BobLee is on the firing line today. Throw out the clay pigeon subjects and he throws his Browning 12 gauge to his shoulder and fires away. More often than not he blows’em to smithereens. ACC – NFL – NHL – NBA – MLB – UNC – NCSU – et al.
UNC vs Duke … PULL!
A MUCH tougher game than now suddenly “cocky” Tar Heel fans are expecting. Even a precursory look at Duke last’s three games shows as much improvement as UNC has been making. In a “rivalry game” anything can happen … if “Mo Mentum” is wearing roller skates he could take his chosen team to a landslide … which color of blue will “Mo” be wearing on Saturday in Wallace Wade’s Concrete Mausoleum?
Does Bunting HAVE to “Beat Dook” … PULL!
Who da hell knows any more? He has earned my vote to stay … if I had a vote.
What about Spurrier? … PULL!
Lots of noise from The Chicken Coop in Columbia. It makes some sense on many sides and none on others. Swagger Says Visor Boy can make a quicker impact at USCarol than anywhere else.
Will we ever see major league hockey again in our lifetime? … PULL!
Yes … as a pre-game promotion for The National Poker League.
Rate the NFL Rookie QBs … PULL!
Big Ben = 10 … has the size and now has the confidence
PR = how much did that pre-season hold-out hurt him? Philip keeps his clipboard unless Brees goes down w/ an injury.
Eli = will get clobbered over next few games … could get very messy. Yo, Archie, make sure health insurance is paid up. Suggest Mother Manning only watch Payton’s games for rest of season.
The NBA regular season has started …PULL!
Thanks for the warning … that means the WNBA season is over! Call me again in June when Finals start. I recommend everyone read Rick Reilly’s piece in SI on Latrell Sprewell … asininity personified.
Carolina Basketball … PULL!
The Blue Messiah has HIS team on The Glory Road. There will be potholes, but Ol’ Roy in the driver’s seat now. It will only get better and better in the years to come. Marvin Williams is “the Total Package” = solid kid, excellent student, great family and a beast on the court. Ol’ Roy will make it a habit to find more like him each year.
ACC Basketball … PULL!
FOUR ACC coaches have coached in the NCAA Final game … Roy, K, Gary and now Hewitt. League way to competitive for anyone to run away from the field. Count “Road Ws” as solid gold. Whoever wins at least 5 in hostile arenas will prevail.
What about Herb and the Wuffs? … PULL!
Underrated by both his own fans and rival fans. Herb quietly putting together a solid program … bringing in good kids. Herb lacks charisma and star power to draw comparisons with “ACC Bench Divas” but he will be solid and a force to be reckoned with.
Arafat & The Red Sox … PULL!
Watching all the crazy Palestinians waiting for the helicopters to bring in Yasser’s casket I first thought … “those crazy sand monkeys are nuts” … then I remembered scenes of Red Sox fans celebrating their ALCS and WS wins. “… those crazy sand monkeys were acting like crazy Red Sox fans …”
Has Amato Era peaked in West Raleigh? … PULL!
No … that’s foolish wishin’ by foolish Heeloids. Chuck will always field very competitive teams AND he will always be turning over his staff. He will never plant the Wuff flag atop either the ACC or the BCS Mountain but neither will John Bunting or whoever coaches at either school … nor will I ever get Reilly’s gig at SI. Define success as other than perfection.
Does Barry Bonds merit all his 7 MVPs (4 in a row)? … PULL!
Yes … sure he’s juiced … has been for the past 4+ years. The last sports purist was golfer Bobby Jones. “It’s not cheating until they catch you” in the modern credo.
Will Dickie Baddour be vindicated in retrospection? … PULL!
No … which is quite sad AND the reason he should be “reassigned” ASAP. He has absorbed too much malice and vilification to ever recover. National championships in all 28 sports would be seen as “in spite of” his direction. When your primary enemy is a faceless mob of Internet loons, that enemy will never retreat nor surrender. “Opinions without consequence” are never called to task.
Will Vijay Singh be as successful in 2005 as in 2004? … PULL!
No … because the degrees of difference between the top 50 PGAers is simply too narrow. He WILL remain very good however because he practices relentlessly, stays in top shape, and is not distracted by outside interests.
Has the new NASCAR scoring system worked? … PULL!
I suppose so … HOWEVER … If Kurt Busch, Ryan Newman, Jimmy Johnson, and Matt Kenseth stood in Times Square wearing “Who Are We?” t-shirts … Maureen Dowd would guess they were Diebold voting machine repairmen. Hell, I could post their pictures here and not 5% of you could correctly identify them.
Will the Steelers be in the Super Bowl? … PULL!
No … they will lose to the Patriots in the AFC finals. Pats vs Eagles in Jaxville. Packers could catch Eagles however.
Is Condi Rice a legitimate Prez candidate in ’08? … PULL!
Yes … as further proof of the diminished power of the mainstream media intellectual elite.
Who will be “the surprise team” in ACC Basketball this season? … PULL!
There will not be a “surprise team” because any of four teams could end up on top without it being “a surprise”. It will not be Clemson or Virginia or Miami or VaTech. If I posted those four NASCAR drivers pics and you guessed “The VaTech basketball coach” you might be right … I’ve never found anyone who can name him or has ever seen him.
>>><<<
Swagger’s Stumper
When will Wimpy pay for his hamburger?
>>><<<
“Two hours of pushin’ broom buys a 8×12 4-bit room …” as sung by Roger Miller and NOT Tennessee Ernie Ford or Jimmy Dean.
SwaggerMan in Mooresville on Thurs AM … and Raintree CC in Charlotte on Fri AM.
10 … 9 … 8 … 7 … 6 … 5 … It’s getting closer and closer to BLAST OFF! … Techies tightening the last few lugnuts on Swagger’s newest Starship!
The Tell-A-Friend feature is working fine now … the damn thing got jammed somehow. C.I.S. Swagger suspects a Baddourian Conspiracy.
Comments or Questions
