The UNCCH Scandal – VS – The DaVinci Code

DaVinci Code
BobLee
May22/ 2017

The Great UNCCH Scandal (TGU) – VS – The DaVinci Code ….. A BLSays Exclusive.

During the 10-week recovery from my retina surgery, I could not drive. The BobLeeMobile sat idle. When I tried to start it the battery was dead…. Duh. A $140 new battery and I was good to go. A lesson learned…. “use it or lose it”.

Lets apply that strategy to discussion of everyone’s favorite Great Athletic/Academic Scandal i.e. The Great Unpleasantness at UNCCH? With that poor horse still on life-support, I can’t risk losing my razor keen analytical skills…. let’s beat it once again.

The timeline for this Keystone Kops Kaper looks like a plate of spaghetti. We are approaching the 4th, 5th or 28th “deadline” for UNC to respond to a response to a response? NCAA LOIC (Lack of Institutional Control) allegation #12 or #23 ??? Some research geek with the local chapter of ABC (Anybody But Carolina) has the correct chronology.

The NCAA critiquing ANYONE for “lack of control” redefines hypocrisy. ….. “pots and kettlesBeach Party”.

I recall “Young Marvin” Austin (who recently joined AARP and applied for MediCare) hitting SEND from some South Beach debauchery straight out of a Ballers episode…. during the Carter Administration, wasn’t it?

 

Then Humpty Dumpty fell out of the rafters of Dean’s Dome and went SPLATT. “All the king’s horses and all the king’s men” and more high-paid lawyers and PR hacks than there are banners in those rafters have been working feverishly to sweep Humpty’s mess under any rug they can find at around a $1,000/hour… but who’s counting?

The last $$$ tally had the TGU Cover-Up Costs at upwards of 18,000,000…. Or is 18,000,000 the N&O’s Money“official” tally of the number of derelicts and brain-dead hippies at “Bully” Barber’s latest Hoot&Hate ? Ask Jim Goodmon’s toadie Peter Anlyan.

…. $20,000,000 is what former Dean Smith guard Jim Delany received as a “bonus” for negotiating a Lollapalooza TV deal for the 14-members of The Big Ten. “14 members of Big Ten” – a fellow could get confused.

I cleverly put UNCCH Scandal in the title of this opus…. So 18,000,000 could be the # of moths attracted to this cyber flame. “Nekkid Cheerleaders” only gets about 5,000 by comparison.

With Blondie out chasing bunny rabbits across our front lawn with her new Mother’s Day chainsaw; I had “a vision” while eating pimento cheese and Bread&Butter pickles on Triscuits. Bear with me here….

Head In SandOne of the lingering “How Comes” of TGU has been WHY otherwise reasonable adults of a Tar Heel persuasion are unable to accept the FACT that Dear Old Alma Mater screwed up REALLY REALLY BAD. UNBELIEVABLY REALLY BAD…. close enough to DEATH PENALTY BAD that one can smell DEATH PENALTY with just a slight breeze

NOTE: Not everyone of “a Tar Heel persusion” is reasonable or adult or capable of rational thought; but there are some. Those “some” are today’s focus.

The simplest excuse is they are in a terminal state of knee-walking drunk on Carolina Way W(h)ine. Their self-images tied to semi-literate 18 y/os. I have another theory.

The date that dear sweet & lovable Duo of “Deb & Burgess” kicked off their little “lets do something to help Saint Coach Smith’s less academically motivated young men” Plan a/k/a SCAM has been carbon-dated to around 1992. Saint Coach Smith retired in October of 1997. Five years into the eligibility scam.

In addition to being The Greatest Human Being in The History of Human Beings (?) Saint Coach Smith was the poster saint for “micro-managing”. In addition to turning Gatorade into wine, enabling the blind to walk…. and the lame to see, Saint Coach Smith knew EVERYTHING ABOUT EVERYTHING that went on within his basketball program. OR did he?

