HAPPY ANNIVERSARY – yeah, right!

January18/ 2000

March 13 … just another day … or an anniversary of the Day that changed “The Triangle”…. Used to if you told someone you were “from North Carolina” you braced for Mayberry jokes or maybe NASCAR jibes.  One get numb to those, smiles a tired smile and maybe returns their volley with an equally lame comment about New York, The MidWest, Florida, California, Mississippi or wherever you happen to be.   That was all 366 days ago … BEFORE March 13, 2006 ….

I don’t normally like to put one column right on top of another.  It gets the flavors of each all contaminated like storing ice cream with the onions …. yucko!  But I can’t really hold this one back since today is today …. March 13.


   If I had my druthers … I’d sure druther be linked with Barney, Gomer, and Cousin Goober and Ernest T … and King Richard, Dale, and Rusty …. Than with Mike Nifong.    Yes my friends … today is


The 1st Anniversary of 

“The Party at 610 N. Buchanan Boulevard”

…. Absolutely a “day of infamy” whose impact and stench will linger longer than anyone would wish for or ever imagine.  Yes, you’re right … it was two weeks later when the story broke WORLDWIDE.  Before that it sat in a Derm police report In-box … a ho & john deal gone sour in the lower end of Derm’s retail luv bizness …. then Mikey Nifong got ahold of it …. and THEN:

366 days ago you (and me) probably didn’t think too much about District Attorneys.  They were the lawyers on TV that went against Perry Mason or Johnny Cochrane and the other flamboyant defense attorneys.  District Attorneys were “on our side” and tried to put away the evil doers.  Perry Mason ALWAYS beat Hamilton Berger …. Johnny Cochrane made mincemeat of Marcia Clark … the heroic defense attorneys usually pulled some dramatic courtroom histrionics and saved the falsely accused while ferreting out the real evil-doer.  All in 60 minutes.

We had old friends stop by last week on their way to Hilton Head.  Conrad and Debbie live on Cape Cod and were buddies of mine and The Mizzus during our days in Worcester Mass … in the pre-Kid stage of our life.  Conrad is a veteran of the magazine business having started several lifestyle and alternative newspapers and magazines over the years.

As we were catching up, something was said prompting Conrad to ask “What’s the deal with the Duke Lacrosse Mess?”  They pretty much knew all the major gory details …. The idiot DA … the rich white boys … the bizarro “exotic dancers” … et al.  I, of course, added a few BobLee tidbits to their knowledge base.

This website being the first place it was suggested “THEY ARE HOs FOR GAWD SAKES!” .  Along with the two warnings that became oh so prophetic as the days became weeks became months become today a year ….  For the sake of newbees those two warnings were:

  1. See if either Reverend Jesse or Reverend Al actually set foot in Derm.  If they don’t it’s because they smell a Tawana and don’t want to be linked to it.   Its been a year boys and girls and ain’t nary one of the Revs actually been to Derm.  Score one for moi.  Yes, Jesse offered to pay Precious’ tuition but he did it in a TV interview from Chicago …. And NEVER sent the tuition check either but you knew that would be the case. …. and of course they did not.
  2. I’ve known my share of obnoxious privileged preppies.  No preppie can get drunk enough (and still stay conscious) that will stick his you-know-what up a black hooker’s you-know-where.  He might hurl epithets and be incredibly stoopid and obnoxious but he ain’t gonna do the nasty … no how, no way. …. and of course they did not.

Then there was the day Malik Shabazz and his jack-booted Panthers sashayed into Derm and Ol’ BL was on the scene … walking backwards down Gregson Street while reading off Malik’s DEMANDS to a national radio audience of 15,000,000.  That was quite cool indeed.

We all watched as The Old Reliable simply melted before our very eyes.  A relatively well-respected regional newspaper morphed into little more than a tabloid rag that was hardly worthy of wrapping fish or lining a birdcage.  Orage Quarles never did “give that speech” that real publishers give when they sense “a Big One”.  He was handed a slam dunk Pulitzer and he dropped it … and like Humpty Dumpty … all the King’s horses and men can not restore credibility to his enterprise.

While the N&O thought that the price of Long Island real estate was germane to the story … BobLee kinda thought the name of Precious and Kim’s employer was worth telling.  Bunny Hole Entertainment …. just another place you call for a $25 BJ until their phone rang around 10 PM …. one year ago today. ….. RIIIINNNGGG!  “Bunny Hole Entertainment … cash only … we got’em in all sizes and colors, what’s your pleasure?”

