Save The Cheerleader, Save The _____.

BobLee
December28/ 2007

If you immediately understand today’s title you know BobLee’s most recent all compelling addiction ….. That and other holiday happenings bring us to year-end …. BL & The Mizzus will sing Auld Lang Syne on toney Bald Head Island w/ former CIA Director George Tenet and assorted Oklahoma oil moguls. …. and a Navy pilot.. …. Look out 2008 …. HERE WE COME!

Our 20th Christmas as a family trio is now boxed up and restored under beds, in closets and, when absolutely necessary …. in the attic.  Among the assorted core beliefs that Mizzus and I have carved in our familial bedrock is that the most prized legacy that we can leave Kid is AN EMPTY ATTIC.

You understand that if you have ever had to resolve an estate upon the passing of a senior parent.  All those tender memories of yesteryears past take on a decidedly different aroma when you are faced with piles of moldy memories tucked in head bumping crawlspaces in dark attic nooks.  An old Parcheesi board and Tonto’s plastic horse but a long gone plastic Tonto beg the question “do we really want to burden Kid with this just because my Mom chose to burden me with it”?  The automatic rejoiner is “it might be worth something to someone someday” is why you’re faced with the dilemma.  God invented Hefty trash bags for a reason.  Your progeny will never appreciate the hassle you spare them by trashing the trash but DO IT.

A characteristic commiserate with the onset of “well into middle age” is reflection.  With Kid now halfway thru college we can proudly say that we have never had a Christmas meltdown.  Our Christmas traditions have stayed pretty much the same modified only by Kid’s steady advancement from toddler to child to pre-teen, teen and now sorta-pseudo sophisticated collegian.  Our family traditions have been uniquely mundane and simple.  We measure the success of that plan by Kid’s insistence over the past 4-5 years that we NOT change a thing.

Mizzus has a highly emotional love-hate relationship with holiday decorating.  She loves to do it and loves complaining about how much hassle it is.  Kid and I understand the whole cycle and play along telling her she “doesn’t have to do it this year” all the while confident that she will, which she does.  It all somehow has worked now for 20 years.  As Mizzus shoved the last box of mantle decorations back into the guest bedroom closet on Sunday I reminded her “you know you don’t have to go to so much trouble next year.  Really, you don’t.”  She mumbled an invective.  That plan to “go away for Christmas next year” will resurface again in August.

Oh, I “hit a homer” this season with a pair of matching “sleep suits” for Mizzus and Kid.  They are microfleece and “have feet” (but no button flap).  Mizzus’ is pink.  Kid’s is blue with little ducks on it.  I got the latest Clive Cussler novel ….. and other stuff.

OK …. That column title!  Kid gave me the DVD to Heroes – Season One.  She had measured the level of blood, gore, action and adventure as reaching the level of “I bet Dad would like this”.  It was a stretch as I am not really a sci-fi fan.  Heroes is not at all what I thought it was.  If you have ever received a DVD set to a TV series you now the drill ….. 3-4 nights of staying up until 3 AM telling each other …. “just one more episode.”  The period between December 25 and Dec 28 are a murky blur as we got about 7 hours sleep total but “the Heroes” did indeed “Save the cheerleader” and “saved the world”.  Of America’s three most addictive TV series – “24” – “Heroes” – “Lost” we are now veteran addicts to the first two.

If you enjoy this column because BobLee’s tastes and opinions seem in harmony with your own then you’ll enjoy Heroes.  My fave character is Hiro the goofy Japanese kid.

I took a break from Heroing in mid-week to go “malling”.   I did 95% of my shopping on-line this year because my anti-social personality is at its peak in mid-December.  Fighting the mall mobs is a seasonal tradition I eschew along with slamming my hand in a car door.  But I did want to check out the After-Christmas Sales.

Unlike women for whom “shopping” is a sport not unlike “channel surfing” is for men, I truly despise “aimless shopping”.  Now I do go out to get “necessities” like a fifth duffel bag, a third Ipod Nano or a second leather jacket ….. “stuff” I really need, but I have maxed out on mindless consumption.  To simply buy “because its on sale” or “just because” is no longer a vice I must confront.

I’m not sure which of Gail Sheehey’s “Passages” I am in now but I get more pleasure from hauling a load of “stuff” I don’t use/wear any more to Goodwill than I do hauling in a load of “new stuff”.  

I spent two plus hours in a mall and walked out empty-handed.  No applause please.  A nation full of BobLees would be the end of capitalism as well as other Apocalyptic disasters.

Ever wonder what makes a former CIA Director laugh?  Who hasn’t wondered that, huh.  I’m sitting in the “sitting room” at this Bald Head Island Bed & Breakfast and George Tenet walks up.  This B&B is kinda quirky, like most B&Bs.  I could tell that George was a tad frustrated by the quirkiness of the place so I reminded him that ….

“Staying at a B&B is like dating a really pretty girl with lots of latent mental problems…. It’s kinda refreshing in the very beginning but be sure it ends before she grabs a meat cleaver.”         

George laughed and asked if he could “use that one”.  I said sure ….. if he would teach me how to waterboard a terrorist.  Bartering is a wonderful way to accumulate knowledge and new skills.

 Tomorrow (Tuesday) WPTF wants me to do a 2008 Pre-Vue radio interview.  Like my new best friends on “Heroes” I’ll call on my amazing powers to forecast what loonies, fruitcakes and squirrels will grace our lives in the months to come.   ….. For sure the next 11 months will be THE  most disgusting political campaign in American history.  You will be encouraged by the mainstream media at every turn to ratchet up the level of hate you already have for those who do not share your ideological views.  A nation in upheaval just a tad short of martial law and anarchy fits the mainstream media’s agenda for creating socio-cultural chaos.

We shall endeavor to provide an often whimsical alternative for you right here.

I have my set of New Year’s Resolutions for this website but I shall not reveal them.  Choosing instead for you to gradually see them manifest themselves.  As BobLee shifts his focus a tad, hopefully few babies will be tossed out with the bathwater.

I GUARANTEE you I’m gonna have a good time in 2008.  You’re always welcome to come along for the ride.

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