Hey BobLee, What About _____?

March21/ 2006

….. Soooo many e-mails lately about all sorts of stuff. …. BobLee lets you, the Greatest Free Subscribers in the history of the Internet, determine today’s comments….  I did put a moratorium of only seven questions containing the word “Sexton” or PSLs.

Are you excited about the future of Duke Football? 

A:   Its Impossible not to be.  Joe Alleva specifically mentioned the long overdue refurbishing of Wally Wade restrooms.  I had given up hope of ever seeing such in my lifetime

Who will be America’s Next President? 

A: …. Tom Brady ….. VP?  That slick fielding shortstop for the Colorado Rockies.

Will F-Bomb Alley EVER be cleaned up?  

  A: Yes …. The day after Mrs Oblinger and Mrs Fowler dress up in Carolina Blue and try to walk thru it.  Not until then.

What do F-Bomb Alley hooligans want to be when they grow up?

A: Gate D thugs at NY Jets’ games. …. Or sofa salesmen in Morgantown.

Will abject hatred of Coach K increase this year?  

  A:  Yes.  Why?  Because Chuck Amato is no longer around.  Irrational hatred is like fruitcake.  It can neither be created nor destroyed, simply moved around.  All that Chuck Hate has to go somewhere and Dickie can’t absorb any more.  Ergo, it will go to Coach K.  He can handle it.

Will Jimbo The Weasel ever “be back”?   

  A:  Jimbo never left.  Check the DNA on that Jones Street hot dog vendor

When will PSLs in some form come to Kenan?  

  A:  The week after Dickie retires.  Even from his Kure Beach retirement cottage, Prince Tassel Loafer will haunt his legion of fans. 

Whatever happened to Mark Mangino and Todd Reesing?

A: Who.

   BobLee, Have you ever eaten at Crook’s Corner?

  A:  I will TONIGHT (Tues) …. with one Mizzus, three Liberals and one intrepid sideline reporter. 

Since Butch got $300,000 for going 4-8, what will Algroh get for going 9-3?

A: A lifetime plus ten extension …. And Howie Long gets to live rent-free at Monticello forever.

What did Tar Heels obsess over before there was a “Coach K?   

  A:  There never was a “before Coach K”.

When UNC does start charging for “the right” to buy Kenan season tickets, will you start charging for BobLeeSays subscriptions?  

  A:  Not unless I can figure out how to add skyboxes to my Home page.

Will Jim Grobe ever leave Wake for a “Big Time Program”?   

  A:  No.  But since UNC will not play WFU for the next three years Tar Heel fans will totally forget about him.  Out of sight, out of mind.

Is Cam SEXTON related to Jimmy?

  A: If he was do you think T.J. Yates would have ever taken a snap this year?

Will the Hollywood writers strike end in time for Jack Bauer to save Western Civilization again?

A:  Alas, Jack and his CTU pals “jumped the shark” last year and are now passé.  Speaking of “sharks”, Sebastian Stark is now the coolest hero in TV Land.

 Is Mizzou the next College Football Dynasty? 

A:  Too early to say.  A lot depends on who Duke and Southern Mississippi end up hiring. 

Whatever happened to Marvelous Marvin Sanders aka The Greatest Coordinator in The History of Coordinating? 

  A: I think Mark Mangino ate him.

What will John Edwards’ next career be?

  A: Wearing his Alexander Julian “Everyman” wardrobe of scruffy jeans and flannel shirt (with the sleeves rolled-up two turns), John will become a riveter on the Kenan 70,000 Project.  Courageous Elizabeth will pack his lunch every day ….. caviar & a moon pie.

Who will be UNC’s next Chancellor?

A:  Jimmy Sexton hasn’t decided yet.  He offered it to Jim Grobe but Grobe won’t come unless Ron Wellman gets Erskine’s job.

How much do Mizzu loonies love Gary Pinkel?  

  A:  Apparently A LOT!  If he loses Saturday night, they will wait until Tuesday to start firegarypinkel.com 

Who do you think was “Jack The Ripper”?  

