ACC Pigskin Preview ’08

January16/ 2000

BobLee cuts thru the yadda yadda from the street corner pundits and fuzzy-cheeked faux-experts to bring you all you need to know about ACC FB ’08.  It’s late August.  Dreams of bowl glory in December are as numerous as Obama yard signs in Carrboro.  Alas,  reality WILL bite.  Disgruntled loons will form websites as “sleeping giants” snooze.  Who will be this year’s Missouri and Kansas? …. Read More McDuff.  Read More.

“It’s Football season”.  A few of you will, despite my on-going admonitions, become occasional board monkeys. Being cross-eyed with hairy palms is not the end of the world.  Spending countless hours debating the width of uniform pants stripes with Napoleon Dynamite and Al Bundy may indeed be God’s plan for your life.…..   You are always welcome here regardless just be careful with the bodily fluids, OK?

I can offer two excellent alternatives for your ACC Football addiction that avoid bottom-feeding with the goggle-eyed loonies …. in addition to, of course, the #1 alternative – right here.

  1.  Dave Glenn’s ACC Sports Journal either in print or his revised on-line site.  Look over yonder on the right for the link to DG’s on-line stuff.  It’s being “re-upfitted” and should be at full-speed really soon.  If you subscribe to DG’s ACCSports TELL DAVE YOU ARE A BOBLEE BUDDY and he’ll knock $10 off the annual subscription price.  Really!  He will. ….. THE BEST ACC Sports coverage EVER …. and better now than it’s ever been.  GUARANTEED No discussion of uniform stripes, team entry music, or rival fans’ sexual abnormalities.

 2.  Hokie Jim’s A-Line ….  Yeah, Jim is a hard-core gobbler but a straight-shooter who “calls a Vick a Vick”.  If you get most of BobLee’s obtuse comments you will do fine w/ Jim’s.  And yes, he borrowed “Little Johnny Swofford” from yours truly.  No charge to subscribe to Jim’s A-line.  Do it.  You’ll like it.

 OK here’s BobLee’s annual ACC Pigskin Preview. WHOAAAA NELLIE!   ….. Remember BobLee’s most inviolatable truism ….. The Difference between Four Ws and Seven or More Ws is a 3rd string O-Line.  Big’uns knees and a surgeon’s scapel go together like Franklin Street and deranged derelicts …. Inseparable (money line!).  If your team is playing chubby walk-ons (aka “for real college students!”) in November …. You won’t be bowling in December.


 ….. I’ve always liked Paul Johnson.  He’s a no frills, lunch pail totin’ guy who went to Navy AND WON.  The first to do that since Bull Halsey at Midway.  He played the same odd schedule that his predecessors played for the past 20 years but HE WON quickly and consistently.  No reason he won’t do likewise in The Land of 1,000 Peachtree Streets.

Football ain’t that complicated folks.  “Paul Johnson’s system” may be a bit different from some others but he and his staff know how to teach it to 18-20 y/os.  Johnson like his predecessor Gailey in that he eschews self-promotion.  Unlike Chan, Paul will not have John “The Genius” Tenuta to peer down from his Grant Field aviary and scowl for ESPN.  Paul will not be a quote machine.  GaTech was a consistent 7-8 W program under Chan …. They will continue to be so under Paul Johnson ….. maybe a slight dip this “adjustment year” but still 5-6 Ws.

 ….. TO’Bs seniors including Matt Ryan are gone.  Can Jag (and Steve Logan) replace them without a dip?  Probably not.  Somebody has to slip back in the pack.  I see BC being a “slipper”.   The jump to Head Coach is fraught with peril and each stage of being a FB CEO requires personal growth.  Might Jag hit a sophomore jinx?  BC remains the 5th choice for Boston sports fans behind the Sox, Pats, Celts and doing drunk Ted Kennedy impressions.

I’m sure BC has some good players not named Flutie but I simply don’t care.  Do they even have a stadium?  Have you ever seen it?  I rest my case. I used to live 45 minutes from BC and never visited the campus or considered attending a game.  Now I live a really long way away but still feel the same way.

 ….. Randy Shannon was a clunker coming out of the Head Coach starting gate last year.  He went out and netted a bumper crop of blue-chippers for the big move to Dolphin Stadium.  How quickly will the rookies contribute?  I don’t see the ‘Canes being “a contendah” in ’08.  Barring a year of ACC schools taking turns knocking each other off, somebody has to lose a few more than the rest.

