Politicians – Social Media and other Really Bad Ideas

Tweeting
Agent Pierce
January28/ 2017

Politicians, Social Media… and other Really Bad Ideas.  Maybe amend that to “for Conservative/Repub Pols it’s a bad idea”.

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Luckily for Our America, Donald Trump did NOT seek my advice prior to November 8th. If he hadda, I fear we would all be watching a Mega-Media Donald Trump InaugOrgasm for Madame Prez Hillybeast…. Aaaaiiieeee!

I probably would have had him ratchet back on the full-bore “I’m Donald Trump – You’re Not – and I’m going to be POTUS”. I would have dialed him back towards the typical Repub empty-suit – don’t offend anyone – apologize for all your core beliefs – and excite absolutely no one to get out and vote for you. Yes, I was afraid DT was Too Much. Turns out he was Just Enough… and here we are. YIPPPEEEE!

Am I still sorta kinda holding my breath that Prez Donald doesn’t go Full Throttle Tourette Syndrome and have all The Founding Fathers flipping their wigs? Well yeah. Aren’t you? That’s why he’s where he is and we’re all still on Facebook asking one another if it’s OK to really HATE liberals. Sure it is. Change HATE to “really don’t like’em AT ALL” and you’ll feel better about yourself. …. Whatever.

Donald and America has survived (1) The Electoral College thingie…. and (2) The Inaug…. and (3) The First Week…. and even (4) that Ugly Wimmen w/ Potty Mouths Parade & Yeast Infection.  So now Prez DT should take my advice …

If he did ask for my advice (relax I’m pretty sure he won’t….), I would strongly suggest he dial back the whole Trump Tweets Thingy.  I know El Rushbo likes it as do assorted others… but I don’t. It was fine for Candidate Donald but not so fine for POTUS Donald…. IMO.

NOTE: I don’t know how much contempt you have for “the mainstream media” but I bet I have a lot more. I loathe the no-count weasels. Render the whole lot of’em down in a giant vat of boiling oil and you won’t get a teaspoon of integrity for your efforts. We can debate whether they (“MSM”) are ignorant or evil to which I say what difference does it make. They are “the enemy”.  Never forget that for one second.  “They” have even less respect for you than you have for them. “They” have less respect for you/us now than ever before and they never had any respect for us to begin with. But alas… like cockroaches, diarrhea, toe fungus and Michael Moore – they are not going away.

I get that POTUS DJT is using Twitter to get around the MSM and speak directly to “us” unfiltered. OK… but I think (1) he’s not very good at tweeting. No offense. I’m not any good at building a real estate empire. …. (2) he’s got way more important stuff he oughta be doing every day like building walls… throwing out The UN… instituting vouchers (YES!)… pissing off tin-pot warlords… replacing Obamacare… etc etc.Trump Tweets

Who knows what his tweeting routine is? Does Donald carry his smartphone in his pocket (coat or pants?)… thinks of something he’s sure is really clever… taps it out… and hits SEND. That’s how we all do it, right?  Actually I’ve started using a stylus…. less typos. Does the dude carrying the nuclear football carry DJT’s phone for him?

Tweeting was not invented to run the #1 Superpower on the planet. Neither was “Snapbook” or “Instachat” or “PinUp” or whatever next week’s hot new gizmo app will be. Yes, I know those are not their names. When Bill Belichek said it it was funnier.

The only reason DJT’s tweets are memorable are because they are DJT’s Tweets. IMO his tweets come across as grumpy harrumphs from your Uncle Leo complaining “they oughta bring back Gunsmoke and Bonanza by golly”.  Puhleeeze.

DJT needs a sharp as a tack “tweetist” to compose his 140 characters for him.  DJT signs off on each one before they go out of course. “Tweetist” is now an occupational category? I just made it one.

For instance, that recent dust-up with that “I did to used to be a Civil Rights icon” galoot. Imagine if DJT had simply tweeted: John Lewis

“Congressman Lewis is desperately seeking media attention. I’m certain he will get it.”

as regards his feud with SNL, I’d tweet:

SNL ?? Is that still on the air?  Those Coneheads were a hoot.

