SB LI… What I Saw.

Super Bowl LI
BobLee
February07/ 2017

SB LI… What I Saw.

Has EVERYONE in your daily universe expressed their considerable opinion on EVERY miniscule aspect of SB LI (that’s “Super Bowl Lie” for those of you in Dogpatch USA). …. Your Crazy Uncle LeRoy … his 3rd wife LaVerne … that bag boy at Kroger’s with the severe overbite … the weekend weather bimbo on EyeWitness News Channel 34 … have they all pontificated on All Things Super Bowl Lie? If not I can wait another day or so.

After L years – 50 years for you not-Romans – that football game that Lamar Hunt named after his grandson’s bouncy ball over a half century ago has now penetrated to the deepest inner core of The Planet.

In Rambo III or IV, “John” has retreated to a remote Tibetan monastery to help the monks install a hot tub or some such, when Colonel Trautman (“Luke”Rambo from The Real McCoys) recruits him to get tortured with a blow torch by Russians before once again blowing up a Russkie helicopter gunship with a slingshot. That remote Tibetan monastery now has a Wild Wings R Us franchise so even in deepest Tibet they argued “Did Lady Gaga say ‘under God’ or not?” … she DID but don’t let the Truth stop a good food fight between monks

If I say anything over the next several 100 words you have not heard umpteen versions of… yell GERONIMO and I’ll highlight it.

I watched SB LI from the exact same chair in the exact same room on the exact same 32” Samsung HDTV that I watched all those other really really exciting Championships over the past twelve months. It has been a quite unbelievable string of quite exciting sports events ….

Villanova vs RoyzBoyz …. LeBron vs Steph …. Cubs vs Chief Wahoo …. Dabos vs The Nicks …. and now Trump’s BFF vs That Team with the QB NOT The G.O.A.T.  Even go back to that KC Royals World Series Game 5 vs Mets. …. In my not short lifetime I cannot recall a series of Humdingers to match these. Can you?

NOTE: Albert, have you figured out yet what GOAT means? It’s hip sports lingo for Greatest Of All Time. Millennial Hipster Sports Talk Guys like to have Greatest Of All Time debates with their very very angry mouth-breathing audiences. GOAT debates are guaranteed to do that.

The quickest and bloodiest sports debate of late is How awful of a human being is Joe Buck? Human hairballs with visceral hatred for Joe Buck (or Joe Buckany sportscaster) do NOT occupy positions of responsibility in civilized societies. FWIW…. America is no longer considered “a civilized society” so Joe Buck-Haters are liable to be anywhere. FWIW2…. People who “hate Joe Buck” tend to “hate” a long list of other stuff.  No surprise there.

So… back to Lady GaGa (“LG”). My creds as a concert / music critic are – my concert experiences over the past 40 years = Neil Diamond in Dallas in 1982 …. Being a security guard for Paul McCartney at Carter-Finley in 1990 …. and Scotty McCreary at PNC several years ago courtesy of none-other-than THE Bob Kennel. Suffice to say I am not Concert-savvy.

My daughter is a BIG Taylor Swift Swifty so I know that TS is among that handful of mega-bazillion $$$ concert superstars along with this Lady Gaga person. That whozit that rode the mechanical elephant at SB L – Katy Perry ?? – is in that handful too. No clue where Neil Diamond ranks these days.

I watched “LG” for the same reason you did…. if you did. Will LG drop from the sky wearing a burka and one of those pointy pink beanie things screaming F*** Trump and proceed to set fire to a lifesize replica of KellyAnne Conway? She did not. I was glad she did not. A lot of HateTrumpers are not glad she did not.  Even Lady GaGa can’t please everyone I suppose.

A local sports talk guy and I Twitter-jousted about the above. The e-conversation was strained. I don’t think he likes me…. sigh, sniff.

ASIDE:  How many of you think Kennel has one of those cute (?) little pointy HateTrump caps he wears while doing hot yoga?

