How Does BobLee Know?

December15/ 2009

.. Over the past six months your humble Internet Legend has “gone yard” on “I told you so’s” at a pace that even Josh Hamilton would envy.  Do I have more Deep Throats among my contacts than Tiger does in his speed dial?  Do I use a magic eight ball?  How do I do it?  And a bunch more stuff ….. AND a God-lovin’ Baby Jesus Birthday reminder of the season.

After a decade as your cyber bard of choice, few things surprise me.  Other than that some nitwit board monkey cuzzin of Ted Kuzinski hasn’t firebombed my World HQ yet.   But lately I’ve received an increasing number of “Doggone it BobLee, you were right again.” ….. and “How do you know all that stuff you know, BobLee?”

I’m hearing it regularly from poobahs and pedestrians.  From movers  & shakers to rank & filers.   The hoity toity as well as the hoi polloi can’t figure out how I figure it out an incredibly high % of the time.   Sure, there is a “blind hog” factor in the “I told you so” bizness.   Hellfire, I predict enuff stuff that indeed “a blind hog” could find a truth truffle now and then.

FIRST …. “Details” are, and always will be, RELEVANT here.  I care not what course others may take, but straight-shootin’ even when it hurts is how BobLee respects his readers.

I also employ a mirror image flip to all “spinmeisters” trying to confuse us.  When UNC’s “Spinnin’ Steve” Kirschner (a quite decent fellow by the way) issued his recent “Brian Kelly The Mad Presbyterian was probably knee-walking drunk and probably downloading kiddie porn and probably jaywalking and probably listening to talk radio ….” cover-up of Roy’s screw-up; well, right off you knew Brian was a tea-totaling Eagle Scout who delivers Meals On Wheels when not volunteering down to the soup kitchen. Stevie spun that one big time!

Also NEVER believe Phil “He Just Didn’t Do It” Knight about anything.  When Phil issues his standard “vote of confidence” for one of his serial spokes-felons, you can go ahead and fit’em for an orange jumpsuit.  If Hitler was shilling for Nike “jackboots” Phil Knight would be a Holocaust Denier.  It’s quite likely Phil knows the birthstone of each of Tiger’s bimbos and has known it a loooong time..   The PGA’s Tim Finchem knew it too,

 We interrupt this self-serving diatribe to tell you ….. the best bet to be the 12th school in the Big Ten is Missouri.  Dominos will then start falling up/down the Eastern Seaboard.  When the dust settles Little Johnny Swofford’s whizbang plan to snare “the Boston TV market” for the ACC will be declared officially failed.

The Sports and political spinners of the world are in the bizness of giving you the bizness.  To paraphrase Bill Shakespeare; “The evil that men do must be covered up so any good they might do can be exaggerated ad infinitum ….”

I attribute my incredible successful guess % to my breadth of experiences across the fruited plain dealing with a wide spectrum of the human species.  After a while everybody reminds you of somebody especially among society’s dirty birds and rascals.   The “holiers than thous” rarely are ….. and the “sorry no-accounts” usually have an iota of gumption in there somewhere (although not always!).

There’s only so many formulas for snake-oil and most of them what sells it learn their sales pitch from the same P.T, Barnum flim flammers’ manuals.  I’ve read the Cliff Notes of those manuals.


Yes, Roy DID indeed “apologize” for his latest “Noooo Roy No ….” and yes his apology came 36 hours after my advicing “Hey Roy you silly goof; you need to man-up and apologize for this one!”  Did I persuade him?  I told him he oughta ….. and he did.  You do the math.

Roy’s tall skinny boyz got thumped convincingly by Rick Barnes’ big strong men despite hard-core Heels saying how much they still really hate Rick because he once dared to chest up to Dean.  That career milestone has not prevented Rick from recruiting a bunch of very big, strong, fast rebounders.  The average Texas front court guy outweighed John Henson by over 85 pounds.   (The average Texas cheerleader outweighes John Henson by only 20 pounds).  How come Roy doesn’t recruit big strong guys (except for Tyler)?   I’m not complaining.  I trust Roy2Rings.  I was just wondering. ……

Doesn’t (the late) Jeff Crompton still have a semester of eligibility left? Somewhere on Earth someone sees Neil Fingleton and says “I bet he played basketball.”  Someone somewhere says that about Neil Fingleton EVERY DAY.  Does Kris Lang still jump like a frog?

