Permission Denied BUT

BobLee
January18/ 2000

… For the past few weeks the reader e-mails have been slowing building with the same question.  It seems many of you are seeking BobLee’s permission relative to an upcoming event of some interest to area sports fans.  While I cannot, in good conscience, grant my approval to your request; I do have a MUCH more attractive alternative for your consideration. … AND we catch up on several under the radar issues.

National Signing Day (next Wednesday – February 7) has somehow become a major holiday for many.  OK, mini of that many are not exactly burdened with a ton of real adult responsibilities, but even discounting those wretched mini-masses, there are legitimate adult fans who get excited about what color ballcap Billy Bluechip gonna pull outta his bag right there in the school cafeteria.  Yee Haa, WE GOT US A 5-STAR !!! … HOT DAMN!  Wasn’t that how Tar Heels orgasmed over Jarrell Miller a year ago?  WHO?  Who Indeed.  Oops … thud, clank.

The annual mass migration of 100s of functional illiterates to scores of snooty paragons of academic eliteness … all in the name of mutual hypocrisy … GOTTA LUV IT!

I don’t understand it.  If I had the power I would make it a felony to discuss “recruiting” in any media form.  I don’t have that power YET but I’m working on it.

Meanwhile this year’s signing day is coming up – NEXT WEDNESDAY!  Many of you are sincerely interested in how many Bluechips The Pale Rider will corral in Year One Of Awakening The Sleeping Giant.  Expectations are high with some reasonable justification.

Most of you know my feelings on this.  I realize that on-field success in intercollegiate athletics at the highest level is predicated on recruiting the best available athletic talent.  I got no problem with that.  Putting a man on the moon is predicated on having the best aerospace engineers on the project.  My objection is the system that makes ego-overloaded rock stars out of 18 y/os with 4th grade reading comprehension.

Recruiting gurus and their goggle-eyed minions should be interned on a glacier in the Arctic with naught but a duffle bag full of multi-colored ballcaps and one order of surf & turf.  OK, all of’em except Dave Glenn and Brick Oettinger who I happen to like.  They can stay. …. Doing away with freshman eligibility would solve much of the problem, but that’s not happening in any of our lifetimes.

I can’t get the glacier internment plan in place for this year, so whatchagonnado?

The question you’re all asking is:

BobLee, is it all right for a normal person to go to the stoopid message boards on Signing Day.  Just that one day then I promise to not do it anymore?”

That is like asking me

BobLee, is it OK if I sprinkle used kitty litter over my Frosted Flakes tomorrow morning … just this once.  I’m curious how it might taste? …

Or “BobLee, can I go into one of those concrete block buildings with the XXX ADULT VIDEO signs out front?  I want to know how Debbie Does Dallas.”  

   Or “BobLee, is it OK if I sell my teenage daughter to a Saudi if I can get enough $$$ for her to buy myself an X-Box?

Folks, I am not your intellectual arbiter.  OK, I am, but only as much as you allow me to be.  I realize a % of you are actually hard-core board loonies … card carrying Shineolas … addicted as much to this site as you are to the cyber septic fields on Message Board Land.

What I can do … and will do in the next 20 seconds, is give you a much more attractive alternative than dumpster diving on the boards.

Those much maligned guys in the UNC Sports Marketing & Sports Information & Radio Network have come up with a whizbang deal for you.  I even signed up for it on Wednesday.  I put down my $4.95 … which is $4.95 MORE than I’ve paid to see seven BB games so far this season in The Legend’s Lair.

  • Would you rather hear facts and first person real time comments from people who really KNOW SOMETHING or would you rather read SluggoDaHeel and Ramalicious749 flatulate their bottomless ignorance? 
  • Do you want your information coming directly from Butch in his 4th floor big fishtank office … or from BigChooChoo in his mamma’s basement.
  • I’m 100% sure Butch will be wearing pants.  No such guarantee with the Shineolas.
  • It’s a no-brainer … go with the no-brain gang or with the pros in Kenan.

Sign up NOW!  …. Go to TarHeelBlue.com and click the Signing Day Link on the right.

