Stan Didn’t Tweet

October19/ 2013

It’s mid-October and the St Louis Cardinals are still playing Baseball.  A mighty fine tradition in the middle of a seriously ill country doing it’s level best to stomp out and destroy anything and everything it’s citizens might rally ‘round and cheer for.

A lot more babies are being thrown out than bathwater as America races to get its national hand basket so deep in Hell it will never find its way back.   Our fateful descent did not start yesterday and it won’t stop tomorrow.   We blame Them and They blame Us and we all just keep on descending…….

Somewhere you just know there are a dozen pitiful souls who blame harmonicas for their own personal failures.   They will find a sleazy ACLU lawyer to take their case.  Before we know it that rendition of #6 playing Take Me Out To The Ballgame over the Busch Stadium PA will be banned.  Don’t laugh….. I give it five more years at most.

St Louis Cardinal Baseball is NOT the very last grand tradition not yet outlawed by the latest insane ideologue de jour’s vision of his personal utopia….. but the list of those still left gets shorter every day so enjoy it today.

There will only be two baseball teams still standing after this weekend.  One of those two teams wear “Birds On The Bats” on their chest.   Who will survive the next “cut” remains to be settled.  I can’t predict that outcome but I can predict that……

The plethora of sniping attacks on Cardinal Baseball and Cardinal Baseball Fans will continue to escalate.  Yes, you’ve seen it for several weeks now…. since the playoffs began.   It will get worse.

“It” is called The Tebow Effect and it is spread by ESPN and its ilk in the sports media and, of course, via Satan’s personal media – The Internet.   Find anything wholesome and positive in American society and throw garbage at it until it too is as fetid and soiled as it’s toxic self-loathing attackers.zombies4

As America’s Abject Hatred of Itself grows by self-inflicted wounds…… long-standing uplifting tradition like “being a Cardinal Baseball fan” are the primo targets of the venomous zombie mob.

Cardinal fans are being goaded into playing idiot roulette on the Internet.  A keyboard sicko spews out his personal hatred for mom, apple pie and Cardinal fans and it “goes viral”.    Cardinal fans see it and rush to retaliate…… citing all the goodness that “being a Cardinal fan” has meant to generations of their family.

They bravely enter “the toxic mosh pit” that is the Internet to defend their beloved regional rallying symbol – The Birds On The Bat.  That, alas, is a sucker’s bet.

All the generations of Cardinal loyalists from The GasHousers of Sportsman’s Park  to Matheny’s Kids in the latest version of Busch Stadium are outnumbered by the zombie army of witless goobers on the Internet.

Witless soulless goobers from every squalid hell-hole being systematically flushed down the economic toilet by crooked liberal politicians (can you say “Detroit” boys and girls?)  will vent their own city’s failures versus Cardinal fans.

If some innocent kid in Webster Grove proudly sporting his David Freese jersey dares to enter the cyber mosh pit to speak up for his heroes he will be disemboweled.  It’s “the Internet Way”.  Ask fans of Tim Tebow….. or “The Mannings”.

Ol’ BobLee is gonna clue you in on a little secret.   Those pathetic witless goobers are like stoopid trees falling in the deep woods.  If you don’t hear them….. they make no noise.   Don’t listen….. don’t read (except this column of course) and let them stew and rot in their own bile.

Piss on’em.  We’re Cardinals fans – We win even when we don’t.

Cardinals fans listen up….. yes, I’m talking to YOU – in toney LaDue and South County and St Charles and Dago Hill and Kirkwood and down river at Cape and Poplar Bluff and up river at Hannibal and Quincy and across river in Granite City and Wood River and west to Jeff City and Rolla and in every nook & every cranny of Mid America reached by the mega-watt blowtorch of KMOX.

If you’ve EVER enjoyed a Ted Drewes Custard….. celebrated a special occasion at Stan & Biggies or The Boat House @ Forest Park or Cyrano’s ….. The Muni Opera…. The Veiled Prophet….. played a round at Bellerive……  have a Stan or Gibby or Ozzie jersey your parents bought you at Famous-Barr or Stix,Baer&Fuller.

Love your Birds On The Bat…. in The Shadow of The Arch
Love Those Clydesdales !! …… those grand and noble Clydesdales !!!

Love….. Red, Pepper, Paul & Dizzy, Marty, Enos, Orlando, Shannon, McCarver, Eckstein, Gibson, Curt, Ducky, Ozzie, Whitey, Tony, Harry and Jack, and “Fred” and yes, even Big Mc and Albert…… and, most of all we have #6 – Mr Cardinal …… Forever the personification of each & every man that has ever proudly worn “The Birds on The Bat” across his chest.

… and now Matheny’s Boys – Freese and Carlos and The Matts and Yadi and Wano….. and this new kid Wacha.   To all who have ever worn the interlocking StL.

Cardinal Fans Be Proud.….. for as long as there is on-going construction at Lambert Field….. or Forever whichever comes first.

To play for the Angels  =  $20,000,000/year
To be a Cardinals’ Fan  =  Priceless For Life
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