Here comes the Dual Conundrum…. EITHER:
(1) Saint Smith did NOT know about the Eligibility Scam. He was NOT All-Knowing…. Omniscient…. Or capable of beating UCLA in The Wooden Era. ….. He was (shudder) A MORTAL MAN! ….. OR

(2) Saint Smith DID know all about the Eligibility Scam, condoned it, and simply pulled “a Sgt Schultz” from 1992 to 1997 and beyond. Ergo he was not only MORTAL, he was pathologically dishonest. Grounds for (shudder again) Un-Sainthood.

Saint Coach Smith either knew or didn’t know but either way he was NOT what he allowed his naïve “true believing” disciples to believe he was. DEAN SMITH WAS FLAWED…. And not just “smoking like a chimney”, and occasionally “driving under the influence and above posted limits”.Kipling

An incredible analogy to Rudyard Kipling’s The Man Who Would Be King applies here.

Back to those “some” rational adults of a Tar Heel persuasion who still insist on “going ostrich” since Humpty Dumpty fell from those rafters so many many years ago.

For a “DD Lower Level” Tar Heel to accept that DEAN SMITH was not only “just a man” but an ethically flawed man guilty of overseeing a crooked program for AT LEAST five years is equivalent to asking a Born Again Christian to deny both the Virgin Birth AND Resurrection.

Coincidentally, Coach Smith did both of those too when he fell under the theological influence of one Robert Seymour. But that’s a story for another day.

That Saint Dean Smith even “might not” have been what one believed in one’s heart of hearts is a Life-altering moment for a Carolina Way Wino.

Spending $20,000,000+ to preserve that myth is vintage DaVinci Code plot material. …. with self-righteous Rams Clubbers as the obsessed Knights Templar.  Is this “rich” or WHAT! …. Dan Brown – Dan Kane ?  

Awesome Personal Anecdote: Three years ago I had a very private conversation with a quite prominent UNC Alum. A name many would recognize. He had become addicted to this website and to my uncanny ability to cut to the chase AND…. to make him giggle.

The discussion de jour was “what did Dean know and when did he know it”. My friend was confident Dean knew absolutely nothing about it. “Oh” I said, “and how well did you know Coach Smith.” “Not at all… I never met him” he replied. “So your total confidence in his integrity and sterling character is based on …….. ?” …. “What ‘they’ say…. ’” he replied as his own words went KERPLUNK.  In his profession such a blind assumption is a No No.  I touched the tip of my nose and softly replied “Bingo”.cookies

“Damn you BobLee” he muttered as he nudged a plate of warm homemade chocolate chip cookies across the table towards me. …… One more misguided soul rescued from the clutches of blissful ignorance.

I hope this helps you in further untangling this Gordian Knot of a Scandal.

##

At 8:28 AM Monday a Major Game-Changer landed in Ye Olde In-Box.  KABOOM!  Complete details will follow later this week.  If you thought “the designated hitter” and “long pants” were cataclysmic to The National Pasttime – Just Wait!

##

AgentPierce is now being compared to Thomas Paine, Patrick Henry and Nathan Hale.  Other than Nathan Hale being lynched by the British, this is all good…. we think.   LINK

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NCSU68Grad
NCSU68Grad
4 years ago

UNC has told the NCAA that no student athletes had or received any special arrangements
Need a readership poll to determine which of the three great lies will be replaced by the UNC response
Dial 1-888-TGU-LIES and cast your vote for removal. Press the appropriate key as follow to remove the lesser of the frauds.
1>>>The check is in the mail
2>>>I will not “blank” in your mouth.
3>>>I did not have sex with young lady, Ms. Lewinski

wolfdon
wolfdon
4 years ago

Where did Swoff fit into this chronology ? …..I know he is put off by the bias within the COI on this matter, may be he is a saint also.