There actually was a worldwide Twitter debate ongoing during the first half that LG was going to perform a Satanic Ritual. I could not understand A Up With PeopleSINGLE WORD of any of her songs. Literally not A SINGLE WORD. FWIW3… I have not understood a single word of ANY SB halftime show since Up With People sang I’d Like To Teach The World To Sing back in SB III or IV.

Back To The Game… In each of those Humdinger Thrillas noted above, I had no vested emotional attachment to either participating team. I don’t “bet” so really it did not matter to me who won. Yes… that applies to ‘Nova vs RoyzBoyz. My level of estrangement from “over there” is quite complete.

I watched each of those championship games only interested in the High Drama as it unfolded. It is a healthy way to be… I think. I appreciate that most of humanity DOES get emotionally involved. I used to… I like “my way now” better.

I appreciate that a significant % of fans HATE Tom Brady because (list standard Top Ten Hate Tom Brady Reasons… with/without “Trump Factor”). I don’t and “my buddy Art” doesn’t. Art loves Tom Brady.  Same with Bill Belichek. I reserve “love” for family – kittens – Brunswick stew… and reruns of RoadHouse.

Did you know there is a cult of PatriotHaters who want them “impeached” for having too many short white wide receivers? ESPN will probably have Jemele Hill conduct a Town Hall on “How many little white guys are too many in The NFL?”

The Did Patriots Win … or Did Falcons Choke debate is out there stirring up the mouth-breathers. I just thought it was A Great Comeback PERIOD. Had NE missed either 2-pt try, they lose.

I’m fine with anointing Tom Brady as GOAT. I’m fine with anointing Bill Belichek as GOAT. I’m fine with Terrell Owens NOT getting into NFL HoF… or if he eventually does. I’m fine with Joe Buck having “stubble” or being clean-shaven. I think Erin Andrews is way over-rated for whatever it is she does; but she is probably a nice person so I’m not going to let it bother me.

I did not have a favorite commercial. I have never shopped at an 84 Lumber store and I probably won’t now. That Falcons’ owner Arthur Bank is co-founder of Home Depot is ironic I think.

Albert, when I figure out what a “mic drop” is, or “throwing shade” I will let you know.

A Baby Boomer’s Lament: More and more and more with each passing year…. I am no longer anyone’s “target demographic” when it comes to advertising and product marketing. Each year in early February I am reminded of that. I’m OK with that too…

###

Joaquin de AlmeidaThere is a new TV series – Training Dayon CBS on Thursdays. Based on Denzel’s movie of the same name. It is Lethal Weapon on steroids…. rogue cop (white guy) & naïve idealist rookie partner (black guy) battle very eeevil cartel baddies in LA back alleys and fancy digs.  The eeevil sadistic cartel boss is played by Joaquin de Almeida. You don’t recognize his name but when you see him you will say “OMG It’s That Guy Again”. Joaquin ALWAYS plays sadistic cartel drug kingpins. If you’ve seen Clear & Present Danger 23 times like I have, you know Joaquin. Watch Training Day just to see Joaquin again.

###

AgentPierce wants Betsy DeVos to “kick butt and ………. by Friday” – CLICK

BobLee
  • tin foil hat heel Reply
    2 months ago

    LG was singing about poking someones face or something along those lines. Wouldnt it be nice if THE LEAGUE would bring someone in nobody really knows.

    Falcons just blew it plain and simple, but TB did not use the Robert Johnson clause as he already is Satan incarnate.

    • BobLee Reply
      2 months ago

      The NFL has made it clear the past 8-10 years that the SB 1/2 Time is intended for a totally different audience than the game itself. Not a bad strategy to broaden the potential advertiser pool. I’m sure Gaga has A LOT of fans worldwide… just none that I intermingle with on a regular basis. NOW we get The NBA rammed down our throats if we allow it. I hold off until the Finals in July. After Steph Curry yesterday, I may extend my “not watch” into August.