 

CAROLINA FOOTBALL SIGNING DAY LIVE

  • 4 ½ hours of Live broadcast coverage from inside Kenan Football Center
  • Live interviews with Butch Davis and assistant coaches throughout the day 
  • Features on all coaching staff members 
  • Official Announcements of Carolina Football signees 
  • Signee features with Carolina coaches comments 
  • Live coverage of Butch Davis press conference 

BE THE FIRST TO KNOW ON SIGNING DAY… THE ONLY PLACE YOU’LL SEE IT LIVE

Hey there BobLee … are they paying you to use your influence to hype this thing?  YEAH, RIGHT!  Prince Tassel Loafer is gonna personally deliver me the check and Ol’ Woodrow will be personally thanking me on TTHRN! … when Rush delivers the commencement address at UNC!

Incidentally, I used to name all the hard-working bright young fellas on the UNC expanded Sports Marketing team but a problem has developed.  The ones I mentioned first were fine, but the ones at the end of the list claimed I liked the front guys better.  Not true but I can’t create such dissension on the team.  I suppose I could single out the 3-4 quite constipated yahoos over there that DON’T much like me, but why bother.  They’ll be retiring soon enough.

 >>><<<

   Am I the only one that has noticed that in the old days (aka The Burly John & Chuckles Era) about now we would be hearing all sorts of nefarious tales (from both sides) of CHEATING and ILLEGALITIES and OH ME, OH MY … but this year … nuthin’.  Like I said when The Pale Rider and Semper Fi were both hired.  The Adults have taken charge of UNC and NCSU Football …. Yip Yip Yahoo! 

>>><<<

   Speaking of All’s Quiet … not much noise coming out of Derm County Court House … have you noticed?  Since Crash NumbNutz went back to his specialty of plea bargaining drive-by gangstas back on the street, we don’t get our daily quota of abject idiocy.  It’s a shame when someone you’ve grown to enjoy is relegated back to the oblivion he so well deserves.

Attorney General Roy Cooper is orchestrating the resolution to The Nifong Mess so that it will appear to the easily buffaloed registered voters among the African American Lynch Mob (and equally as clueless Gang of 88)  that his staff really poured over the non-existant evidence before dismissing it all.  He has delayed the next court hearing until May at the request of the national media circus.  The front steps of Derm County Court House are bad enough anytime but better in May than February.

>>><<< 

   I’ll be pulling for Peyton on Sunday.  I can hear the whines already … yeah, Peyton won it ONCE but he can’t win it again …

>>><<< 

   Oh, a Shineola story I’ve been meaning to share.  Over the recent Christmas / New Years Holidays I got an e-mail from one of the original 1,000 … a BobLee Buddy from waaay back in the GoHeels.com days.  This guy is a walking archive of BobLee’s Opines on Everything … and he also occupies one of THE most exalted occupational niches in all of society … he be a surgeon.  No, not a sturgeon … A SURGEON.  He’s a for real Doctor, not one of those make-believe PhD kind that sign letter-ads and hold votive candles.  So, anyhow I hear from Dr BobLee Buddy a month ago …

BobLee, I’ve sinned.  You warned me, I KNOW.  But I just finally got curious about the message boards.  Honestly, I had never been to one of those websites.  I had way to much time on my hands recently and decided to check one out.  HOLY CRAP BobLee … WHO ARE THOSE PEOPLE?  To say they are nutz is an insult to the mentally ill.  I’ve never read such insane trash in my life!  Please tell me nobody with any authority over anything pays any attention to those nuts.  Your warned me, I know.  Now I feel so unclean.  As you would say BobLee … YIKES!”

My reply …. Bwahahaha … kinda makes you rethink that sanctity of life oath, don’t it?  Doc, all I can say is I’m filing your comments in my I Told You So file with the almost verbatim notes I’ve received from Judges, Lawyers, Engineers, Architects, CPAs, CEOs, ADs, Generals, Pastors, … and a guy on Death Row who wants to get 10 minutes alone w/ SluggoFromJersey584.

Sign up for that Signing Day Deal … RIGHT NOW!  It’s a good deal or I would not recommend it. … go to www.tarheelblue.com

>>><<<

 Who was The Voice of The Tar Heels before Woody Derm ???

>>><<<

   The original Coral Bay Club Pool was SALTWATER …  I think they converted it after a hurricane a few decades ago.

   Mark Wahlberg WAS an original New Kid On The Block but quit the band before they hit it big.

   The Memphis USFL team was The Showboats.

   NO ONE knows, or cares, what parenthetical means.

   BobLee’s Speaking Calendar is filling up faster than FlyPaper at a picnic. Woo Hoo!

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