NCSU68Grad
NCSU68Grad
4 years ago
Reply to  wolfdon

Swoff be the one that convinced the UNC Faculty Senate to endorse AFAM and also to con the UNC Admin into adding same.
Swoff personally and irrecoverably eradicated all hard and digital documents linking him to such prior to leaving UNC.
Anyone that purportedly has clandestine copies of such will become the Seth Rich of Chapel Hill

OldWuf Vet
OldWuf Vet
4 years ago
Reply to  BobLee

You probably weren’t aware but us wolfies scrambled a couple of drones when we realized that you crossed the DMZ today. We were prepared to jam all computers and TV’s in Chapel Hill with a never seen primitive recording of the mythical 1924 National Championship Game one of our computer engineers reconstructed. Figured if the TruBlues were distracted by further illusions of their greatness, then you could make your escape. We’ve got your 6. I’m sure you’re more concerned about character assassination than physical violence. We’ve found over the years that we’re more likely to be attacked by the French… Read more »

Former96Heel
Former96Heel
4 years ago

Wow. I gotta start wearing an incontinence device reading this. If ORW were to somehow come down with cancer, Skinner would have a team of writers try to one-up that famous ESPY speech.
.
‘come on Roy, channel that Coke ad. Think about your momma’s hard earned dime. They’ll name the Student Academic Center for you if you nail this’

Former96Heel
Former96Heel
4 years ago
Reply to  BobLee

Skipper, not Skinner, correct.

Gary.74
Gary.74
4 years ago

I’ve been a loyal BLS fan for going on 15+ years so I have historical context. With that in mind, BL, will “Art & Burgess’ Bathwater” have the shelf life of “Micki’s Whorehouse” ? BTW… I still use that one.

NCSU77
NCSU77
4 years ago
Reply to  BobLee

You just said out loud what a lot of people were thinking. Look at the response to your column. I often wondered where this part of the story was in the coverage. As I recall, it was never brought up by any of the “learned” journalist in our area. Perhaps it was just too sensitive and issue for them. I dared to breach the subject while my father-in-law was pontificating about the TGU. The ensuing “discussion” was not pretty. It was then I realized he drank the Kool Aid a long time ago and there is no antidote. I am… Read more »

Doug
Doug
4 years ago
Reply to  BobLee

I just had a vision. I might be wrong. Please tell me I am but eventually the DES legacy will fade somewhat only to be replaced with ORW worship. Oh my!!

DrVinnyboombatz
DrVinnyboombatz
4 years ago
Reply to  Doug

ORW will leave a legacy with the NCAA more than likely.
If the COI does it’s job, then ORW will be the only coach to EVER win ONE championship and LOSE TWO in the same calendar year.

Mr.X.88
Mr.X.88
4 years ago

BobLee, I know you joke about it because thats your style but …. this time you’ve committed the sacrilege of “pissin’ on their Pope” with that bunch. How do you really handle it?

MaryMc.Shelby
MaryMc.Shelby
4 years ago

You mention in an earlier comment reply that Art Chansky wears a vial of Burgess McSwain’s bathwater on a chain around his neck. Is that true?

Baltimoreheel
Baltimoreheel
4 years ago
Reply to  BobLee

I am not on the bandwagon that DES was a deity since he was a diehard lib. I met and was honored to speak with him twice and found him to be a sincere caring person. This confirms to me his love and concern for his players making the right decisions not only for the program but for their lives. I do not believe he saw this “Afro-American Studies” cirriculum as an issue. This was a program set up and designed to appease the black students of the University. He was the first coach to recruit a black player in… Read more »

Baltimoreheel
Baltimoreheel
4 years ago
Reply to  BobLee

I’m sorry I didn’t make my point very well. I don’t believe he had any idea that the curriculum was what it was. I don’t think he realized its ridiculousness as a college curriculum because that was not his role. He thought the “idea” was good but had no knowledge of its flawed execution. Had he known what we know now I feel certain he would have taken action with his players. I mean he even didn’t want fans standing and waving their arms behind the goal posts when the opposition was shooting free throws. I can’t believe he would… Read more »

Lance A Boyle
Lance A Boyle
4 years ago

One thing that we do know that Dean knew, because he sent a helicopter to check it out … David Thompson’s driveway was paved by NC State alums.