What liberals cannot tolerate is being made fun of / being slighted.  They take themselves more seriously than Alzheimers.  Never let’em know they got to you.  That attention is what they crave.  That C-list skank Chelsea Handler got more attention last week for her Melania insult that she has EVER gotten in her irrelevant career in the wilderness of midnight TV.

It is a form of verbal decapitation known as “a straight razor across the jugular” rather than a clumsy sledge hammer. The victim “bleeds out” before he/she realizes they were zapped. Every prominent Lib/Dem goober is a primo target for “a straight razor” tweet.

OK, I hear you thinking “why not YOU AgentPierce?” I’ve got way too sweet a deal with SaidWhatMedia and BobLee. Maybe I could help-out in a National Emergency or if I could sit in “the leg chair” on The Five?

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Here in NC we just had two examples of why “Politicians & Social Media” are a bad idea. Two Repub State Legislators tweeted great zingers about the Ugly Wimmen w/ Potty Mouths Parade & Yeast Infection.

One was (paraphrasing) “it got more fat women exercising in one weekend than Michelle Obama could in eight years”.

The other one was AWESOME about “…. If brains were lard, there wasn’t enough (at that demonstration) to grease a small skillet….”.

My first thought was DAMN, I wish I’d thought of that. My second thought was Uh Oh…Jim Goodmon

WRAL’s Jim Goodmon – The Triangle’s #1 Limo Liberal – hired a team of dumpster-divers specifically to find such comments and turn them against the Repubs that make them. That’s what happened with both “R” Legislators publicly apologizing.

As an elected official of the Repub/Conservative persuasion…. NEVER say anything on social media you do not want to be an above-the-fold headline or news lead on WRAL or a McClatchy newspaper. NEVER… NEVER… NEVER unless you are willing to say “Hell yeah I said it… and I’ll say it again…”.

Lib/Dem politicians, of course, can say or do anything incredibly stoopid and be assured it will never be promoted EXCEPT in the Conserv blogosphere… where Lib/Dem brain-dead voters never venture.

The Media Battlefield of The Present / Future is The Internet /Social Media. Whichever side maneuvers most effectively in this “snake-infested swamp” will win.

Lots More AgentPierce – CLICK!

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Hey, you think Pierce is “something”, well he is … But

BobLee is Da Man …. CLICK!

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  • Chris in Winston-Salem Reply
    2 months ago

    Krawiec’s tweet was unnecessary but she made the situation worse by apologizing.

    • Agent Pierce Reply
      2 months ago

      Unnecessary unless she was ready & willing to stand behind it. I’m sure it was “an old saying” but not one I’d ever heard and funny as it could be. That is was so funny and got so much retweet exposure is probably how WRAL’s dumpster diver Laura Leslie found it. “Apologizing” as she did was humiliating for her and a coup for Leslie. NOT GOOD.

  • NCSU68Grad Reply
    2 months ago

    Excellent Column, AP. BL would be proud of you.
    I (gasp….this will SHOCK YOU) can NEVER Tweet…
    I agree that Trump’s Tweets are sometimes “over the top”, however, he DOES seem to have a knack for it.
    He is totally unpredictable. Based on all the heat of the day, I really thought that he would have “used” tonight’s podium for a couple of shots at the Sore Losers. He did NOT. I bet my DW that 8:08 would have been the “launch time”. BUT, he stuck to the script and did not ask Chuck Schummer if he cried on 9/11? According to the NYPD Police Commisioner, he was stoic and unemotional and gave lip service to the tragedy.

    • Agent Pierce Reply
      2 months ago

      WHAT! I can’t believe YOU can’t condense your thoughts into 140 spaces !! Say it ain’t so Shoeless Joe! 🙂
      .
      I would prefer POTUS DT not acknowledge the slimey profane weasels. If he does… LAUGH at them.