“We” will get better and better thru Jan & Feb but I don’t see us dancing very long in March.  That’s why God invented “next years”.

UNC AthDept guys are concerned about empty seats in Dean’s Dome this season.  A bevy of likely contributing reasons headed by (1) HDTV and (2) it’s a real pain in the butt to go.  And (3) with Tyler gone there’s no guarantee that Tami will be there.  BUT – the dance team has been upgraded !!!

Kentucky beat us this year AND reached 2,000 before we did.  Saying “who cares” only works if you would have said that if UNC had reached 2,000 first.  We are waaaay ahead of Kentucky in Women’s Soccer, Field Hockey and pretty darn close in Men’s Basketball.  Plus there’s that Charles Kuralt and Thomas Wolfe stuff.  Now, feel better?


Over in Kenan. The Pale Rider has fulfilled the #1 NCAA Bowl Rule.  EVERY team going to a bowl MUST suspend a minimum of one player for “unspecified violation of team rules” by December 10.  The average number of suspensions is three.  (I don’t know why) That year Florida State suspended 20+ set the modern day record that few expect to see surpassed.  30+ bowl games = 60+ teams = 120+ sacrificial suspensions.  Maybe they only have so many cheap watches to pass out ??

Butch suspended a “3rd string special teams kid” for “something that happened” immediately after Butch’s most recent “I thought Duke was our rival” oops against TO’B.  The specific “something” is ALWAYS unclear.  WuffLoons and TO’B himself, say the “3rd string special teams kid” was a Taliban operative and had something to do with Pat Tillman’s tragic death.  Butch OTOH says the poor kid just neglected to say “may I?” when crossing Carter-Finley to teach a group of deaf orphans how to juggle.  The elusive “truth”, as ALWAYS, lies twixt the two accounts.  The N&O headline O’Brien Peeved At Butch was pretty funny.

“3rd string special team kids” constitute 96% of suspensions during bowl-preparation month.  Who recalls Carl Torbush and his Romp’em Stomp’em Heels prior to Carl’s Gator Bowl vs VaTech?  Check the record.  A “3rd string special teams kid” was sent up the river for that one.  ……. Mammas don’t let your boys grow up to be 3rd string special teams kids.

You DO know that Pitt’s Offensive Coordinator is Frank “I’m a guru” Cignetti.  You may recall Frank as the final nail in John Bunting’s coffin.  John had some special talents.  Staff hiring was NOT one of them.

   At each Bowl, the team that suspends the highest number of inconsequential 3rd stringers gets first dibs on the tacky watches and cheap electronic crap. ….. I bet you didn’t know that.  Yet another “how did you know, BobLee” moment.


Getting serious now …….. how many times over the past decade have you read about a Nativity Scene or some other Christian celebration of Christ’s Birth being outlawed in some Happy Days community in our country?  It happened a number of times this year too.   Every time we shake our head, curse the ACLU or whatever God-hating self-loathing batch of nitwits …..  and we go on about your business.

We never hear about a Nativity Scene or Christian symbol being ADDED anywhere.  Do the math.   One day there won’t be any more.  There is no longer any doubt where America is headed.  The only question is how large a handbasket will be needed to get us there and when.

I don’t intend to hide my Christian faith under any bushel.   The determination of those determined to force America out from “under God” is the best indicator of how much they fear Him (and us!).   I don’t fear Him.  I love Him because He first loved me.  He died for me (and you too).  Happy Birthday Jesus and ……

a Very Merry Christmas to You All.

(This is the one in our foyer)


**********Yes …… I got my truck painted.  It is sooooo cool!

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