And BobLee Meets Dr Cathy of The Gang of 88 …. From across a vast chasm two opposing warriors in a never-ending ideological war dialogued.  It was more impactful than Jimmy Carter’s Camp David Accords but likely less so than Yalta.  Prehaps a seed of mutual respect was sown … time will tell.

The unveiling of “Crash Nifong & Precious” that unforgettable photoshopped Bull Durham poster that got less views than Britany going commando … but not too many less.

   Indeed, its been a helluva year ….. and there’s still the final chapters left to write.  Where will “Under The Bus” Broadhead and “Mikey” be in 1-2-3 years.  Will Crazy Cuzzin Jackie get her very own Nail Salon … will Kim The Embezzler be appointed Auditor for Derm County?  Will Precious Mangum get a TV-movie and will Beyonce or Halle get the starring role?  Will “the rich white boys” from those expensive houses get their lives back on track and go forward?  Will their families sue Duke and Derm County for bazillions and bazillions? …. Who da heck knows …

BUT …. You do know who’ll be pretty doggone close to whatever happens whenever it does happen … and who will be layin’ it on you right here on this cyber platter.  BobLee’s been there from the get-go and BobLee’ll be there til it gets-gone.

We’re not the only ones celebrating Nifong Day.  That aforementioned fish wrapper has a quite interesting interview with The Prince of Darkness HisOwnDiabolicalSelf …. Coach K and his role (or lack of) in this glorious mess.  While I’d love to offer my thoughts on it …. I’m all Coach K’ed out right now.

Here’s the link.  Its gonna piss off most of you because its about Coach K and anything about Coach K is guaranteed to piss off about 99% of you otherwise sometimes rational human beings.


 Maybe I’ll talk about it later …. Yeah, I likely will.


   It should come as no surprise to any of you that the bottom-feeding scum from WuffNation are doing their worst to emulate the bottom feeding scum from TarHeelNation from last week.  Yes …. The same incredibly stoopid threats and slurs and unspeakable idiocy is spewing out of their sewers about Ty Lawson and UNC that festered and percolated just last week about Gerald Henderson and Coach K.  Raleigh’s local CBS affiliate was SHOCKED at how vile these lunatics can be … I’m not.

I’m in touch with Barry “Sportin’ Life” Saunders hoping to keep him from going off in the wrong direction on this …. PLUS …. I’ll be on WPTF Wednesday at 8:40 AM to appeal to the mainstream sports fans across the Triangle of all allegiances to remain calm and realize these Internet jackasses are not normal people “like us”.  If you read their putrid crap you will be affected by it ….. it’s the vilest form of sports porn … and it WILL effect how you view all members of whichever fan base is supposedly being represented by this human garbage.  It was UNC last week … its NC State this week ….. same species of sickos just a different color jersey.


    Those silly folks down on South McDowell done done it AGAIN …. Tuesday night those scamps posted a story on-line about the latest grisly family murder in Johnston County.  If its not Fathers decapitating babies, its nut jobs shooting his kids are chopping up his wife or gardner or lord knows who and what …. its a wonder Jason Vorheres and Freddie Kruger aren’t Grand Marshalls in the Selma Christmas Parade.  Must be something kinky in the water over there. ……

   so anyways ….. a 35-year old nutjob shoots his children and himself ….. and those journalistic imps write the lead story as ….

Father, Two Children Found Dead in Car
CLAYTON – A 35-year-old white man, his 6-year-old daughter and his 4-year-old son were found dead in the man’s Honda Accord east of Clayton early this afternoon, authorities said.

   yes, indeed, those color-blind knee-jerking hypocrites at the N&O felt it germane to note the man’s COLOR …. not race but COLOR in the lead paragraph.  Using their now infamous “wearing a do-rag” code, you’d a thought they would say …. “a 35-year old man who couldn’t dunk, had no rhythm, liked NASCAR and Country Music and Slim Whitman albums …. killed himself and his children ……” …. They beat all down at the N&O.  You know that.  I BLASTED THEIR BUTTS …. it got changed right fast.

   I don’t have a stumper today …. make up your own and send me the answer and I”ll try and guess a question. …… don’t go and get too wild and crazy at your Nifong Day Party tonight.

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