Steve
Steve
4 years ago

Outstanding article ! Mike Chandler’s comment was as well.

Doug
Doug
4 years ago
Reply to  BobLee

Great Subject and timing on the article too. May is Sweeps month. TGU always delivers. ?

JD
JD
4 years ago

When will the TGU be blamed on Russian influence therefore absolving the liberal do-gooders at UNCCH of all crimes?

Former96Heel
Former96Heel
4 years ago
Reply to  BobLee

I did see Wainstein’s name in a list of potential FBI heads. I guess 1k/hour gigs must not grow on trees if he were to even consider letting his name be tossed in

Zeke93
Zeke93
4 years ago

BobLee, this column is like epic movies – Godfather I – Casino – Lonesome Dove. I’ve read it three times so far and finds new “killer lines” each time. Have you sold the screen rights yet?

GrahamPacker
GrahamPacker
4 years ago

GrahamPacker,

Damn Bob Lee! Those great Duke docs really opened your eyes. You have been slowly sensing the “light” for several years. Now you can clearly see what many of us Pack fans have seen for years. Congratulations!

Former96heel
Former96heel
4 years ago

Is it horrible or just self-loathing to be wishing in some small part for the dp?

It has zero chance of ever happening, but it is the best chance for the sham that is college sports to be righted. It’s similar to hitching up to the Trump train knowing the storm may be just what can clear the sewer.

Doug
Doug
4 years ago

You and Mike Chandler pretty much nailed it. For reasonable Tar Heel fans, (there are a few) even hints or discussions from many in news and sports media that UNC could face the NCAA death penalty is chilling. I don’t believe THAT will happen but even the mention of, or consideration of it should wake up even die hard deniers. But it won’t.

DrVinnyboombatz
DrVinnyboombatz
4 years ago
Reply to  BobLee

A monetary fine is no punishment for a wealthy school like UNC. Post season bans and vacated wins must happen or the NCAA is toast.

Ron S.
Ron S.
4 years ago

Dean Smith never once reported a NCAA violation in 36 years. That right there tells us how dishonest he was. Any coach will tell you it’s impossible to go that long without a violation….even Roy.

David K
David K
4 years ago

What was the graduation rate of his players during his tenure?

Mike Chandler
Mike Chandler
4 years ago

Jokes and exaggerations often serve to reveal overlooked truths. All the jokes about “Saint Dean”, not to mentional the long-running hagiography about him by folks like Chansky, expose something that is troubling: the reverence and fervor expressed by true-believers and praisers / defenders of all things UNC find their source in a sort of idolatrous worship of UNC sports in general and UNC basketball in particular. As you have noted, this zealotry is so deep-rooted and so tied to some fans’ sense of identity and self-worth that it is literally impossible for them to believe, let alone admit, that UNC,… Read more »

NCSU68Grad
NCSU68Grad
4 years ago
Reply to  Mike Chandler

Wonderful post… Let not those caught up in the DES was a SAINT forget that his “Regime” of Coaches and Grad Coaches and Managers and “OTHERS” also engages in Human Trafficing. The Sweet Carolines were “Voluntary”…like the drug dealers that gave out free drugs. Once they were part of the “In Circle”, they were then forced to bring in others and go deeper into the abyss. Now in fairness to DES, the Sweet Carolines were also dispersed or handed out for FB stars. I suppose that there were no “Alternative” lifestyle Sweet Carols for recruits of the Michael Sams persuasion.… Read more »

