UNC Announces: “We Gonna Have One (IPF) Too”

UNC IPF
BobLee
February03/ 2016

 

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This Week… Someone could come up with cures for both Cancer and Male Pattern Baldness and neither discovery would be able to squeeze onto the Global Front Page.  But maybe we have SOME AWESOME NEWS you haven’t heard about …..

Awesome News

Sure… there was some sort of political fandango in some fly-over place called Iowa on Monday.  I suppose that was important to whoever still follows political fandangos.  The Future and Fate of America is so “last century”.  I mean REALLY.   Booooring.

If those political people wanted to be relevant they would nominate CAM.   I bet if Donald Trump had “dabbed” like CAM he woulda won.   And, I know if Hillary had worn zebra-stripped yoga pants like CAM she woulda trounced that Bernie Whozit.

Today is National Semi-Literate Signing Day.  Kids who can’t spell CAM if you spot them the “a” and the “m” will have board monkeys all across the fruited plain holding their breath as they announce where they will matriculate. Do you think even one of those semi-literate 18 y/os has a clue or gives a damn what “matriculate” means?  How many of’em do ya think will “dab” as they announce their decision?

What are the odds that EVERY Power Five Football Coach will sign “Everyone We Really Wanted” today. On National Signing Day those odds are 100%.

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Forget about Iowa… Forget about CAM… Forget National Semi-Literate Signing Day.

THE BIGGEST NEWS this week is from “amid Kenan’s Lofty Pines”.

Yes, Indeedy.  The University of North Carolina @ Chapel Hill formally unveiled its long-awaited and much ballyhooed:

We’re Gonna Have One Too… So There – Snazzy IPF Website

If anything can muscle its way onto a crowded Global Front Page it’s gotta be THIS.  Surely THIS will awaken that Ol’ Sleeping Giant by golly!

NOTE:  For those of you keeping count, this will be the third such totally unnecessary facility in The Triangle joining Duke’s and NC State’s.   Leaving only NCCU, Shaw, St Augustine’s and Cardinal Gibbons without one.  Yet.

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FYI:  These “types of silly things” are usually paid for, regardless of the school, by a handful of Mega Fat Cats for whom high six figures donations are no-biggie.  These are not “grassroots” campaigns.  Yes, their largess could go for much more worthwhile purposes, but it’s their $$$ to do with as they please.

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Specifically timed to bedazzle those aforementioned Semi-Literate “world-class student-athletes”…. this $20,000,000+ hunk of Totally Superfluous Recruiting Bling will immediately join the UNC Black Cultural Center as in-yo-face examples of What Is Really Important at A World-Class “Punchline” of a once respected institution.

Plans for a 40-story obelisk in the Franklin / Columbia Street intersection honoring LGBTQs are “on the drawing board”…. a giddy Chancellor “Chihuahua” Folt squeaked.

When asked how this latest absurdity will be paid for, Chancellor Chihuahua giggledCarol Folt

“Oh mercy me, I don’t know nuthin’ about such things.  I think they expect some people called “braggin’ rights-obsessed Fat Cats” to come up with the money…. but who knows.  I’m just in charge of diversity stuff.   Would you like a lapel ribbon?

The snazzy new IPF website does not mention how many (1) Smoothie Machines, (2) charging stations or (3) giant holograms of Beyonce that UNC’s new We Gonna Have One Too… So There will have; but we can only assume oodles and oodles of all three.

When shown the snazzy website…. Clemson’s Dabo Swinney noted

“I guess they can’t afford mini-golf, huh?”

A rumor that this Shining Example of Totally Misplaced Priorities will be named for Margaret Spellings  was immediately debunked by a visibly outraged university official… mortified by the mere thought of such sacrilege.  “Yuck, ptui… we’ve been ordered to hate that Bush woman.”

With “Hindenburg Hangar” already claimed by NC State; subject to approval of UNC’s Board of Trustees, UNC-CH’s will be called:

The House That Marvin Built

Say Good Night Choo Choo …..
#

 

UNC Announces It’s Latest Ridiculous Monument To Misplaced Priorities….

 

http://ramsclub.com/ViewArticle.dbml?ATCLID=210680191&SITE=RC

 

UNCIPF2

UNC IPF

UNC IPF

How to Contribute

Online – Follow this link to make a pledge online. Current Rams Club members will sign-in with their existing account information. New contributors will need to create a new account and follow the steps to make a pledge.

or

Pledge form – Download and complete this form to make a pledge. Completed forms can be mailed to The Rams Club at PO Box 2446, Chapel Hill, NC 27515 or emailed to [email protected]

Questions regarding pledges to this campaign should be directed to Grant Leiendecker at 919.962.6226 or [email protected]

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Doug
Guest
Doug

Wake Forest opened their IPF up in January. Dave Clawson said, “We finally have something here, other than our stadium, to show recruits that we’re committed to play a high level of football.” And this. “That building has been an absolute difference-maker for us” among other things cited as a great recruiting class. I’m sure he actually believes it too. WF’s all time 432–633–33 (.408%) won-loss record has me thinking that having an IPF was needed, oh say, about 100 years ago but Jim Grobe didn’t need one in 2006.

Chip
Guest
Chip

What about the “tin can” where they have the indoor track? That doesn’t count?

RD
Guest
RD

Hey BL, where’s Kennel? Haven’t heard from him in several weeks.

TheCowdog
Guest
TheCowdog

Happy Appy had the hanger first, by God… Multiple sport usage, too.
I don’t know if Hamlet has ever been rehearsed there, but the rest of UNC systems were far behind. Geez.
The projected one at CH is all part of surviving the nuclear winters. Gotta think ahead.

Disillusioned-TarHeel
Guest
Disillusioned-TarHeel

BL, will “they” claim this will be a multi-purpose facility like they said about The Dean Dome?

Chip
Guest
Chip

Hillary in yoga pants ?! Good God I just threw up in my mouth.

Doug
Guest
Doug

Is it true that the only way this got off the ground in the first place was a promise that the IPF would also be available for basic training for those delicate little snowflakes of the perpetually offended, AKA UNControllables? Wouldn’t want them to be harmed by those harsh UV rays would we? Or would we? ?

I’ve already been informed that this IPF won’t be nearly as cool as the one planted smack dab in the middle of a parking lot near the State Fair.

OldAlphaWolf
Guest

Hey, I’m all for it….:-) Good for the economy..

RC
Guest
RC

You might have used it before and I missed it (and it isn’t completely fair) but I LOVE “National Semi-Literate Signing Day!” A keeper!

MB-from-Balmer
Guest
MB-from-Balmer

So BL, it looks like they would reorient the turf field where field hockey plays with stands to run parallel to the street? Then drop this between them and Fetzer?

fayettewuf
Guest
fayettewuf

You should at least credit Hollywood Henderson re: Terry Bradshaw. That quote came to mind when I was listening to Cam speak the other day.

Elrod
Guest
Elrod

Just think, BL. If the “leadership” had just been adults after Marvin hit ‘send’, their new IPF would already be paid for and Chancellor Chihuahua could buy a whole bunch of lapel ribbons.

SWVAUNCer
Guest
SWVAUNCer

“Kids who can’t spell CAM if you spot them the “a” and the “m”…”

Now I’ve joined the club of getting coffee on my keyboard while reading Bob Lee. That is funny!

BTW, the NYT had a good article on Cam (did I spell that right?) and his days at Blinn either this morning or yesterday. I didn’t see until this morning when someone put it on FB.

Porcophile
Guest
Porcophile

They’re going to need more than that to attract “world class student athletes” if the NCAA hits them with a ban on post-season play.