‘Tis The Season 4 Fat Cats & Board Monkeys

Fat Cats
BobLee
November23/ 2016

‘Tis The Season 4 Fat Cats & Board Monkeys.

BobLee; are you going to talk about the Notre Dame ruling by NCAA, and how it impacts UNCCH’s TGU?  Yes, of course…. but Not Today.

It is Thanksgiving Weekend so you can count on:

….Your local TV station sending a vacuous info babe to the local airport for a story of the hassles of holiday travel. It’s the same story they do EVERY year. “Info Crowded Airportbabe @ the airport” is as much a Thanksgiving tradition as (1) green bean casserole and (2) your sister’s ne’er do well 3rd husband saying something crude and stoopid at T-dinner despite promising her he wouldn’t.

NOTE: For those of you in The Triangle, Jim Goodmon’s WRAL info-babe at RDU will blame travel congestion on Pat McCrory contesting the recent election results and, of course, on Donald Trump just because….

BUT for those obsessed with sports-related foolishness – and you know who you are.

‘Tis the season” for (1) Fat Cats to exert their bought-and-paid-for influence in Big Time College Football… and for (2) goggle-eyed board monkeys to either agree with / or violently oppose said Fat Cats and their purchased influence.

Right now:
All the national sports pundits are decrying the eeeeevil “influential boosters” at Univ of Texas for letting Charlie Strong twist in the wind.

Exactly one year ago:
All the national sports pundits were decrying the eeeeevil “influential boosters” at LSU for letting Les Miles twist in the wind.

In prior years they decried Michigan Fat Cats…. Or Southern Cal Fat Cats…. Or Auburn Fat Cats…. Or XYZ Fat Cats for influencing the fate of VERY highly paid coaches who, for whatever circumstances, have not had the on-field success they (Fat Cats) put up millions of THEIR $$$$ to bring them to their campus to produce.

In our little section of the Planet, mucho attention is on the fate of NC State’s Dave WhoFromWhere. Reports abound that he and his supervisor – AD Frau Yow – were back in August, given specific minimal expectations for on-field success that, regardless of what happens on Black Friday amid the pines, will not be met. Failure to achieve specific minimum expectations would have dire consequences.

Reports I have received from multiple off-line sources, involve high profile NCSU Fat Cats whose names are etched prominently on various facilities around NC State University. I won’t mention those names because I have no way of verifying their involvement but you can come up with your own “short list”.

One’s name gets etched on buildings by either being a war hero or writing checks with A LOT of zeros on them. Usually the latter since we haven’t had a major war lately.

Having A LOT of $$$ is a relative term. I consider myself a middle-class guy from a middle-class upbringing. The creature comforts our family Rich Peopleenjoys are adequate to our needs. We all drive Lexuses but all are “previously-owned”. We enjoy beach vacations but “rent a condo” when we do. We recently provided our daughter with the wedding of her dreams but (fortunately!) her dreams were modest by comparison to many.

There is that adage about “having no shoes” versus “having no feet”. We’ve always had shoes but they were never custom-made Eye-talian loafers.

For the dozen or so years I was a member of my alma mater’s “booster club” I was at the minimum level qualifying for a window decal and a newsletter. Since my estrangement I no longer qualify for either. I have a St Louis Cardinals decal and license plate holder. Neither of which required me to join “a booster club”.

I am a free market guy. If you want to pay “a lotta money” for a booster club membership PLUS a PSL to then buy season tickets for “your” college or pro team, I have no problem with you doing so. Same as contributing “a lotta money” to a political cause or candidate. I am not a “you should give that $$$ to a worthy charity” guy. It is YOUR $$$ to do with as you please.

 

###

Speaking of Rich Guys…. “my buddy Art Chansky” has a new book just out.     Art ChanskyArt’s new book is about UNC & Chapel Hill in The 60s – The Charlie Scott Era et al.  Art “lived it” so the book is as solid as his memory.   If you are a UNC fan… or have an ABC fan on your Christmas list you want to really piss off…. get a few copies of Art’s new book

Game Changers — Dean Smith, Charlie Scott and The Era That Transformed a Southern CollegeTown by clicking here and using the Discount Code 01DAH40.

In total books, Art now trails Danielle Steele by only 26.   In the wake of Trump’s victory, Art is frantic to flee to a condo in Cabo.   Your purchase of a book or three will help his expatriotism.

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NOTE: I just spent $900 for an iPhone 7 PLUS because I wanted a larger keyboard for texting and answering your comments. I don’t know how many Ugandan orphans I could have fed with that $900.