fayettewuf
fayettewuf
4 years ago

IMHO Smith did not see the creation of an AFAM curriculum as perverting the system nor cheating. He coached too long. IIRC Smith was a math major and probably a pretty logical thinker. He contrived a very successful system using fairly talented players who really were students. When he had players like Rusty Clark, Larry Miller, Bob Lewis, or Charlie Scott, he did not need too much cooperation from the faculty (there are jock sniffing professors everywhere but most don’t give a damn about sports). At some point, I think, he realized that to stay successful, he was going to… Read more »

ncsu1987
ncsu1987
4 years ago

Tarspartan’s point IS a great one. Among my friends, those who move away from the Raleigh area more than, say 200 miles, seem to calm down, and the calming effect of distance is, at minimum, linearly proportional to distance. And it’s exactly as you say, BL – it all has to do with the fact that you don’t have 8 or nine yahoos pushing your buttons the day after. There’s a small minority, with personal happiness firmly tied to athletic success, for whom there is essentially no hope for substantive change. For the rest of us, on both sides, distance… Read more »

PrinceAlbert
PrinceAlbert
4 years ago

You’d better try and arrange to get Danny Reagan and his pretty partner (Blue Bloods) to come and take care of you after all the Saint Dean admirers that are going to be after you. Great article.

TarSpartan
TarSpartan
4 years ago

I have decided that one’s reasonableness about TGU is often proportional to the distance one lives from the alma mater. I graduated on Mother’s Day 1997, made it to East Lansing for grad school the following Thursday, and have only made it back to Chapel Hill three times since. Then again, part of my sense of proportion is due to my other alma mater being guilty of holding 10k+ student riots after a Final Four loss, turning a blind eye to drunk driving hijinks of National Championship winners, and recruiting young men guilty of various degrees of assault. At least… Read more »

ncsu1987
ncsu1987
4 years ago

Bob Lee, “misguided soul…saver”. I like it.

Undoubtedly the souls that you save are better for it, but I suspect you don’t get many thanks. And you got a literal LOL with the Kipling reference. First time I’ve heard that analogy applied, and it really works well.

NCSU68Grad
NCSU68Grad
4 years ago

GOD FORBID….I offer the following. My Red NCSU Shorts may self ignite and cause harm to the surrounding territory, WHICH, like your car battery, is not used as frequently as it once was….BUT, I am as good ONCE as I EVER WAS… Dean (enter title of your choice) Smith KNEW that an “Afro Friendly” Curriculum would make it “less stressful” for the majority of the members of his team. The Boys at the U of K had done done the groundwork and the NCAA and the UK BOG was ON BOARD. Johnny Swofford was in his prime and had just… Read more »

DrVinnyboombatz
DrVinnyboombatz
4 years ago
Reply to  BobLee

This is one of your best columns on TGU.
Please keep them coming.

DrVinnyboombatz
DrVinnyboombatz
4 years ago
Reply to  BobLee

You may very well be right on the bounty meter.
Mary Willingham and Dan Kane have had death threats.
Have you had any yet?
There are some things that take more guts than what you wrote here in this state but not many.
I’ll give you one example: Publishing a picture of Mohammed with a red circle and a red slash across it in Islamabad, Afghanistan would take more guts than telling the truth about DES in NC.

Puddinhead
Puddinhead
4 years ago
Reply to  BobLee

This is silly. The ONE thing DES will get a “you got us there” nod on from this Wolfpacker is the pure evil genius behind putting his sham curriculum into a course of study that no right-minded human being would touch with a 10-foot pole in this overly PC environment we live in today. I have forever envisioned Sofford, Roy and Dean sitting around a table in a dark room laughing through the clouds of smoke lingering about while squint-eyed pointing their cigars at one another saying: “AfAm studies… now that’s a good one.”

MaHa
MaHa
4 years ago

BL, Not to speak ill of the departed but Burgess was from my home town and was neither sweet or lovable. She was way way out and totally soaked in the cool aid and would do anything for the sainted one which she apparently did. MAHA.

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