  A:  I KNOW who it was …… Dave Huxtable

 What will The Meez’s next job be?  

  A:  Chauffeuring John Edwards to work every day on the Kenan 70,000 Project.

When Islamo-fascists take over America, what aspects of our culture might survive?

  A:  Fruitcakes, Internet message boards, and dust bunnies

When John Edwards gets thru riveting 10,000 extra seats to Kenan/Sexton Memorial Stadium, where will the extra people park?

  A:  They won’t.  Ehringhaus Dorm will “go condo” and the extra 10,000 will have to live there. 

Did “Chase” Daniel and The “Colts” McCoy and Brennan ever really have a choice of what they would be?   

  A:  Actually yes.  Either QBs or extras on Walker-Texas Ranger.

Was Bruton Smith “just bluffing” about moving Lowe’s Motor Speedway? 

  A: Bruton doesn’t “bluff”.  He rapes, pillages, obliterates and “nukes”.

Whatever happened to Officer Swain “The Tailgate Nazi”? 

  A:  He is the night watchman for Elizabeth Edwards’ racquetball court.

Who will succeed Dickie as UNC AD?

  A:  Jimmy Sexton hasn’t decided that one yet either.  Jim Grobe has already said no.  Tom Stafford’s agent has asked Jimmy to “do lunch”.

Where will the $150,000,000 for Kenan 70,000 come from? 

A:  (1) Change found under the sofa cushions at Graham Memorial and (2) An annuity started by the Franklin Street flower ladies….. and (3) Installation of Pay-Urinals in Kenan.

Who killed Sean Taylor?  

  A:  We’ll know within an hour …. If Horatio Caine and Calleigh are assigned to the case.

Who will be the next HC of The Panthers?  

  A:   Jim Grobe ! ….. just kidding!  I vote for that other Deacon, Ricky Proehl.  Just so long as he’s not related to Jim Black.

   OK BobLee, if you’re so smart, how would you pay Coach-For-Life Butch (and Jimmy)?

  A:  Easy …. straight commission.  $250,000 per W …. payable 5 minutes after each W at midfield with a wheelbarrow full of Euro-Dollars.

Will UNC ever play USC at BOA?   

  A:  Yes …. When Jimmy Sexton buys BOA.  His two clients, Steve and Butch will then split the concessions and parking revenues.

Will Mikey Nifong ever really “go away”?  

  A:  Not as long as I have this website.

When will TO’B pass Al Michaels and Tom Reed in total NCSU Ws?  

  A:  I think he passed both with that Wofford W.

Will “Smiling John” Tenuta be the next HC at GaTech?  

   A:  No, Smiling John will be Secretary of Defense in President Brady’s Administration.

How many people will be on Joe Alleva’s Coach Selection Committee?  

  A:  88 of course.

What REALLY happened to Melanie Sill?  

  A:   We won’t know for sure until we can check Mark Mangino’s stomach contents.

When the US Open returns to Pinehurst for the fourteenth time in 2050, what will be the main storyline?  

  A: Still Payne Stewart …. It’s a law.

When will Silent Sam REALLY fire his rifle?   

  A: When Coach-For-Life Butch actually breaks ground on his Chapel Hill McMansion in The Oaks.  That “virgin” story was a ruse started by Pete Gaudet.

BobLee, could you keep doing these silly questions FOREVER?   

  A:  Actually No ….. only  until Jimmy Sexton admits “money isn’t everything”.

Say “Good Night …. Elizabeth.”


 Can you name SEVEN Duke FB coaches not named Wallace? 


    UNC’s two Sons of Heismans were Tony Blanchard and Clint Frank Jr.  Tony (son of Doc) was a TE for Dooley …. Clint (son of Clint) was a reserve in ’65-’66.

    BobLee, which of the above questions are your favorites?  The one about “Chase & Colt” and the one about “88 members of Alleva’s Committee” ….. but I liked’em all or they wouldn’t be here.  Which was YOUR favorite?

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