I Can’t Count To 10 !

February21/ 2011

I can’t count to 10.  No, I’m not a Rival’s Top 100 football recruit.  I can not count Ten current ACC basketball players !  Of the ones I can name, 20% are Plumlees.  Without Larry Drew I’m down to nine.   I’m as clueless with current ACC Head Coaches.   I can name six of the 12 and “Williams” are 30% of those. 

My disinterest is not going to send ESPN into Chapter 11 or cause Little Johnny Swofford to order the names on the jerseys be upped a few type sizes.   My apathy is not a “one down year” thing.

I cannot name ANYONE who ever played basketball for Boston College or VaTech.  Rick Barry is my only U of Miami BB player.  Has Clemson had a player worth remembering since the Mahaffey brothers?

Re: NHL …  Chuck Kaiton can rattle off more NHL player’s names in seven seconds than I can come up with given a week and allowed to use Howe and Hull.  Chuck Kaiton is a wonderful human being but hockey on the radio is like listening to someone speed read a Ukrainian phone book. ….. The WNBA?  I can’t even name a team. There is probably a player named Chartreuse or Tullulah.

Prince Albert emailed me a week ago all aflutter over how poorly Royz Boyz played at Clemson.  I didn’t even know they had played.  I recommended Albert listen to a David Jeremiah tape.

How/why has this come about?  I don’t have a “why”.  It’s not a harumph on my part over the raging hypocrisy of the whole mess.  Basketball’s Fall sibling – College Football – still has my viewing interest.  Both are dirtier than Madonna’s dairy, but I at least will watch CFb.

I channel surf thru the umpteen ESPNs to get to Diners, Drive-Ins & Dives or a History Channel piece on The Punic Wars.

Week to week I don’t care any more unless there is some goofy scandal or Ol’ Roy gets froggy.  Last year I did not fill out “a bracket” in March.  I won’t fill one out this year either.

I WILL follow Madame Yow’s Wild Ride otherwise known as an NC State coaching search.  That’s a sport all by itself – Water Balloons, Silly String & Nerf Bats On The Brickyard.

A relatively well-known UNCer asked me recently if I was “going to the game” that night.  No.  I now politely turndown comp lower-level PLUS a parking pass unless one of a handful of friends will go with me.

I was discussing this topic with a dear friend who has been REALLY REALLY close to the ACC sports scene for 60 years ….. REALLY close.  He thought for a minute and admitted he could not name 10 current ACC players or more than 6 coaches either.  So I may not be the only one.  Neither of us felt the least bit disloyal or ashamed admitting our apathy.  It doesn’t have anything to do with “the recent unpleasantness” but that certainly hasn’t helped any.

Is my condition akin to not eating barbecue or not watching Andy Griffith reruns?   I can still name all three Pep Boys and everyone who has played James Bond including David Niven and George Lazenby.  It’s not a leaky memory issue.  It’s apathy.   Why bother?  They’ll all quit, transfer or go pro within a year any way.


Daytona 500 Winner – Trevor Bayne – sounds like / looks like Justin Beiber’s lab partner.   Apparently Trevor is an unbelievably Wonderful Guy.  First driver to win Daytona with a learner’s permit.

Carl Edwards’ post-race interview was THE most entertaining and fun interview I ever heard from a professional sports celebrity.


A CNN NBA analyst (David Aldridge) described NBA AllStar Weekend as “Black Thanksgiving”.  What more can you say?  Aldridge is black.


Do not dismiss the Toomer’s Corner Terrorist as

these deranged “fan vigilantes”….

no big deal.  Imagine if a deranged Wuff Loonie blew up The Old Well with an RPG.   No big deal?  I’ve warned about such a mutant strain of board monkeys for several years.  Watch these “fan vigilantes” pop up like dandelions across BCS-Land.

You say “Auburn deserved it ‘cause they’re all a bunch of crooks.”  A lot of NCStaters are saying that about UNC in the aftermath of Butch’s Sgt Schultz act.


UNC Football Alum (’64) – Chris Hanburger – is an NFL Hall of Fame inductee.  Yes, I have a personal Hanburger anecdote.  The punch line, however, involves a gynecological euphemism that I simply won’t use here and the story doesn’t work without it.  Sorry.

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