Selling Our Academic Soul

January17/ 2000

Several weeks ago we established the reality that ANY degree of Football “success” in the “New ACC” is dependent upon a level playing field to acquire the same quality of on-field talent.  Achieving that level playing field via uniform admissions standards is simple.  A group e-mail among 12 Admissions Directors – BINGO!  Getting to that point … not so simple … but let’s pretend.  And we present our newest crackpot nickname – Al Bundy!

When I lived in Big 8 Country in the late 70s I used to wonder how Univ of Oklahoma alumni reconciled their pride in their degree with the antics of Barry Switzer and his hooligans.  OU MUST be a fine academic institution … Anita Hill taught at their Law School and we all remember what a shining star she was.  The same “how do da do that” would apply to UNLV under Tark and whatever passes for a college in Cincinnati with Coach Huggy The Stumbling Drunk.

NOTE: Huggy is off his probation now and back to being a role model for youth and a deadly threat to drivers on Ohio.

   I assume you use the same “situational ethics” that spouses use to cheat on each other and that federal judges do in ignoring the US Constitution … hold your nose, and convince yourself that “everybody is doing it”.  

   I am tired of hearing about and talking about “cheating in recruiting” and subsequent “on-campus shenanigans”.  I propose we consider that convenient statisticians’ trick … legalize stuff like marijuana and prostitution.  The # of arrests for those non-crimes immediately goes down.

   I’ve always been a maintain high standards kinda guy relative to college athletics. I’m not sure why in retrospect.  If UNC turned into a Switzer-type Football Factory it would not adversely affect my collegiate experience of many decades ago.  I stopped displaying my diploma by my mid-20s so no issue there.

   The issue that schools like UNC, NCSU, Duke and WFU must address is whether compromising their academic standards for 100 undergraduates truly damages their reputation.  Not all Football scholarship “student-athletes” will require a compromise, of course. I’m not sure how an institution reaches that conclusion.

   Yes … there are most definitely covens of faculty whackjobs on any campus that hate intercollegiate athletics.  These loons are as single issue obsessed as any abortion rights activists.  Hating athletics is ingrained in their essence since that junior high dance fiasco and there is no room for debate or discussion.  The ivory towers of academia are the last refuge for these “spotted owls” … its their “old growth forests”.  If these hardline academics abdicate control of their habitat to the crass masses who invade their world on Fall Saturdays, they become even more marginalized than they have always been.  


Swagger’s Stumper

Who did each of these guys work for?

1. Charlie Wooster

2. Wishbone

3. Mr Smee


   Whatever each institution decides … let’s follow Swagger’s theory of “Don’t let the nutz frame the debate!”.  Now we introduce our new name for the quintessential Internet Lunatics and crackpots – Al Bundy.  Yes, that hapless “loser” from Married With Children.  A failure in every phase of his life yet, hiding behind his keyboard, he has convinced himself that he has the vision and wisdom to lead stadiums full of his ilk to new heights of reflected glory.  

    For the paper clips he has gotten stuck in his ear … for all the times he has worn one navy blue sock and one black sock … Dickie Baddour IS smarter than the Al Bundys.  Bless his heart, our favorite administrative chipmonk trudges ever onward guided by some long ago image of UNC as some bright shining star in the collegiate firmament.  

    If it is UNC’s (and the other schools) destiny to complete this new stage of their intercollegiate make-over by leveling the admissions standards, then it will not be by Dickie’s decree.  The future of UNC in the New ACC lies with our old buddies “The Snoots” and the BOT. Here it gets dicey.

    Some of these folks are stuck in a Choo Choo Time Warp.  They are no more “in touch” with the competitive realities of Div 1-A Football 2004 than they are with how to change the oil in their Lexus.  “Oil … what oil?”  They will cower behind The Little Prince (now THERE’s a visual) and let him be the straw dog and Judas goat.  Oh, they hear the angry cries from the Al Bundys but so long as all the hung effigies are of a 5’8” white-haired little fellow wearing Florsheim Tassels … well, “that’s what we pay the hired help for anyway”.

    This is not about “this season” or even John Bunting’s tenure.  It is about accepting the world that IS “The New ACC” … or being content to lose on Saturdays and smugly harrumph “but we ARE UNC … so there”.

    It is going to be fun to watch.  Get whipped like a rented mule on Fall Saturdays, enduring unmerciful abuse from colleagues … OR … have a few dozen overly aggressive thugs and hooligans on campus.  Unless they beat up somebody or steal something, it’s pretty easy to ignore the hooligans.  It’s not like they actually go to class anyway.   

Willie Cooper from Elm City NC was the first “black” to play for a UNC basketball team.  Willie, coached by Harvey Reid at Elm City, played Freshman BB at UNC in 1964 … two years before Charles Scott.  Documented in The Legend’s book.

Upcoming BobLee ALIVE Shows

BobLee is coming to Charlotte … Wednesday – August 18 – Charlotte West Rotary Club … Details to follow.

Big Swagger Show for Triad Sports Club on Tues – August 3rd at Marriott PTI … Details on Thursday.

Swagger in Wilson on August 9 for Wilson Rotary 

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