  • BigAlSouth Reply
    3 months ago

    I have but one explanation for the Patriots amazing, odds-defying comeback win against the Falcons, and it went something like this: At halftime, Patriots QB Tom Brady is seen sitting in a corner, all by himself.

    “OK, Lucifer. You win. I really want that fifth ring. You help me win in overtime and my soul is all yours . . .”.

    • BobLee Reply
      3 months ago

      I think Lucifer receives a LOT of such “offers” during big sports events …. and on Election Days. 🙂

  • Myowngrandpaw Reply
    3 months ago

    I did not see any panic on the NE sideline. I did not see any coaches berate players or other coaches. I did not see players berate each other. VERY business like the WHOLE game. Lots of emotion AFTER the game. To be fair, I saw the same demeaner on the Atlanta side as well. Atlanta showed a little more exuberance after some big plays, but nothing over the top. Refreshing. It looked like a PROFESSIONAL game. For a nice change. The stars never once made it about themselves even after making spectacular plays. No whining at refs. Maybe a sharp look but that was it. Even when helmuts got locked up, players smiled about it. NFL ratings would increase ratings if teams played PROFESSIONALLY like these two teams. Great example for rest of league.

    • BobLee Reply
      3 months ago

      I admit I was kinda nervous during the Nat Anthem and other pre-game stuff. I suspect the camera crews were on high alert. Belichek runs a pretty tight ship. Don’t want to get crossways with him.

  • Ric '73 Reply
    3 months ago

    RE: The mystery of the missing jersey. Why is anyone surprised that ANYTHING was stolen in a locker room full of media types?

    • BobLee Reply
      3 months ago

      That non-story should dominate the talk shows until the next “thug-alete” alert pops up.

  • James.E.75 Reply
    3 months ago

    BL, I can’t tell you how many times one of your “out of leftfield” references hits me right between the eyes. You just did it again with “the drug cartel guy”. You are absolutely right… he ALWAYS plays “the evil drug cartel kingpin” and I always tell my wife “Theres that guy again”.

    • BobLee Reply
      3 months ago

      What can I say James? I am “Everyman”… well a LOT of’em at least. I know of at least three movies / TV series where Joaquin plays the exact character, not by name, but by role. As soon as you see him you say “It’s That Guy”. In this new Training Day series Joaquin just got out of prison and returns to take back “his territory” – LA. The psycho white cop (think Martin Riggs) has other ideas. This psycho white cop truly is PSYCHO. It is as bloody violent as any “network” show I’ve ever seen. This dude and Ray Donovan would get along.

  • Robert Kennel Reply
    3 months ago

    BL, as usual an interesting take on the Super Bowel. Didn’t have a strong preference except for “whoever was behind”. Thus it was a great game and feel good for GOAT ( he earned it) as well as NC State rookie left guard and deep backup QB. Rings don’t come around often.
    .
    Also read your juxtaposed AP article, and BL much better written and understandable😎
    .
    Actually enjoyed Lady GaGa as being much better than expected. During her closing “throw down the Mike” and jump, don’t know if she maintained the pass into the fold in her stomach to the ground.
    .
    Finally, for all the “conservatism” you claim, you been much too “liberal” in your stretching BK’s personality vis-a-vis NC State. Just a good New Bern homeboy😋

    • BobLee Reply
      3 months ago

      Promoting you as “a regular column character” is an old columnist trick. Lewis Grizzard had several such including his dog Catfish. You’re my “Catfish” BK.
      .
      AP has a column coming up on New Educ Secty Betsy DeVos – “Quick Betsy VOUCHERS VOUCHERS VOUCHERS” – that oughta get your back teeth agrinding.
      .
      I meant to give a shout-out to the two Wuff-Patriots … as well TO’B’s Matty Ice too.