Randy Shannon has not shown himself to be a sideline genius.  The ghost and echoes of Cane dynasties past will not follow “The U” to their new digs.


 ….. “Tommy’s Annual Swoon” is a favorite gig from rival board monkeys.  Clemson is forever assailed for their fast starts that somehow start sputtering in late October and November.  When the leaves start falling so do Tommy’s teams.  Death Valley is THE BEST Gameday in the ACC (sorry Hokies!) but there seems to be an invisible ceiling keeping Tommy’s Tigers from becoming a Top Tier program.

Tommy’s roster is as strong as it’s ever likely to be.  Expectations are high at The Esso Club.  Another swoon and Daddy Bowden may outlast every one of his boys as an employed Head Coach.

….. I don’t much like Algroh.   Don’t know why, I just don’t.  Algroh proves the old adage that wearing an old gray sweatshirt on the sideline ain’t cool unless Tom Brady is your QB.  I kept predicting Al’s weekly demise last year and he would sneak by again and again.  The Great NFL Legend has had a string of February signees that never quite make it to September as well as on-going program casualties.  Does he recruit “thuggier” kids or is Al just not as adept at hiding his thug-aletes as are his ACC contemporaries?   Howie’s Kid is gone and so is the horseshow Al had up his butt in ’07.  Quite Bad Times in C-ville this Fall.

This WILL BE the year that Tar Heels will leave Scott Stadium all smiles.  BUTCH WILL BEAT ALGROH on October 18 …. Me and Missus will be there to see it but The Bomars & McCauleys will not be.  Goal Line & Miss Brook get hitched Oct 18.

 ….. Frank is Frank is Frank.  Ol’ Turkey Neck has seen it all in his double decades in Blacksburg.  He built his Hokie Dynasty on smash mouth football in the trenches and a steady stream of Tidewater speedsters.  Critics of BeamerBall will drone on about “the Vicks” forever but Frank and his loyal staff know what works for them.  Smash mouth football relies on three-deep big’uns that Frank & Co keep in the Hokie Hopper.

It won’t be a “great” year for Lane Loyalists  but a “good” year for Frank Beamer would be “very good” for most programs.

…. Is it just me or is this THE quietest program in Division I?  TO’B makes Penn Gillette’s mute pal Teller seem loquacious.  In the tumultuous Amato Era there always seemed to be some crisis or bombast ongoing ‘tween Hillsborough St & Western Blvd.  The Marine is about as far from The Chest in as many ways as two human beings can be.  WuffLoons will claim it’s because of those darn UNC J-Schoolers controlling the column inches of the regional print media. ….. Reality is that “regional media” (especially “print”) has simply lost its impact amid “the new media”. ….. TO’B is very comfortable with himself.

Remember those panicing WuffLoons last Sept/Oct and how TO’B stayed his course and had that solid run the 2nd half of the season.  It takes a minimum of three seasons to develop a solid program that can endure key personnel injuries.  TO’B isn’t there yet.  If The Red & White can dodge ACLs and rotator cuffs they should be solid but not spectacular.  A TO’B program may never be spectacular but neither was Dick Sheridan’s and he did quite well.

Duke …. You know I like David Cutcliffe.  I believe he has the right coaching philosophy to maximize Duke’s overall football potential …. whatever that may be.  Cutcliffe will struggle more than Paul Johnson in implementing “his system”.  GaTech has “depth”.  Duke is thinner than Cocoa Puff’s resume.

Coach Cut will pick up 3 W’s just on his sideline skills but they will be in Sept/Oct.  With Kevin White scheduling “smart” and Cut getting some good “throwers & catchers” look for the Devils to be in the 4-5-6 W range in three years. …. The Wally Wade restrooms continue to “be an issue” so Pee before you go.

…. The ‘Noles will linger on the backside of The Bowden Era until Bobby goes adios.  Bobby does not have enough “oomph” left in his tank to relight Osceola’s spear.  Urban has gotten first dibs on the cream of Florida blue chippers for three years now.  The off-field chaos that has symbolized FSU Football for decades will continue to ooze and detract from any program retooling.  Those 3rd and 4th string linemen that wore down opponents for years are now starting at South Florida and Central Florida.  DEPTH is always the key to year in/ year out 9+ Ws.  …. When FSU’s most publicized football personality is a shameless skank named Jenn Sterger, Doak-Campbell ain’t a happy place.

