Nineteen Eighty-Four has finally come home to roost. “Every record has been destroyed or falsified, every book rewritten, every picture has been repainted, every statue and street building has been renamed, every date has been altered. And the process is continuing day by day and minute by minute. History has stopped. Nothing exists except an endless present in which the Party is always right.” I care about art, statues/symbols about as much as you care about music. Never enjoyed 1984 as I considered it wildly unrealistic. I no longer think it is but those in… Read more »
Hang in there. Maybe I’ll rerun Pier Fishing w/ Dad as well as Randy Parton At The Umstead. They both take us back to slightly less trying times.
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How many of the rabid mongrel mob have ever heard of 1984 or George Orwell? Damn few if any.
Maybe you’ll be able to announce and report the Greenville, NC team WINS the Little League World Series. Playing game 1 tonight against a team from South Dakota. NC has only sent 5 teams to the LLWS ever and 2 of those teams hail from G’Vegas, 1998 & 2017. Maybe the second time can be a charm. Neat experience for 12 y/o’s. The ace is a 6’1″, 149lb throwing 70+ MPH which converts to 96-97 MPH in the next level according to the “World Wide Leader.”
Go Pitt County Boys Go !!!!
Operator error. Greenville’s first game is Friday at 8 p.m. against Sioux Falls, S.D. ????
Greenville NC versus Sioux Falls SD…. the massive national fan bases for those two cities should be a ratings BONANZA… MUST-SEE TV!
It took UNC TEN years to resolve the Anson Dorrance sexual harassment case.
This “academic fraud” case will take at least THIRTY years to resolve.
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If UNC can stretch out a sexual harassment case for ten years, can’t imagine this will go beyond ten years.
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Prediction, case will outlast NCAAs existence, and college football will have been banned from college athletic programs.
I can easily see TGU outliving the NCAA but that will be because The Power Five schools bolt and form their own “We Never Cared About Academics” Organization.
I like the idea of Roy in a Hannibal Lechter mask permanently. That he could very well “go Ol’ Roy” in Nashville is highly probable.
You gotta figure the COI has Roy there for a reason. If they even ask him just one innocuous question it could “set him off”. I freely admit I hope like hell they do give him a live mic. Roy “going Roy” will make NCAA history for sure. Just another permanent stain on The Institution.
That Silent Sam has lasted until 2017 is a testament to how weak the lefties and Snowflakes actually are. One could postulate as to why he still stands proud. My best guess is they do not wish to injure the grass, and have not figured out a way to lower him gently without upsetting the environs. Maybe they were all too busy trying to force the Boy Scouts to go co-ed and open to preteen trannies than to actually attend and learn how to tie a knot. . Sept 1 is a lock for him to be down. I would… Read more »
I have “The Randy Parton” in my Classics Lockbox. I promise to repost it SOON! I always get a kick out if that one too. 🙂
The N&O REALLY NEEDS SOME HELP TO STAY SOLVENT. UNC MIGHT ALSO NEED SOMETHING TO STAY SOLVENT.
The Old Reliable is on life-support. If the check from Sacramento doesn’t come each month, the not-yet-fired employees will be working by candlelight.
You DO realize that the UNC/NCAA meeting with the aforementioned cast of characters, sans the lady that will replace Marie Osborn in the “buy this food, all you fat a$$’s” commercials, was scheduled for August 21. . God had already planned to make his wishes known and the sky would NOT be Carolina Blue. But the NCAA changed the time so as not to be accused of being fundamentally Christian and, by coincidence, have the skies over Asheville go DARK…. . As to the outcome, who knows….it will NOT be known for some time. There will be many more fake… Read more »
I KNEW if I kept letting you “do yo thang” here, you would one day Hit A Homer! I actually “got” about 95% of this one. The “Marie Osborn” (??) reference notwithstanding.
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As for AgentPierce… his latest sledge hammer column is being loaded “as we speak”. Should be up by 10:45 AM. As usual… AP takes no prisoners.
Not that it makes a whole lot of difference but I think he meant “Marie Osmond”. But I don’t know who is going to take her place. Nor do I care.
I’m sure he did but with ’68 one can never be too sure. I have not heard about any one replacing Marie either. Not having strong opinions on this subject is probably a healthy attitude.
N&O link works fine for me also…
It will all end sometime near the time of the Final 4 Men’s BB tournament in 2018. The COI will deliver their prescribed punishment. . BobLee, in order for UNC at Chapel Hill to sue at that point, they will have to show where the NCAA willfully violated their own procedures, bylaws and regulations to have standing to sue. One reason this whole scandal investigation has dragged on for so long is that the NCAA does not want to make the same mistake like they made with Penn State. If Emmert hadn’t jumped out there like he did, NCAA probably… Read more »
I confess I would not recognize SEC Commissioner Sankey if he was walking down Franklin Street wearing an “I’m Greg Sankey” t-shirt. I did google him before replying. I don’t see the resemblance to “Sweet Baby” James but I will allow it. . I am duly noting your well-thought out prediction of How/When The Fat Lady Sings. I must warn you that the odds of wining the “called-it right” trophy are slimmer than Lee Dedman or Chuck Nevitt or Hack Tyson. Hows THAT for covering my bases with Infamous Triangle-area skinny guys? Personally, I think you are relying way too… Read more »
Video (not the link) appears to be out of order…
There’s are some “floundering N&O ran out of $$$” jokes in there someplace.
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I just tried it and it worked just fine. ???
We could get an idea about the results of the SHOWDOWN in MUSIC CITY in about 8 weeks or so.
I have no prediction on the outcome except that whatever the NCAA penalties are will be appealed by UNC.
I also predict that Jay Bilas will continue to try and muddy up the water with his tweets claiming that the NCAA manufactured a case vs UNC. I also predict that true blue Koolade guzzlers will accept Jay’s messages as a 5th GOSPEL.
There are more than a few Lower Level TruBlus that would kiss Christian Laettner on the lips if he came out on their side.