      • Irondoc Reply
        3 months ago

        Did Mr. Kennel intentionally call it the “Super Bowel” or just a typo?

        • BobLee Reply
          3 months ago

          I left it just like I received it. He IS THE Bob Kennel. Who am I to question TBK? 🙂

  • Porcophile Reply
    3 months ago

    I was pulling for the Falcons to avenge the burning of Atlanta, but it looks as if that will have to wait. It was one hell of a game.

    • BobLee Reply
      3 months ago

      Atlanta remembers Sherman like State fans remember former ACC Referee Jim Knight. 🙂

      • Myowngrandpaw Reply
        3 months ago

        UNC brought Jim Knight back from the dead during UVA-UNC game. Just to haunt State fans a few more years. Funny how Jim Knight “chose” to have a heart attack during a game between medical schools🚑🚑🚑

        • BobLee Reply
          3 months ago

          I was at the Jim Knight Died game in Kenan … and several years later when the same Jim Knight reversed the TA’s knee call on the goal line. I used to do an embellished version of all that on the civic club circuit. How well the story went over dependent upon the partisan majority in the room. 🙂

  • NCSU68Grad Reply
    3 months ago

    Comments..
    I spent Sunday AM getting poked and prodded and finally the doctor came back in, with mask, and advised me that my “allergic reaction to mulching the winter leaves” was the FLU. Such a punishment, I would not even wish on BK or his lot….I have NOT added Rev BB to that, but due to his overall physical condition, it could be fatal, so I will publicly state he is NOT on my list for infestation.
    .
    Watching and snoozing and coughing and whatever the game was interesting. I had the feeling that TB might prove himself to be a GOAT and that we would go for “records” (like VP Pence voting for Cabinet Appointee DeVos). Did not have a favorite. There are 2 NCSU players for the Pats and NONE for the Birds. But, you gotta think that TOB was proud of his boy, Matt Ryan.
    .
    Lady GagGag was a hoot. The “Jump” was a theaterical stunt and she did not even come close to the level of daredevil lie Elizabeth Gardner rapelling down a Raleigh Skyscraper. I could not, either understand her babble, but did not notice any walking female genitalia or Alec Baldwin impressions of the “Donald” (whom MOST call POTUS). The fact that she had a DOUBLE cable harness was extra protection and also for her to “land” on her SPOT. Probably safer than an elevator in the Granville Towers.
    .
    ORW and the Press and the WORLD seem to have forgotten that Houston, by a 2/3’s MAJORITY, repealed the Charlotte LBTQX Bill. Funny, the NFL Commish did NOT hold that against them. ORW needs to learn a little about such before shooting off his Andy Griffin Mouth. BUT, that will NOT change.
    It is Belichick…..I was surprised at the spelling but checked it out during the game. Arthur Blanc seemed to have lost his “Rhythm” toward the end of the second half. His third wife will have to treat him special to get over the loss. The parade in Boston today had some “snow graffiti” that was worthy of the Women’s March….
    .
    Got an email with a picture….”Thousands of potty mouthed women with orange and purple hair dressed up as vagina’s demanding dignity for their gender…..” Only in America….and only funded by Soros….

    • BobLee Reply
      3 months ago

      Good Old George S. If you had a nickel for every time the word “Soros” has EVER appeared in The N&O you could not make change for a dime. … Houston’s restrictions on Trany urination never did get mentioned… funny, huh?

  • UNCBlue Reply
    3 months ago

    Brady and Bellichek are just simply awesome. A record many will not seen broken in our lifetime.

    Joaquin is also awesome. (I wonder if he voted for Trump?)

    • BobLee Reply
      3 months ago

      Joaquin “rocks” 😜😜 ….

  • Doug Reply
    3 months ago

    The Falcons reminded me of the old bull and young bull resting on a hill watching a herd of heifers below. The youngster wanted to run down there fast a “stir up” one. The old bull wanted to descend very slowly and stir em all up. What I saw was a tired Falcon defense after 3 quarters and an old (in football years) experienced bull that came to play for 4. Pardon me. 5.