NC State’s notorious Hindenburg Hangar costs A LOT more than my iPhone 7 PLUS.   So did adding all those “charging stations” inHindenburg Hangar The Murphy Center (which is named for ________?) dressing rooms.  So will the “We Gotta Have One Too” IPF that whoever follows “Short List” Larry will inherit at UNCCH next year

In both cases (at NCSU, UNCCH and every other Power Five institution) there is a group of a dozen or so Mega Fat Cats (MFCs) who pony up the bulk of the bucks to make this silly recruiting bling happen. Yes there are ways for “the rank & file” to chip in their scheckles and “buy a brick” but it is those dozen or so Mega Fat Cats who always “make it happen”.

Should these Mega Fat Cats (MFCs) get “influence” in exchange for their “checks with lots of zeros”? I certainly would “want influence” if I wrote such a check. For $200/year I “wanted” my window decal and newsletter.

Should they (MFCs) have influence over hiring / firing of coaches? Should ADs and Univ Admins grab their ankles when the MFCs call with “a suggestion” or “a request”? …. Yes, they SHOULD…. IF they want those MFCs to grab their checkbooks the next time they call for the next generation of stoopid recruiting bling. There is ALWAYS a next generation of stoopid recruiting bling.

Do you think when DD cried that he “needed” The Hindenburg Hangar, WPC Poobah Bobby Purcell’s sales pitch was “so we can lose to woeful ECU and woeful Boston College and not even “spend Christmas in Shreveport”?  No, Bobby did not promise that but that’s what happened. Uh oh.

Did DD sign his “mega millions” contract without reading the fine print…. without seeing the performance fishhooks buried in it? I guarantee you Dave told Mrs Doeren after that BC loss “lets put a hold on putting in that pool”.

Big Time College FB Coaches KNOW it is ALL ABOUT Winning.  That is why they juggle hand grenades recruiting thug-aletes.  NO ONE wants thug-aletes …. but “angels don’t play football very well” so recruit thug-aletes or “lose and call the movers”.

Board monkeys tend to despise Fat Cats. Fat Cats have lots of $$$ and really nice stuff. Rank & file board monkeys tend to lead wretched lives with little or no prospects for improvement other than buying lottery tickets.

Yes…. every fan base has a middle faction of semi-normal fans twixt MFC and board monkey. Most of you who visit here occupy that realm of reality. You have opinions and you do live somewhat vicariously through the on-field success of “your team” but you maintain at least a toehold in Reality.

At NC State right now there is an odd partnership twixt Fat Cats and board monkeys. Both factions seem to want DD GONE. How his buy-out will be dealt with is not a concern of the board monkeys. Nor do the board monkeys care how much it would cost to get A BIG NAME to replace Dave.  The board monkeys simply expect the MFCs to deal with that.   Maybe they will…. AGAIN.

If board monkeys sound like 5 y/os running thru Toys ‘R Us wanting everthing regardless of the costs…. they pretty much are. It is a visual to keep in mind.Texas Rich

My Texas sources report that the MFCs among The UT Orangebloods are the Ultimate Alpha Dogs of All Fat Cats (is that a mixed metaphor or what?). In their league “millions” don’t count. It’s takes billions to buy a seat at their suite high atop Darrel Royal Stadium.  They wear Big Hats AND have lots of cattle… and oil wells… and real estate…. and trophy wives…. and diva daughters.

Out at Oregon it is a One Mega Fat Cat World – whatever Phil Knight Wants is The Rule PERIOD. It doesn’t take long to count the votes.

The humor in all this is…. For all the MFCs and all their mega $$$$s: It still comes down to a semi-literate 19 y/o catching or dropping a pass…. or a nice kid named Bambard missing a chip shot.  OUCH!

When purists complain about Big Donors owning politicians i.e. The Clinton (remember them?) Foundation…. It is no different with MFCs at your local “sleeping giant” college athletics operation.

Big $$$ Talk… Losing Coaches Walk.

###

AgentPierce is being feisty…. Again.

BobLee
  • NCSU68Grad Reply
    6 months ago

    Stock tips of the week….

    If Jimmy Sexton & Trace Armstrong team up and floats an IPO on themselves, mortgage house & load up. If reports are right, both will have a very Merry Christmas.