  • Jay Reply
    2 months ago

    Best paragraph I’ve read in years:

    “NOTE: I don’t know how much contempt you have for “the mainstream media” but I bet I have a lot more. I loathe the no-count weasels. Render the whole lot of’em down in a giant vat of boiling oil and you won’t get a teaspoon of integrity for your efforts. We can debate whether they (“MSM”) are ignorant or evil to which I say what difference does it make. They are “the enemy”. Never forget that for one second. “They” have even less respect for you than you have for them. “They” have less respect for you/us now than ever before and they never had any respect for us to begin with. But alas… like cockroaches, diarrhea, toe fungus and Michael Moore – they are not going away.”

    • Agent Pierce Reply
      2 months ago

      The words “toe fungus” and “Michael Moore” were just meant to go together. Don’t you think?

  • Myowngrandpaw Reply
    2 months ago

    I vote for Marvin Austin for one of the all-time tweets!

    Honestly, I don’t think I have known a tweet that went so nuclear and affected literally thousands of people and STILL affecting hundreds. Not to mention MILLIONS in legal fees, probations, firings, retirements, resignations, scapegoats, denials and “studies”. And still to be continued..

    Most just destroy the tweeter!

    Marvin’s was a tsunami!

    • Agent Pierce Reply
      2 months ago

      EXCELLENT POINT! Imagine The Planet if Young Marv had not hit SEND! He is long gone to wherever but the DEVASTATION continues …. 🙂

  • Bill.in.Boston Reply
    2 months ago

    Pierce, your country NEEDS YOU as it’s Tweetist. Your strategy on Trump Tweeting is PERFECT. POTUS DT is letting the crazies know they bother him. “Laughing at them” is like a crucifix to a vampire. They cannot stand it. Surely you can do it from SaidWhatMedia’s secret HQ bunker. WE NEED YOU!

    • Agent Pierce Reply
      2 months ago

      Have KellyAnne call me. I’ll listen but I’m afraid my demands would nix any deal. 🙂

  • Porcophile Reply
    2 months ago

    Trump can be really good at effective one-liners. My favorite was when Megyn Kelly went after him for calling women “fat pigs, dogs, slobs, and disgusting animals,” and he said “Only Rosie O’Donnell.” He got a laugh and she had to find a new line of questioning. If he was more consistent, I’d love to see him tweet away.

    • Agent Pierce Reply
      2 months ago

      Unfortunately he gets graded on everything he sends out. Even “spontaneous” zingers usually require a few minutes to polish when every character counts. It is not the best use of his time as POTUS. His harrumps against SNL and Baldwin seem (IMO) to give them exactly what they crave – “we got under his skin”. Every C-list whozit is taking shots trying to goad him into a one-on-one fire-back,.. like that Chelsea Handler skank.

  • robedixon Reply
    2 months ago

    I was doing fine reading here until the thought of Agent Pierce sitting in The Five leg chair. Talk about ugly wimmen, oh my.

    • Agent Pierce Reply
      2 months ago

      Thats what we call “lets see who actually reads this stuff” stuff. I would not “do a Guilfoyle”. Just snap a pic of me there. FWIW… I miss Tantaros in that chair. I find Kimberly “a bit much”.

  • Sheri.Wilm Reply
    2 months ago

    You wrote several weeks ago about some Hollyweird nutjob that BobLee dug up. Anything new on her?

    • Agent Pierce Reply
      2 months ago

      I presume you are referring to Very Very Angry Alex – “the crime novelist with the concrete colon”. BobLee and Alex have not had any more direct communications but BL follows her Twitter feed. Alas Very Very Angry Alex seems to be angrier and angrier and angrier. As Donald The Monster passes each new benchmark – Elect College / Inaug / First Week, Alex’s head emits more and more smoke and spins faster and faster. We don’t think she actually marched in the National Yeast Infection last weekend but she was cheering’em on via Twitter. We’re keeping a close eye on this quite crazy critter. 🙂

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