    Joe Buck is fine since Lindsey Nelson is gone. I liked the Humpty Dumpty tax commercial…. egg yolk oozing from the multiple cracks. ORW is….ORW.

    The breaking news of today is that Steve Sarkisian is the new OC of the Falcons.

    • BobLee Reply
      3 months ago

      Who will Nick hire as OC du jour ??

      • Doug Reply
        3 months ago

        In the press conference Coach Quinn praised Sarkisian’s willingness to take risks on offense. Needless to say, Saban will put the reins on frisky play calling no matter who’s hired in his lifelong quest to win every game 7-0.

        • Doug Reply
          3 months ago

          Oh! Chip Kelly is the latest coach in need of rehabilitation,

          • BobLee
            3 months ago

            Chip seems the early favorite but The Nickster might surprise everyone.

  • Pete.J Reply
    3 months ago

    No comment on “what Roy said”?

    • BobLee Reply
      3 months ago

      Actually I was in a nice little Twitter dust-up about What Roy Said … this time.
      .
      For anyone who hasn’t heard, in his post-ND game remarks, UNC HBBC ‘Ol Roy” Williams blurtily lamented that Greensboro will NEVER ever host an ACC Basketball game EVER AGAIN because of that stoopid HB2. Even long time defenders of Stoopid Crap Roy Says were flumoxed. He was about to add that “Elvis is alive and living in the cart shed at Old Chatham Golf Club” before Kirschy cut his mic cord.
      .
      I am of the opinion that HB2 “overreached” and probably should be “modified” but I agree with the reason it exists PLUS I actually know the circumstances of how it came to be. Ol’ Roy as is often the case “don’t know JACK” about pretty much anything of a socio-political nature especially HB2. He cannot spell HB2 if you spot him the “H” and the “B”. I hear Roy will lecture on BREXIT next week before a full United Nations General Assembly. Look up Clueless Dolt in any dictionary. There be Roy Williams.
      .
      Is that what you were hoping for?

      • Doug Reply
        3 months ago

        I think we all understand what Roy’s HB2 moment is all about. Those daggum NCAA regional games in NC are a better path to the promised land (entitlement for Blue Kool-Aidaholics) of the Final Four.

        • BobLee Reply
          3 months ago

          I figured it meant Roy is now recruiting incontinent transgenders. Who knew? Like Roy has a clue what “incontinent” means !!

          • JD
            3 months ago

            Roy is such a hoot. He is about as smart as those mouth breathers on the monkey boards discussing GOAT status whenever he opens his mouth about politics. Wait until he finds out that NORTH CAROLINA voted for Donald J Trump.

          • BobLee
            3 months ago

            He (ORW) is a fount of fodder for me …. may he forever be so. 🤡

  • BobLee Reply
    3 months ago

    We don’t keep track of such things but the 70 Reader Comments for No Snowflakes On The Brickyard is probably a record of some sort. On behalf of hopefully many readers… “Reader Comments” are a vital part of the ongoing popularity and exponential growth of this website.
    .
    We sorta kinda figured the subject would incite feedback. We intend to “incite feedback” more often.

    • DrVinnyboombatz Reply
      2 months ago

      I would like to predict the subject matter of one of your next columns.
      Does Bubba speaking to the media sound like a good subject for this site?

      • BobLee Reply
        2 months ago

        There are dozens of websites devoted to the minute-by-minute-by-decade progression of TGU. I’ve grown weary of chronicling every “Damn Dan’s latest” and/or “Bubba saids”. There are too many other topics that interest me more. I’m sure “what Bubba said to CBSSports” was calculated for some sinister purpose in preparation for the next NCAA appearance or inevitable “day in court”. I will have further comment on the latest “Roy blurt” however. 🙂

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