A Mob Math Question

July30/ 2013

Among the “millions and millions” of goggle-eyed Republican-haters who OVERFLOWED (!!) Downtown Raleigh on Monday last, I wonder if there were any Math Teachers? …. assuming “they” still teach Math in NC Public Schools?

If there were any math teachers among’em, I have a question for’em…..

It was Monday in Raleigh so, of course, B’rer Barber convened another of his Pentacostal Pep Rallies / Hate-a-thons. This one had an educational theme. B’rer is now the cruise director on the SS Hate Republicans. He is adding “a theme” to each week’s festivities.

Last week Bill honored all those who “love abortions”. Not surprisingly there were no unborn fetuses in attendance. The really ugly gal with the sign calling for “Abortions Up To Age Five” got funny looks even from her fellow Barber-ians. Photo-journalists carefully avoided getting THAT sign in their Nikons.

Next week will it be the No Fracking Nutz…. maybe Marijuana For Pre-Schoolers or the lovelies from Exterminate Heterosexuals. B’rer Barber’s Bunch has some very diverse factions. Indeed.

Today I have some math questions.

B’rer’s Whizbang Mob Mathematicians say there were “at least 10,000” screamin’ loonies at yesterday Hate-A-Thon. Capitol Police who have been counting similar protest mobs for 100 years say “maybe 2,500”. That’s a 7,500 discrepancy. I figured out how come.

Barber’s Mob-counters included The Freakin’ Squirrels in the nearby park. Who would argue that Barber loyalists are certifiably “squirrely” aka “nuttier than a truckload of Payday bars”. Its only fair that Barber gets to include the local squirrels as his’n. Were there 7,500 squirrels in attendance? That’s a heckuva lot of squirrels.

Suggestion to RevBill: Bill, when guessing event attendances, NEVER use a round number. Say There was 10,754. It gives the illusion you actually counted each one. WRAL and N&O will say whatever you want’em to regardless…. (wink, wink)

I admit “the squirrels” are a lot cuter than most of Barber’s two-legged loonies. My earlier description of how Janis Joplin mighta looked if she had lived to 70 is apparently going viral.

Back in November of 2012, when North Carolinians OVERWHELMINGLY threw out Bevie-Poo and her gang of thieves and charlatans; there was a goober named Wally Dalton on the ballot. Wally, bless his heart, got 1,931,750 votes…. or so they say.

NOTE: 1,931,750 was 43.17% of votes cast. According to Public Policy Polling, Laura Leslie and Rob Christensen 43.17% constitutes “a landslide”. Huh? Regardless it was “our guy” Pat McCrory that got inaugurated in January. Yippee!

Give or take 127 of those Wally voters had some form of personal identification but back in those days, that was Okey Dokey. Any hoo…. my question is:

Anyone who wasted their vote (or votes in the case of those serial voters, and you know who you are….) on Wally had to REALLY REALLY hate PatMcCrory and me and pretty much anyone with an (R ) anywhere near their name. So there are 1,931,750 hard-core Republican-haters between Murphy and Manteo.

But B’rer Barber can only muster 10,000 of’em (IF we count those squirrels of course) to join his weekly Hoot’n Hatin Fests ? Where’s the other 1,921,750 of’em?

Where does one hide 1,921,750 hard-wired goggle-eyed, spittle-spewing, obscenity-screamin, abortion-luvin, heterosexual-hatin, pin-headed mangy malcontents?

If you see’em…. or even 1,000,000 of’em (let that other 921,750 go for now) PLEASE get a picture of’em on your iPhone and get it to me ASAP….. that’s [email protected]

Thanks. Just take their picture. DON’T TOUCH’em. I’m pretty sure they have Kooties.

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