Willie Scroggs’ Prophecy Revealed

January17/ 2000

   Four years ago I sat down with UNC Associate Athletics Director Willie Scroggs to discuss UNC Football Gameday Policies.  From deep in the bowels of The Smith Center, I recall Willie’s prophetic words … “There are two types of schools … (1) Those that have had a bad alcohol related incident … and (2) Those that WILL have a bad alcohol related incident.”  Willie had fresh memories of a UNC coed death and a fatal fraternity house fire.  This past Saturday NC State moved from Column B to Column A.

   Poor little Dickie Baddour gets pummeled for every inconceivable oversight, insight, malfeasance, fumble, parking ticket and double dribble within ten nautical miles of The Old Well.  High on the lists of “It’s that damn Baddour’s fault” list is “the alcohol policy on the UNC campus”.  

According to the Official Baddour Bashers Manual:

   “Dickie wants to so over-regulate fan behavior on Football Saturdays that no one will come to the games anymore and he won’t have to pay to have people clean up trash in Kenan, thereby saving labor $$$. That cost savings will then be channeled to Basketball which will appease the Basketball First & Forever Cabal of Fat Cats who secretly control the University” … of course, silly!

   In truth (YIKES … that word!) Dickie does not have a single solitary input into UNC campus policy on alcohol.  He is not on any secret temperance committee, nor does his brother own the O”Doul’s distributorship in Orange County.  Such policies are established by the UNC Board of Governors and respective Boards of Trustees and are consistent with policies governing state-owned educational institutions across the state of North Carolina.  Yes but … no buts … it ain’t up to Dickie Baddour PERIOD!

   6-7 years ago an overly aggressive UNC Security Officer earned ever-lasting infamy by giving an open container, and under-age, citation to a relative of a UNC BOT member in the Fat Cat Parking Lot on a Football Saturday.  This be the legendary “Officer Swain”.  Contrary to Baddourian Legend, this incident did NOT delight Dickie nor fit into his grand conspiracy.  It ranks right along with Ol’ Roy saying no that first time … and losing that freakin’ bell to Duke on Dickie’s list of nightmares.

   The aforementioned “Officer Swain” still haunts the UNC campus.  He is protected by numerous politically correct affirmative action statutes which he carries on a laminated card in his wallet at all times.  UNC can fire coaches every 3-4 years for any manner of marginal performances but “Officer Swain” ain’t going nowhere.

   Maybe we can get him transferred over to West Raleigh to police the Trinity Road “free parking lots” on Wolfpack Saturdays.

   In case you don’t read the damn N&O or watch ESPN … there was a terrible incident this past Saturday involving fans attending the Wolfpack home opener.

   Thumbnailing it … two punks were cruising thru the Trinity Road tailgating areas near Carter-Finley at what witnesses claim was a dangerous rate of speed.  Several people attempted to persuade them to modify their behavior.  Words were exchanged and possibly fisticuffs.  The punks left and returned with a pistol … fatally shooting two people in the parking lot.  The punks have been apprehended and identified by eye-witnesses.  Two young men are dead and two others will likely spend the rest of their lives in prison … and a cloud of confusion and sadness hangs over NC State, Carter-Finley Stadium, The NC State Fairgrounds, and Raleigh.

   That this was connected to a Wolfpack Football game is purely coincidental.  The “punks” were not interested in football but simply being connected with an unsupervised public party in an unsecured area.  Apparently the specific parking lot where the incident occurred is not within “anyone’s” jurisdiction … which seems a bit strange don’t you think.      

   I have followed considerable discussion of this incident among State fans.  The specific area in question has a reputation as an “anything goes … enter at your own risk … no man’s land”. Random reports of hooliganism at State games center around this area … DUH!

   I try to attend 1-3 games at C-F each Fall. I always park in the Weston Office Park area off of Blue Ridge Road.  I have never had a bit of trouble … never been flipped “the bird” … nor ever encountered anyone but salt-of-the-earth fans and families intent on a good day of Football and fun.

   The logistics of the Carter-Finley Stadium / Fairgrounds area are ideal for assembling crowds of 60,000+ for an event.  Ingress and Egress is about as smooth as it could be with ample feeder roadways and nearby interstate highways.  Last Fall there was a fatal traffic accident following a State game.  An alcohol-impaired driver (who had NOT attended the game) hit a group of fans on the shoulder of a feeder road.  Again … that it was in any way connected to a NCState Football game is coincidental … attempts to link these incidents to NC State, Chuck Amato, land grant colleges, or AJ Davis’ Mamma reveal the abject stupidity of those trying to connect such dots.

   It may come as a surprise to some of you, but if you gave BobLee Swagger a six-pack of beer on January 1, there is a good chance there would be 3-4 left come the following Christmas.  If the six-pack came with a bag of marijuana, a fifth of whiskey, and assorted hallucinogenic agents each of these “extras” would likewise be wasted on me.  While Mizzus Swagger does enjoy her fermented grape, Ol’ Swagger is one of those “get high on life and the company of good friends” kind of guy. 

   If alcohol was banned at all sports events and public gatherings it would not affect my decision to attend any more or any less.  I don’t need to dull my inhibitions to enjoy myself.  I appreciate that mine is a minority viewpoint.

   I do have severe “Jackass-ophobia”.  People who behave like jackasses in public chap my butt whether their behavior is alcohol stimulated or not.  I advocate the public disemboweling of a jackass fan picked at random at half-time of every Big Time College Football game.  It might not scare others into behaving but it WILL get rid of 100s of Jackass fans over the course of a season.

   It has not been determined if this shooting was alcohol-related but the perpetrators have records of drug arrests.  Apparently it routinely attracts non-Football fans who come for the wild unruly public party atmosphere.  That such an area even exists waiting for such a terrible incident tells me that “somebody” has not been listening to Willie Scroggs.


   The land belongs to “somebody” likely “the State” or “the County” and needs on-site security … and needed it prior to this incident.  NC State Football is enjoying heretofore new heights of popularity … and popularity attracts “punks”.  “Punks” ALWAYS cause trouble for decent law-abiding folks.  “Causing trouble” is about all that “punks” are good at.

   Wolfpack fans are every bit as “decent, law-abiding” as any cross-section of Tar Heels, Cameron Crazies, or Purple Pirates. I say lets blame it on Meg Scott Phipps and/or out going Governor “Lottery Mike” Easley and correct the problem before the Ohio State game.  

   I know Wake County Sheriff Donnie Harrison and he’s a no-nonsense Swagger kind-of-guy.  Give Sheriff Harrison the jurisdiction and he will “punk-proof” the entire area … and he won’t even need Mario, Manny, or Freddie to help him … or “Officer Swain”.  


Swagger’s Stumper

 Speaking of “de-punking” society, we’ll repeat an old Swagger Stumper

What was “Paul Kersey’s” occupation other than vigilante?


   Jeannie C. Riley got crossways with the Harper Valley PTA … but gave those self-righteous hypocrites a piece of her mind.  Give’em hell Widow Johnson. Yes, Barbara Eden played Widow Johnson in the TV-movie of the story. 


Are you sending e-copies of SSays to EVERY one of your friends?

Why not … isn’t that what friends are for?


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