Eerie …. Thursday afternoon I was in an e-discussion with a prominent Wake Forest Deacon when the news broke about Skip Prosser. We were analyzing the state of Deacon sports, he from an inside and me from an outside, albeit legendary, perspective. Our analysis and observations were amazingly in synch…. Then Skip Prosser died.
According to Bill Shakespeare ….. at the Funeral of Julius Caesar, Marc Antony (prior to marrying J-Lo) remarked “The evil that men do lives after them. The good is often interred with their bones ….”. Marc, to his everlasting credit, obviously never read “sports message boards”.
I was/am a Skip Prosser fan. Everything I observed first hand or was told by credible sources substantiated Skip Prosser as a hail fellow well-met succeeding (for the most part) in a highly competitive and unforgiving “fish bowl” profession. As validation for my Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval for Skip was that he met Ron Wellman’s standards of solid guy.
While I like Skip Prosser a lot …. And like Jim Grobe a whole lot. I have Ron Wellman on an ethereal level of such heights that his handmaidens have wings and halos. Athletics Director Wellman makes good hires like Tiger Woods makes six foot putts on Sunday …. They are gimmes.
Go back in these archives a couple of years ….. I am on record as lauding and applauding Skip Prosser while he was vertical and able to appreciate kind words on his behalf.
Confirming the initial reports Thursday afternoon, affirmng them to be accurate (DYING is not yet a laughing matter in our Silly Sound Bite Society, is it?) I had a quick “I wonder ???”
Let’s go back to noon on Thursday last. Skip, just back from an AAU tourney in Vegas, is lacing up his sneaks for his daily jog. As he does so lets imagine Cletus From Lillington using the code name WuffRam4eVer starts a thread on both PackPride and InsideCarolina “What do you think of Skip Prosser?” Can you imagine the slanderous carnage that would immediately gush from those dueling septic tanks of goggle-eyed ignorance?
WuffLoons would start spewing spittle about “that no-account Skip Prosser ordered Chris Paul to grab Jules in the Hodge family jewels …. blah blah blah…”
CaroLoons would chime in that “that no-account Skip Prosser obviously cheated in getting those recent blue chippers away from Roy because …… blah blah blah…”
Throw in numerous shovelsful of typical message board effluent and Skip Prosser would come across looking like Felonious Stooge #3 along with Jimbo The Weasel and Arlo “Crash” Nifong. Except in Skip’s case …. It’s all lies, lies and more lies fabricated on the Cyber Short Bus by Cletus From Lillington and his cross-eyed cronies …… but then Skip Prossser died.
Quicker than you can say “Bill Clinton carrying a Bible” the message board morons were going all faux-pious and blubbering “I always loved him. He was my favorite rival coach …. Blah blah blah…”. (That special Bible Clinton started carrying after MonicaGate actually had a centerfold. I bet you never knew that). ….. so the way to be popular with the InterNuts is simply TO DIE.
Skip Prosser was a good man succeeding in a darn nigh on to impossible job BEFORE 1:15 PM on Thursday. Neither his memory nor his family need the faux-pious squawks of Cletus From Lillington and his board cronies. …… At least a few board loonies were true to their repulsive ilk. The EMTs were still using the defibrillator on Skip when the first CaroLoon posted Roy should call those recruits and snatch’em away from Skip “while he’s sick”.
And among the Deacons there are some two-faces too. Skip’s on-court shortcomings the past two seasons was stirring up some grumblings in Camel City. That is all forgiven now of course …. As it should be. Skip Prosser was a good man. Any time we lose “good men” society is diminished.
…. While Satan hisownself is eternal, his acolyte in West Derm is not. Someday “Rosemary’s Other Baby” will not only pass Dean’s win total but will die. Anyone want to speculate how rival board monkies will deal with that event??? Even Yeah Olde Legend will expire at some point. I would say “on the third day he will arise and sitteth at the right hand of Frank McGuire …” but since Grand Shaman Seymour has Deano on some rather obtuse “salvation path” no one is quite sure where he might end up. ….. maybe as a gargoyle on Elizabeth Edwards’ Poverty Castle.
BobLee has found himself “a new good’un” to play with. As Jimbo does the perp walk on Monday and Arlo, sporting his new Van Dyke, heads into Round Three of “why ultimately it does not pay to be stoopid” ….. yours truly needs a new “Public Enemy # ___ “ to bat around. “Ladies & Gentlemen …. Welcome RANDY PARTON”. Surely you remember Randy. He headlined at the Ramada Inn in Salisbury in 1983.
As Platinum Pals already know, Randy “Yes, HER Brother” Parton is front man for Scam-a-Lot at Exit 171 on I-95.
On I-95 just south of the VA / NC border is The Randy Parton Theatre & Money Pit. Dolly’s ne-er-do-well little bro has partnered up with some local shysters named Watson, Scott and Dunlow and NC Guv-Wannabee Richy Richard Moore and $20,000,000 of taxpayers dollars to produce “South Of The Border – North”. EXCEPT unlike the marketing genius that created that lovely (and successful) Tijuana Theme Park in Dillon SC, these Roanoke Rapids scammers are playing with “house money”.
“HER Brother” Randy is “a Country Star” (cough cough). Hell …. my book Braggin Rites has sold more copies than Randy Parton has sold records. What does that make me? Move over John Grisham and Stephen King!
We’ll fill you in on the yucky details in the weeks to come. BobLee’s boots will be on the ground up in Halifax County next week for a first hand looky see.
The Boss Hogg we want to nail in this is NOT “HER Brother” Randy but Richy Richard Moore. Richy Richard is lining up to play Obama to Beverly “Boop” Perdue’s Hillary in the upcoming NC Guv race. Richy is a dashingly handsome silverspoon and “Beverly Boop” Perdue is Jones Street’s answer to Rue McClanahan in Golden Girls …. A baby booming flirty wench fulla style but really low on substance “The Perky Katie of Candidates” …. More on “Beverly Boop” later too.
……. confirming once again We ain’t NEVER running out of material around here …. NEVER NEVER NEVER.