    Second….if the traders take Jill Stein seriously and a massive selloff results from her Fund Me recount scam, pull a Buffet and be greedy. Further evidence of the Kool Aid going digital and infecting all of HRC’s Campaign Email recipients. Instead of having Chad, the sleuths will be searching for Russian DNA in the Soros controlled voting machines. And the Libtardes thought Trump was a con man…

    • BobLee Reply
      6 months ago

      You lost me after “If Jimmy Sexton…”. I suppose the 3:53 am time stamp should have been a clue.

      • NCSU68Grad Reply
        6 months ago

        My apologies for the Navajo Code,

        I THOUGHT it was you that had posted comments about the Butcher and his Agent, THE Jimmy Sexton. Said Jimmy represents ANOTHER “Jim” as in Jimbo Fisher of FSU land. He has a huge increase due to LSU courting him. Jimmy Sexton gets a piece of that.

        Trace Armstrong is Tom Herman’s agent. Now, when at 4:00 yesterday, I posted that from my Droid, I thought that Mr. Herman was going to get mega bucks from LSU. May STILL do so. He DOES have a 7 figure raise on the table (prior to the loss) to entice him to stay at Houston.

        My point….if Jimmy Sexton and Trace Armstrong would form their OWN agencies (probably not a penthouse big enough for their heads and egos), then I WOULD want in on the IPO as the Trump euphoria seems to be inflating the contract amounts of the coaches. Time will tell if their NFL clients will also see such … but you never can tell.

        These boys are the recipients of a slice of the booty….and like most females….the booty is getting bigger day by day….despite the “Kneeing” exercises…..

        The Fiasco in the Pines…..The IC BM’s were calling for a firing of the hat. They were quoting fake texts from Mike the Longhorns AD saying….”Hat, no thanks….please delete me from your contacts….Love, Mike “Hookem Horns” AD”. We woofies were jubilant right up to the Pittsburgh Comeback that UNC made. I guess that all the Light Blue Magic was used up earlier in the season.

        I also think that IF the HAT leaves, that Blue Smurfette Folt, in the grandest of ALL HB2 Protests….insists that Bubba only interview Openly Gay FB Coaches. THAT would show TRUE dedication to the cause. Even Jill Stein would be proud of her….

        • BobLee Reply
          6 months ago

          If Chanc Chihuahua gets any say so about ANY coach at ANY time UNC Athletics IS DOOMED.

  • Doug Reply
    6 months ago

    Nice analysis. In some degree it must be a lot easier for a coach at an Oregon or Oklahoma State. Grovel to the Phil Knight or T. Boone Pickens committees of ONE, stay in their good graces, don’t fiddle around with their trophy wives or daughters and the coach can pretty much by-pass the MFC by committee found at most schools including NCSU and UNC. By comparison, Wendell Murphy, NCSU and Walter Williams , ECU mere millions are petty cash accounts to the likes of Phil and Boone. Both would likely consider themselves broke with Wendell’s or Walter’s $$. I have no idea who the $$ guys are in Chapel Hill. Needless to say I’m not on any of these guys Christmas card list.

    I wonder if I need a new iPhone too. For some reason I can not comment on mine. Something in my settings maybe? I can comment and respond to comments on my iPad of Mac Book but not the phone. If any tech savvy types reading this know what the issue is or suggest a fix please let me know. I enjoy BLS but somehow can’t justify $900 just to be able to add my incredible insights to your audience. 🤑

    • BobLee Reply
      6 months ago

      Schmoozing your fat cats is always important at a “juggernaut school”. Even Nick has to do it. If Nick ever loses two in regular season, he will feel the heat.

  • Bob Kennel Reply
    6 months ago

    BL, interesting blog that rings generally true about the big business aspects of today’s collegiate “revenue-producing” sports. It is regrettable but true. I go back to a time that an Earle Edwards is who we should all want as a coach. Furthermore I view Dave Doeren as an Edwards’ type of person with knowledge, skills, and integrity. Already made my thoughts known to some friends who are “Fat Cats” by your definition although more reasonable people than Texas or some Rams Club “Fat Cats”. As well as our “Powers That Be”. Just hoping we don’t act like other schools that have lead some ACC schools to “Unpleasantness”.
    NC State 68 had done his homework.
    However, I just don’t think Doeren should be relieved at this time independent of Friday’s game or buyout costs. Doeren has not lost his team, and he’s at lot closer to a 10-1 record than a 3-7 record.
    Will be there Saturday with bells on.
    Go Pack!

    • BobLee Reply
      6 months ago

      I have stated each time I’ve written on this brouhaha that Bambard makes the chip shot FG and none of this is happening even with BC and Miami or what happens Friday. That said “common sense” rarely rules in this sort of mob rule. I suppose it will play out behind closed doors with whichever MFCs are pushing a change. Since you state that NCSU has a different breed o’ cat than other Power 5 schools it may have a more reasoned outcome. … a W in Kenan greatly shifts the odds I assume.