Regardless of their record, Little Johnny guarantees’em a spot in the ACCCG just so he doesn’t have to drape off the upper deck one more time.  The WNBA draws a bigger crowd than the ACCCG…. ouch!

…. Is Maryland still in the ACC?  Is that big fat guy still their coach?  Does anyone really much care?  Maryland is not THE most obscure program in the ACC …. That’s why Little Johnny Swofford brought in Boston College.  We knew there HAD to be a reason.  No one is calling Ralphie “The Mark Mangino Of The East“ these days (money line!).  The difference between “a genius” and “that fat guy” is back-back mediocre seasons.

Boomer Esiason and Randy White will weep as the Terps mire in mediocrity. ….. Greg Schiano is draining The Fridge’s recruiting waters.

…. The Deacon Juggernaut just “reloads” as the redshirt pipeline pumps fresh meat to America’s Anomaly Team ….. the one program that is the exception that proves the rule.  Yes, you can “do it right and win” without selling your institutional soul to semi-literate 18 y/os, but it takes patience, dedication and unique leadership.  Wake has it.  No 80,000 seats …. No audacious bling bling …. No five-star thug-aletes …. Just Good Neighbor Grobe and Cool Hand Wellman doing what seems naturally.  The Heels don’t face Grobe’s Juggernaut for a few years ….. that’s a good thing.

If Riley (“Reille”??) Skinner can keep his clothes on look for the Deacs to win The Mack Brown Cup again.

…. OK, enough about the hypocrisy of Big Time College Football and enough about Jimma Sexton and the ransom payment and the silly Kenan bling bling and recruits of dubious intellect …. It is what it all is.  Don’t ask what The Pale Rider is putting in the sausage ….

Butch Davis doesn’t do underdog that well, BUT he has proven he can win football games when his’n is noticeably better than your’n.  “His’n” is definitely better this year than “his’n” were last year. ….. (another money line!)

There are three keys to a successful College Football program.  (1) Organization ….. (2) Recruiting … (3) Game Decisions.  There is no (4) “Bleeding Blue” which, alas, was Burly John’s strength.  Butch has 2 of the 3 on his side with “sideline genius” not among his resume cred.  Until Butch’s “his’n” get even deeper, faster, stronger, meaner the Boyz In Blue won’t bring back memories of Mack’s Men of The 90s but 6 Ws and a whozit bowl is a reasonable expectation.   One W WILL BE on October 18 in Scott Stadium.  Bet the ranch on that one.

Blue Bleedin’ Board Monkeys will arm themselves with their usual arsenal of pitiful excuses (media agin’us, referees agin’us, schedule too hard, That Damn Dickie Baddour, global warming and, a brand new one – “she was in remission”) …. The rest of us real fans w/ real lives will make seven pilgrimages to Kenan for color, pageantry, country ham biscuits, bloody marys, flipping cheerleaders and lotsa laffs with old friends.  I like that last part a lot.

The Tailgate Nazi (aka Officer Swain) has been gone now for six years but the Blue Bleedin Board Monkeys never got the memo.  Bitch and whine and bitch and whine.  Gameday in Chapel Hill will continue to be whatever each fan makes it for himself.  BobLee will have a BOFFO time because I choose to.  I’m working on having Chancellor Doogie hang glide off the Bell Tower tossing Nabs to everyone who remembers Zackie Murphy and/or Kennard Martin. …. Or maybe he’ll just join Butch on The Old Well Walk. ….. Zigga Zoomba ya’ll.


Name two Jim Grobe predecessors 

NOT named Mackovic or Peahead. 


   Hugh’s bear was Mildred.  Hugh’s wife was Mrs Morton.

   Guess who is “writing a book” ???  Duke Lacrosse Ho #1 – Crystal Gail Mangum aka “honor student single mother of (now) three” and darling of The N&O’s Melanie Sill & Linda Williams.  Hang on Sloopy …. this oughta be a screamin’ HOOT!  Due out in October.

   Spent Wednesday within the legendary secretive gated enclave of Governors Club with ORW, Sylvia Hatchell, Dick Coop, Prince Albert and some fine charitable folks to benefit Agape Corner in Derm.  Agape Corner is a Christian “foster home” care center that, being “faith-based”, cannot receive Fed funds but can receive the $$$ benevolence of “rich country club (mostly)Republicans”.  Ol’ Roy and Sylvia gave willingly of their time and good-nature.  A most fine time was had by all followed by dinner at Squids’ courtesy of co-owner Greg Overbeck.

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