Grandstands at Wrigley Field are ….

October24/ 2016

America’s sports media is as creative and innovative as it’s news media…. i.e. “not very much at all”.   This week will be non-stop CUBS, CUBS, CUBS and more CUBS. If that bothers you go crawl in a hole for the next ten days.

Count the number of references to curses…. billy goats …. and Steve Bartman. Constrast those bazillion references to the words “Cleveland Indians” who THE CUBS are playing in The Fall Classic. As if anyone more than 25 miles of Cleveland really cares.

I am on-record admitting, several weeks ago I could not name “an Indian” unless we get into Geronimo, Sitting Bull, Crazy Horse and Noc-A-Homa. I recalled a few “old Indians” such as Iron Eyes Cody, Rocky Colavito, and Herb Score. I now know former UNCAndrewMillerCH ace Andrew Miller who A-Rod says may be THE Best Reliever in Baseball History…. YIKES! They have a fine shortstop in Francisco Lindor who smiles all the time…. And Mike Napoli who plays in every World Series but never for the same team twice. They have some guy with a bloody finger and Tito Francona’s son Terry is their manager. I’ve always liked Terry Francona…. Seems like a good guy.

The fact that The Indians ARE “The Indians” and have a goofy “Chief Wahoo” as their logo is sure to be a story line somewhere. Charlie Sheen wanted to bring back his “Wild Thing” character from Major League but MLB kiboshed that idea.

If there are at least two Indian nickname protestors at any WS game expect them to both get MAX on-camera time. Because…. Well, you know why.

Because “my Cardinals” played the CUBS 19 times this past season I am very familiar with their roster. Seems like a good group of guys who really love playing Baseball”. FWIW… the Cards’ beat the CUBS 9 times which is more Ws than any other team managed to do. Gotta like Joe Maddon too.

One storyline you likely will NOT see anywhere but right here is:

The Grandstands at Wrigley Field are:
whiter than…. a member-guest at Augusta.
whiter than…. the backstretch at Talladega.
whiter than…. a Taylor Swift fan club convention.
whiter than…. (you try a few…. whiter than ______)

Baseball fandom in general is significantly “eeeevil privileged” old white folks.  MLB rosters ARE diverse but that diversity is “brown & yellow” with Latin Americans and Asian / Oriental / Pacific Rim. I can never remember which is the preferred PC-nomenclature for Japanese and Koreans. A team / league only earns “Diversity points” for pure-bred Afro-Ams who speak English and can (1) claim a great great grandparent was “a slave” or (2) “watched Roots” back in the early 70s.  Having a clue who Jackie Robinson was helps too.

Aroldis Chapman – from Cuba – the fire-balling closer for the CUBS might “look black” but cannot speak a word of English despite six years in MLB so Aroldis doesn’t count.

Speaking of Aroldis Chapman…. When the CUBS traded for him at mid-season they traded another UNCCH pitcher – Adam Warren – to The Yankees. Otherwise BOTH WS teams would have Mike Fox’s boys on their roster. Adam Warren is from New Bern which also is the hometown of a certain NC State Baseball Legend….Jemele Hill

Will ESPN CEO John Skipper (UNC’75) a/k/a The Most PC-obsessed executive in American Media be compelled to stage yet another of his whizbang “Town Halls with resident racial she-activist Jemele Hill” to decry the overt whiteness of Baseball. Lets hope not but don’t be surprised if he does so.  Particularly now that I’ve mentioned it.

Will Bozo Joe Biden’s boss be compelled to visit Wrigley for the WS despite being a life-long “South Sider”? If so, the diversity #s will ratchet up to “1”. “2” if “WideBottom” comes with him.

NOTE: I’d REALLY like to do a few paragraphs on “Bozo Joe” Biden but AgentPierce insists “Bozo Joe” belongs to him. So I will defer.

I have no “favorite team” in the WS. I will just hope for “good games” and “no one gets hurt”.


… I saw the latest Jack Reacher movie with Tom Cruise yesterday. Tom Cruise is NOT my (or your) choice as “Reacher” but he is Jack Reacherauthor Lee Childs’ choice. My choice was Jim Caviezel – Person of Interest, but no one asked me.

“The critics” are panning the movie, but “the critics” pan most movies. I LIKED IT. It has everything you expect in such a movie ….. lots of badass butt-kicking …. A REALLY sadistic bad guy that you KNOW Reacher will kill in a big finale fight scene … and he does. No Sex…. Not a bit. Reacher / Cruise utters some terse mono-syllables and in the end “Reacher” is hitchiking to his next movie….


Big Time College Football’s WEEK 6 or 7 or whichever it is….

Weeelll…. Urban Meyer ain’t as popular around Columbus OH today as he was on Friday. Urban’s Buckeyes got upended in Happy Valley. tOSU still has a chance at a Final Four but they are standing on a banana peel. As with all Juggernauts…. ONE L and their “seat” gets warm. TWO L’s and the Twitter threats begin…. THREE L’s and its “hire armed bodyguards” time. Tough Bizness.

Texas Longhorns under Charlie Strong lost their umpteenth game. An ESPNer Adnan Whozit reported that “the noose is tightening around Charlie Strong neck….” and KABOOM…. Before you could say “NEVER say noose about a black guy” ESPN CEO John Skipper (UNC75) (1) fell out of his chair…. (2) Burst three bloodvessels in his neck…. and (3) was about to fire Adnan Whozit before ESPN’s HR stooge reminded Skipper than Adnan is some sort of Middle Eastern-guy and therefore can’t be fired.

Skipper considered simply blaming it on Mike Greenberg.  Greeny is Jewish and Jewish is NOT a privileged minority at ESPN.  ESPN’s legal dept recommended against doing that.Jemele Hill

Adnan quickly apologized to Charlie Strong and to the descendants of any black person who (1) might have ever been lynched or (2) who saw Roots back in the early 70s. Adnan agreed to six months of intense sensitivity indoctrination from Jemele Hill.  (insert same pic of Jemele Hill from above to see if anyone notices)

Not a good Saturday in L-ville for The Men of Doeren. Playing two Top Five Juggernauts on-the-road back-back is not the best way to spend one’s mid-October. DAMN you Johnny Swofford.

Speaking of L-ville, you all saw that Tricky Ricky Beat The Rap w/ the Ho’s as we all knew he would. He might get “a Boeheim” wrist slap and have to sit out a few games against whozits but that’s it.

The Fedorians beat a Virginia team they were suppose to beat in a place they used to always lose at…. but don’t any more. The Fedorians are down to 3rd string OL walk-ons so the rest of this season COULD get dicey. Just don’t lose to “a hated rival” and what counts as “loyal fans” will be as happy as UNC FB fans can be which is “not very”.

Of the 5-6 unbeatens across the Fruited Plain…. 4-5 of’em have to play one another over the next few weeks. COULD BE some major discombobulation coming down. You know how much I do love discombobulation.


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