  • NCSU68Grad Reply
    6 months ago

    BL,
    Good column. Nice humor and analysis. Try to be concise (wink).
    Do not know any MFC or FC’s by name, but can recognize their faces. Do not have your new iPhone Contact list nor on anyone’s speed dial. However, when I was invited to graze at a few TG’s in CF within the past month or so…from some folks that devote way more time than re$ources to the “Cause”, I met folks that you would recognize from some photos hanging in CF and Reynolds. The “boosters” that hosted the TG’s were open in their small talk and opinions.
    Factoid, not to take away from your scenario. The WPC has a Limited Scope or Charter. That was set by the NCGA and the UNC BOG circa 1990 as part of the University’s Penance for winning a National Championship and having Jimmy V. hawk 280Z’s and drive a RED ONE.
    ALL donations to the WPC are for Student Athlete Scholarships. There are also Capital Campaign’s run by our version of Mark Thomas, Mr. Bobby Purcell. He is the ULTIMATE dealmaker. The Coach’s Salary or perks do NOT come from the WPC. AD Yow’s AD Budget is based on Ticket revenue, TV rights, Clothing endorsements AND the WPC’s Scholly Donations. Last year the WPC gave around $10 Million to the AD Budget for Schollys. They also spent $20 Million on “Capital Facilities” and a mere $200K for a Special University Requested item.
    The Rams Club has about 1.75X MORE income that does the WPC. They provided $15 Million in Schollys and $2.6 Million for Facilities. In addition, $4.75 Million went for Coaches Supplements as the Rams Club supplements several coaches’ pay stub…..and the UNC Coaches also negotiate their own TV/Radio gigs and their Clothing Gigs. AD Yow consolidated all that for leverage and the Coaches are NOT allowed to negotiate separate contracts. They can do TV spots and run camps, subject to AD Yow’s blessing….but that is the extent of the their supplemental income. EYES ARE GLAZING
    My point….the WPN has NO way to fund buyouts and such. An interesting point….the WPC’s Net Assets are $84 Million and The Rams Club is $23 Million. Both are highly ranked by Charity Navigator and their Admin expense (%) are about the same. The AD and Booster CEO’s Combined Salaries is within a percent or so….Bubba makes more and we pay Bobby a bit more. THEREIN LIES THE PROBLEM….The WP MFC’s hands are a little more “Tied” by the Gestapo rules laid out in 1990 by the aforementioned UNC Dominated Rules Writers and Regulators. Think Obama’s Phone and Pen methods.
    NOW, there is, supposedly (verified by other sources) a move afoot to establish a “Burner” Entity. Said organization, whose membership would be by INVITATION ONLY (as in a Clinton Fund Raiser), COULD have a stated goal and purpose….Helping AD Yow remove the Chestnuts without the need for future medical attention. THEN, like the intro to Mission Impossible, there would be NO record of the assignment to Ethan Hunt. We MIGHT not even KNOW WHOM the Benefactor(s) were….it would just HAPPEN. The NCSU AD Budget is pretty solid, but there are NO reserves (to the best of my asking and also reviewing the 50 page IRS/NCAA reports) that could be tapped for DD’s $2.5 Million Send Off.
    This info is a compilation of discussions (sober and otherwise) and digging into records and also doing my own little “spread sheet business model”. IF AD Yow’s budget had to fund DD’s departure, then there would be a $4 or so surcharge for each FB ticket for the next 3 years.
    In addition, to be competitive with the total package that The Hat has, we would need to kick up the Ticket Price by an additional $3 for a 50% INCREASE in the NEW Coach’s total draw. Add in a 15% increase in concessions so that we can afford those expensive “assistants” (like GC) and THEN we, the West Raleigh Woofies, would be COMPETITIVE with what the FB “expenses” are in the Lofty (but thinning) Pines.
    In conclusion (YEA!), if the Hat gets a W in about 48 hours, then the HAT’s resume is ENHANCED. Coach Doeren’s fate is sealed and there will be no donuts with the Sunday Morning coffee that he is invited to.
    It was interesting that you brought in Dr. Woodson as a person that was involved the the MDP (Management Development Plan….our what I used to have to write for my boss and also reviewed the 25 or so of my direct reports). IF he has set forth the Minimum and it ain’t (even with ONE more W) gonna be met…then I guess your previous column about said Rubicon crossing would be applicable.
    alea iacta est. The literal translation is that Mid West Dave will have an opportunity to ply his trade in a new locale…The Woodson Factor was NOT mentioned in the aforementioned TG Grazing safaries. In fact, the Nuclear Option (Buyout of AD Yow) was the ONLY pathway, according to some who I believe are in the know (they have RW and DY and BP and DD and MC and EA’s cell numbers and are frequently seen hobnobing in private social settings).
    Thanks for the great and insightful overview and the additional info. I DID do a small survey and even though a W for the UNC would solve TWO problems….there are NO WP Fans that are going to pull for UNC. As a matter of fact, there are loyalty pledges circulating as I type. BUT, many of them certainly understand that “Losing the Battle would WIN the war” (NCSU Loss) and would be a Win-Win for the Pack. The icing on the cake is that the HAT will be gone and UNC’s program will have to regroup. Many are betting that the Blue Smurfette will INSIST on a PC coach from the Ivy League. Tony Reno will make a WONDERFUL new UNC HC….
    Happy T day to you and family and readers…..let the games be played….

    • BobLee Reply
      6 months ago

      I don’t pretend to know the set-up of the WPC. I’m simply going by several adult WPC members. If both institutions make changes in HFBC that would be an Amato / Bunting situation. If UNC went with Guru Gene that changes that dynamic. We shall see.

  • JDanWuff Reply
    6 months ago

    I’m not sure DD will get dumped this year, but if he does so be it. I don’t know who would want to take a job with a fan base and administrators that change coaches every four or five years. Doeren is the eighth coach at State since Holtz left in 1976. No continuity there.
    Beamer and Bowden must have just scratched their heads.
    None of my bucks go to athletics anymore. I give to the Alumni Association and the School of Engineering..
    I wish them well amid the Lofty Pines. I’ll be playing with the grandkids.

    • BobLee Reply
      6 months ago

      In defense of your bunch of goofy squirrels… EVERY “sleeping giant” has the same species of goofy squirrels. 🙂 … which is why I never run out of column fodder.

  • Ed.N.Gsbo Reply
    6 months ago

    “Dave told Mrs Doeren after that BC loss “lets put a hold on putting in that pool”. …. vintage BobLee. 🙂 … DD probably said that on the way home from Greenville back in September.
    .
    DD does seem like a “nice guy” but not an especially “likable guy” in his public persona. A bit of a “dry ball”. That has to work against him in times like this. Of course TO’B was not exactly Mr Personality either.
    .
    IMO if he flops on Black Friday, he is toast. A W “amid the pines” could save him. Fans will remember beating UNC more than losing to BC.

    • BobLee Reply
      6 months ago

      Yes, I agree that a W amid the pines COUNTS A LOT. It would – imo – “save him”. It is not that difficult to see happening. I’ll be watching for sure.

  • Terry.F Reply
    6 months ago

    So is giving Big Bucks to WPC or Rams Club or whatever… the same as giving Big Bucks to The Clinton Foundation as far as Quid Pro Quo? “I’m giving you this but I expect ______ in return. Capice?”

    • BobLee Reply
      6 months ago

      An intriguing comparison… BK, of course, has no idea what you’re talking about re: “The Clinton Foundation” but he can Google it. Yes… that comparison IS valid. Instead of defense contracts, oil leases, and assorted “insider info” Big Donors to WPC / Rams / etc. should expect “appreciation” for their generous “donations”. And they do. Whether that extends to “BECAUSE I’M TELLING YOU TO” orders is the question. Unlike the here today / gone tomorrow nature of political cronyism, sports booster clubs do have more permanence. Even if Bobby Purcell or John Montgomery leave, the donor ledgers remain for their successors to memorize.

  • altwolf Reply
    6 months ago

    How sad….the Earl Edwards type in this day and time would not Stand a chance!Just being a fine man and good leader is not good enough in the world we live in today.I for one would not like to be a player in today’s environment.

    • BobLee Reply
      6 months ago

      But Earl played in quaint Riddick Stadium with ‘nary a suite or a Jumbotron. And Earl didn’t get paid MILLIONS. I expect Coach Edwards never made more than $30,000/yr.

      • DrVinnyboombatz Reply
        6 months ago

        I think Doren returns!

        • BobLee Reply
          6 months ago

          I think “Short List” Larry returns too.
          .
          CHAOS reigns at LSU and Texas as Tom Hermans loses (again) …. Fat Cats in PANIC MODE across Juggernaut Land.

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